Current mood- Spluches

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0_92ii7S8WE

These were shown to me by Comrade  sneakcoyote

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=P1i465X0W3w#t=478s

http://www.youtube.com/user/dprksqu.....52/AZMSVz_S0Zk


North Korean Propaganda Cartoons! These are probably the most badass cartoons I have ever seen. It's like Redwall with Juche Communism and guns.

Khello please.

FC is over and holy fuck, am I drained. We throw you party and because of all you, my comrades, it was very great success! We put a lot of effort and money to throw you the best damn party, I hardly had much time for anything else, but fuck if it wasn't worth it. Thank you all for coming, for spreading the Party Revolution, for cabbage, and for having fun with us. I'm surprised at how infectious it was. I was amazed when I went out on the party floor and thruout the rest of the con, hearing everyone in drunk angry Russian accents yelling "FUCK TO YOU! WHY YOU FUCK!"

Special moments to include: Getting drunk in a fursuit and yelling at people with a megaphone, Wondering with Comrade  erro's Dead Dog fursuit parade broadcasting Red Army Orchestra along the streets of San Jose, Hanging around the headless lounge with Comrade  quixoticmutt reading from the Quotations of Chairman Mao with a megaphone, and crashing and ending the Dead Dog Dance with http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g-IzLU6iWO8 .

Special thanks to Comrades  luckyfox  phrozensky  sixarmedwerewolf and  xjacobsx for making this all possible, and to Comrade  kartfox for letting me be a drunken idiot with a megaphone in his suit and making look like a total jackass. I think I had as much fun as anyone could physically and emotionally have over one weekend. If anyone has or finds photos and videos of me and the party, please send it my way. Now it's time to deal with the Post Con Depression.

Again, thank you everyone.


MOTHERLAND


That's right, bitches! Stand in line and get yourself a Pazyryk original. Guarenteed to: increase confidence, stand out in parties, reduce overall unsightly bodily funk and odors, and make you feel better about your life and the decisions you've made. Act now and receive +1 Internet for free!

My friend, I make you good deal!

Starting price- $40. Will also accept ducats, dinars, drachmas, guilders, guineas, riyals, rupees, rubles, shekels, shillings, florins, farthings, pieces of eight, potatoes, accordion and ham sandwich. NO EUROS

Studies prove that 9 out of 10 British housewives can tell the difference between a Pazyryk original and a dead crab.

Cutting out the middleman reduces import costs and lets me pass the savings on to you!


(Results may vary. Consult doctor before accepting. Side effects may include: loose stools, irritable bowel syndrome, sleepiness, insomnia, increased internet, and fanboying)

I have made glorious return to the Homeland!

After spending a few miserable days at the demob station in Jersey, I finally made it back home last month. Can't say much about the past year. Pretty miserably long and boring. Very, VERY, boring. Didn't see any "action" or kill anyone, just a few rockets. Which wasn't anything worse than fireworks. It was interesting to see Iraq and to know the people there, but it mostly just a year of endless bullshit and mind numbing tedium. Other than I got to go to Ireland for leave, which was pretty badass. Mett the following peoples:  alystair-the-cat  arach  sofox and some other whom I forgot because drank a LOT of Guinness and Jameson and spent a LOT of money, but it was all in good fun.

As far as what I'm doing next, I don't have much an idea. Currently staying at my parent's prairie castle in Oklahoma happily being the laziest I can be and play with fireworks. I should be moving back to Phoenix some time at the end of this month. Then we shall make party!

Good news everyone! I'll be in Iraq by August.

So I don't think I'll be able to draw much around the next year. Not that I drew much anyway.

So if anybody needs me I'll be some place hot and dusty over the hills and far away.

A report of life in a box. It's continues on it's blah course. Currently having trouble keeping myself interested in working on my current projects so as of right now I am taking a commission. A COMMISSION. Just one. First come first serve. I just want to do one for profit for now just to see if'n I'm any good at it. Something simple and cheep like 15$, 20$. I need something to motivate me to draw more so I can better my career as an artist and give me something to do because I am bored. I mean really bored I'm about to eat my own teeth just to give me something to do.

In other news: The African Union suspends Niger's membership following the recent military coup in the country; King Mohammed of Morocco requests structural examinations of all the country's old mosques after a minaret collapse kills 41 people; Romania is set to introduce a tax on fast food in March; and I'm getting activated come June for an eventual deployment.

So that's a whole other can of bullshit I have to open up and deal with and what I'll do with my stuff. And I have a lot of stuff. The fuck did all these accordions come from?

I love cheese. I tried this cheese called Blue Stilton on biscuits (that's a cracker like cookie for you uncultured plebeians) with fig jam. Fucking orgasmic. I've been eating it all day. Much of my diet consists of cheese. And beer. And sausage. If any of you ever want to make me happy just give me one of those things. In fact, I'll even accept payment for commissions with them. I'll create a Rembrandt esque masterpiece for a wheel of Edam.

Alcohol is my friend. He wants to be your friend too. He helps me not to feel feelings and quiets the voices in my head. Nothing is more satisfying than spending an evening with a bottle of Kalashnikov. Oh, Mikhail, your vodka is as strong and your assault rifle.


Current number of owned firearms: 3

Current number of owned accordions: 4

Arrival and Departure:
Some time next week.

Staying at:
Somewhere

Mode of Transportation:
1997 Ford Explorer with comrade  XJacobsX

Room Share:
Comrade  zeno_c and 5 other faggots.

Major Plans at the Con:
Make party at Glorious Communist Party, eat beet, drink vodka, play accordion.

Party like Mikhail Gorbachev! http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gNl7u_ckbHU&feature=fvw

Who Will I be with:
Everybody.

Fursuit(s):
Fursuiting is counterrevolutionary

Attending Parties:
All other parties lack belief in Communist Ideal therefor counterrevolutionary.

How best to find me:
Fallow sounds of Red Army Choir and accordion.

Stage Performance:
Executing counterrevolutionaries, beet eating contest.

Drink:
Inability to drink is counterrevolutionary and does not result in funtime.

Smoke:
Only Radium enriched Lenin's Favorite brand cigarette from old country for smooth, glowing smoke.

Hugs:
Counterrevolutionary.

Talk:
Plenty of political speech about how Capitalism is bad and Communism is best!

Art:
Distribute of propaganda

Do you do trades?
Will trade for potatoes.

What is your gender?
мужчина

How old are you?
23

Can I touch you?
схватить сейчас в счастливое место, или я исполняю!

Can I buy you lots of drinks?
Vodka.

Can I give you lots of money?
Will accept payment in form of potato, vodka or accordion.

Can I hug or snuggle with you?
Counterrevolutionary and will be execute.

How tall are you?
5'9"

You look pissed off out of suit can I come up to you?
AAAAHHHHH!!! MOTHERLAND!!!!!

Are you nice?
Was Lenin and Stalin nice?

Are you cliquey?
Cliques are bourgeois capitalist concept. All cliques will be execute.

Can I stalk you?
Only if member of Communist Party, or be execute.

Do you like parties?
Only Communist Party.

If i see you, how should i get your attention?
Throw potato.

Are you fursuiting?
All fursuiters will be execute.

Can I ask ya to dance with me during the dances?
WE DANCE MAMUSHKA!

Can I buy breakfast, lunch, or dinner sometime?
If you know restaurant that serve good borscht.

Can I take a picture of ya?
Only in glorious pose.

Can I Steal ya away for *censored*?
Yes. We can study works of Marx and discuss effects of modern economic practices in global market.

Would ya like to get a commission done of ya?
Propaganda only.

Wanna cuddle at the con?
Only if like caress of loving wife's beard stubble.

You like Shiney's?
Potatoes.

Wanna play some Xbox games?
Communist games only.

God I love bing Irish...

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6GO-irf4ZP4

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0V0TPoQBQfQ&feature=PlayList&p=C14B797E89B01F57&index=8&playnext=7&playnext_from=PL

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ztb7zve9v5Q&feature=PlayList&p=C14B797E89B01F57&index=10&playnext=9&playnext_from=PL

Need you any more proof of my Awesomeness!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YuNfjZclN8Y

I know you're sort of my boss but fuck you for taking away my clove cigerettes!

http://reason.com/news/show/125885.html

Just another example of the worsening of things to come. Just another attempt by the government to take away the American People's ability to think and chose and give bigger profit margins and eliminate competition for Philip Morris. Fuck you FDA, fuck you Philip Morris, and fuck you Obama and that cunting wife of yours! If you take away my hookah next I'll start a riot. I going to go form a militia and get my cloves back.

Currently accepting applications for con pussy at AC. Apply here http://www.pounced.org/personals/viewad.php?&hcenc=1&hpad=8272

CLASSIFIED
SERIAL: UFC 5-0017 09

SUBJECT: Report on Activities of Further Confusion 2009.

---

Anthro Union Ministry of Information

---

DATE WRITEN: 26 FEB 2009

A bit belated but I'm finally writing about my glorious trip to FC. If I can still adequately account for all the events that happened. I have drunken a lot sense then, not to include the sheer amount I consumed there.

Anyways, this year was my first time attending FC as well as my first time to California. Tho, this was not my first con, I've attended Oklacon 05 and 06 as well as MFM 06. That was, of course, when I was living back in Oklahoma. California is a weird state and I fervently despise it. That said, it was the best week of my life. It stated off exciting enough. I, as previously stated, have never been to FC so I opted to follow Comrade  semjay and Comrade  mr-taren in a convoy. While traversing thru Los Angeles, the left front wheel Taren's van so happened to lose 3 of it lug sockets and almost fell off. Faced with predicament, me and my carpool associate, Comrade  talonz_thedragon, set out on our own to find the mysterious city of San Jose. And using my impeccable navigation skills, collection of road atlases, and love of country, I single handedly wrenched success from the clutches of fail and managed in reaching this fabled land.

Thursday: Once I managed to arrive at our destination, I set out on reacquainting myself with my old associate  sohjin. I threw him an MRE and told him to get used to it, for the good Mr Sohjin is joining the Army in a few weeks. Once familiarities where reestablished, I immediately set out on my initial aspect of attending the convention: drinking. Don't remember much else of that day other than drinking whiskey with a Canadian and passing out in my car.

The rest of the days sort of blur together. I remember stomping around in my Russian and East German Uniforms and executing suiters with a little plastic pop gun. I also remember making friends with fellow soviet furs Comrade  luckyfox and Comrade  sixarmedwerewolf and together we made much merriment. Comrade Lucky had a large amount of Russian vodka and beer. Sunday, which I do manage to remember, involved me wondering around the various room parties ending at the party being thrown by my fellow Phoenicians where I got a call from Comrade Lucky wondering about my where abouts and why I wasn't drinking with them. So I found them, already plastered on Russian beer, and eventually went to Lucky's hotel to acquire more Russian beer.

Eventually, after much complaint from Comrade Six about being hungry, we, along with Talonz,  jupe, and  malignant_slurpee, all when to Denny's. Once we arrived, Six, of course, passed out on the table only moving to excuse himself to the restroom for half an hour. By the time he returned we already had our food and eaten upon which Six sat back down and resumed his coma. Eventually Lucky and me had move to another table to watch someone give a rater humorous Bill Cosby impression while Six awoke from his stupor. Seemingly hungry, he slid the rest of Lucky's sandwich over and opened his mouth to take an apparent bite, but instead vomited on Lucky's sandwich. Six then promptly covered the forlorned sandwich with napkins and left. Lucky, of course unaware of the previous befouling of his sandwich, sat down to resume consumption of his tasty dinner, but to find a plate of vomit, much to his chagrin. He then promptly left. I, at this point, noticing some associates of mine from Phoenix on the other side of the restaurant, went to show then my glorious comrade soviets: Six puking his guts out in the parking lot, Luck currently outside humping the window infront of us, and myself with beer in my pocket at Denny's, which I then spilled on my friends who were abolitionists. I left that night with a $50 bill.

The next day I spent dead dogging because I am always the last one to leave any party, and wore my friend  streakthetiger 's fursuit and promptly acted like a jackass.

--NOTHING FOLLOWS--

Not much is different. Been feeling depressed and my artistic production is still in the shitter. Only real new thing now is that I am going to be deployed to Afghanistan in June. So to those few who appreciate my work don't expect much over the coming year because I'll be trekking thru poppy fields and over the Hindu-Kush looking for terrorists.

--NOTHING FOLLOWS--

Things have become rather low as of late. I've graduated AIT and after a few weeks being back home in Oklahoma I've returned to Phoenix to start up life again. I have to admit it's not as easy as it was the first time. After getting out of active duty on to reserve status has been more of a challenge than I have thought. Adapting back to the regular way of things after being in the regimented life of the Arny for months has left me feeling somewhat lost. Worrying about getting a job and how I'm suppose to pay for school and whether to keep going to school has left me feeling somewhat depressed as of late. Sometimes I think that I should have stayed active where I would be on some fort somewhere and have to worry about where I would live or about a paycheck. Not to mention also my work with the Community here. I've been trying to get a formal organization up and running here as well as the eventual convention. I've committed myself to the Revolution and to uplift the Furry Community here, but I have been finding it hard to adhere to ideas when there's rent that needs to be paid.

Well I've managed to graduate Army basic and now I'm back in Arizona at Ft Huachuca going to Advanced Individual training. Tho going to Ft. Sill was in my native state of Oklahoma, I'm glad to have gotten the hell out of there. The only really good thing about going to basic at Ft Sill was that it was only about an hour from home. On graduation day was able to be back home around 2 o'clock while eveyone else was still stuck there waiting for flights. I was also able to get my vehicle and drive it over here with my personal stuff like my huge desktop computer. Everyone in the bay is amazed by the fact that I have a PC with 5.1 surround sound in my wall locker. But alas I have been without internet since I left so hence why my page has been a bit vacent for the past few months. I've finally managed to borrow someone's laptop with one of those Verizon wireless things that's really damn expensive.

But anywas, basic really sucked. But then again basic is suppose to suck. But it esspecially pleasent sine I went during the winter. When you are in basic you spend a lot of the time out side and for anyone whose never been to Oklahoma it is VERY windy. And not that kind of pleasent cooling breezes like here in Siera Vista, but this constant hatefull blowing wind that just sapped every bit of effort and wormth from you. Everytime we were out side it was blowing 20+ mph winds. The worst thing was eat out side. Not only did you have sit in the dirt and eat cold eggs and french toast, but in the middle of a field with no wind break while dirt and dead grass get blown in your food. I ate so much damn dirt and grass that it became a part of my diet. We would also have to stand around and wait in the wind and cold such as when we went to the shooting range. Since that class was full with about 240 recruits, when ever we whent on a training even such as at the range we would have to wait for hours outside waiting for our turn just to go shoot for about 20 minutes and then go wait longer for the rest of the battery to finish. And out there on the plains of sounther Oklahoma there are no trees or anything to block the wind. It's just a constant expanse of endless grass and dirt till the horizon. And since I was the only other one in my platoon from Oklahoma (the other being from Tulsa) every one blamed me for the horrible weather. Most people in 1st platoon were ether from the deep south or California where there aren't any winthers. Eventually I was able to pick up a sense for the weather since I was used to it and everyone would ask me for a prediction of what the weather would be. I kept telling them that it was a mild winter and once getting here and talking to people who whent to basic at other bases such as Ft Jackson or Ft Knox it was a lot worse. It didn't even snow and barely rained. Tho near the end while we were bak at the FOB (forward observation base) it torrentially raind for 2 days and we got to go back a day early since some of the tents actually flooded. And god did being at the FOB suck. Living in tents for 8 days always being dirty and about 50 soldiers from our battery got dissentary from the port-o-johns. It was really lovely durring one formation soldiers kept having to fallout to go puke in the grass.

Anyways, it's all over and thank yahwah. AIT so much different from basic I'm able to ware civilian clothes, drive my car and every weekend me and my buddies from basic go out to Siera Vista and have a good time at Paul's Pub. The upcoming Memorial Day weekend I plan to go up to Phoenix and see all my good old friends there.

Well this is it, I'm shipping off to Ft Sill (which is about an hour from where I live) for basic training tomorrow. Soon I will no longer be just the People's Commissar, but Private First Class. It's going to be about 9 weeks so don't expect any new submissions from me for a while.

Wish me luck, comrades!

After my return from Phoenix back to Oklahoma, I was looking forward to spending time home with family and friends. My time in Phoenix was a good experience, tho I may not say a whole lot about the city itself and even less about the weather, but as far as the Furry Community there I have nothing but high praise. I shall miss spending many a time playing Geometry Wars and watching B movies at Narse's Apartment- http://www.furaffinity.net/user/narse/ -from his vast cinema collection till the wee hours of the morn. And yes, Narse, I finally see Jeffery Combs as the genius you so praise him to be.

I shall miss hanging out with my good buddies Sohjin, Streak, Badger, Kat, Kamo, I'll even miss being constantly groped by Pokeyponey. and all the others. I shall miss hanging out at the International House of Pancakes till 2 in the AM while inappropriately mixing the syrups into various concoctions and daring each other to eat it. I shall miss it.

But I must move on to bigger things, career opportunities await for me and I must go for them. An so I took leave of my friends and comrades with the promise of returning and made the overnight venture back to Oklahoma. 1032 miles in 16 hours and 36 minutes with out stopping. Not happy. Once I got back and reconnected with my old associates in the Community here and compared it to the Community back in Phoenix and I found it to be somewhat lacking. I spent much of my time with my friends in the Community, here I don't really have anyone to hang out with and spend most of my time vegetating while watching reruns of Star Trek: Voyager, and at a recent meet at the International House of Pancakes resulted in only 6 attending while in Phoenix the meets would regularly fill whole sections of restaurants.

But not to be too critical, there are good people and good friends here and I enjoyed seeing them again after being away for a year. I did, surprisingly, have fun at New Years. Me and 6 other Anthro Enthusiasts spent New Years sitting around a burning barrel consuming large amounts of alcohol and setting off fireworks. Not only did we find out that Hot Damn is flammable, but also throwing M-80s at a shit-faced drunk can be quite entertaining.

I guess the holidays are over with now and soon so also is my vacation. I go to Army Basic in a week and I am looking forward to it. Soon I will no longer be a mere civilian but Private First Class Dowds. I think it'll be an interesting experience and I plan on illustrating my experiences as a furry in the military.