It’s easy to get stuck on “callout documents are deeply unreliable both in framing and whether the stuff inside is actually true” as the main criticism of the culture surrounding them, but it’s also important to point out that even in cases where everything in the document is true, the mass harassment that results from these things circulating is effectively a dice roll ranging from “gets criticized loudly for a while and then nothing else happens” and “found dead” in terms of outcomes, with marginalization increasing the chance of a more severe result.
That’s not justice, that’s basically a worse form of trial by combat.
Like it’s pretty obvious a lot of you think the problems with cops go away if the person they’re catching definitely actually did it
People have been getting a bit parasocial so I think I need to say this:
I am your friend. I know you. You know me. This blog represents my whole complete true self. We are best friends. I love you. I want you carnally, as a friend. Thank you. You mean so much to me as an individual. You aren’t a number. Send me money
a good conversation tip is that when you initiate a conversation or a topic within a conversation, you are implicitly Casting the other person in a role–they’ll have had or observed similar interactions in the past and understand this even if not consciously. like the simplest example of this is that if you say ‘knock knock’, the other person knows they’re meant to say ‘who’s there?’. this is why intense self-deprecation is a shitty social move, because you are casting your conversational partner in one of two roles: Guy Who Argues With You, which is inherently a tiring role to be put in, especially on the regular, or worse, Guy Who Agrees That You Suck Because They’ve Always Secretly Hated You, which nobody wants to be. verbally self-flagellating isn’t bad social form because it’s wrong to express symptoms of mental illness, it’s bad because unless you are careful you end up implicitly offering the people youre talking to a whip they dont want
hold on let me try to invent a version of myself who can get us out of this mess [holds really still for a minute and a half and then turns to you with a flat affect] we probably should have killed ourselves an hour ago
unfortunately very true. Doing Better does not always mean never being upset or never being triggered or never having trouble. often Doing Better means experiencing those things and being able to keep going/cope healthily/move on. if you’re in a bubble with no sensation, if you’re numbing yourself out, that’s not what recovering really is. it won’t help you have a happier life it’ll just make your world smaller and smaller until you can’t fit anywhere anymore. gotta learn to make peace with the hard stuff too, that’s the only way to keep going
