Laughsassin lore ramble
As part of an art trade with @amar-art ! I don’t have much spoons for actual writing these day, but here you are! I hope you like it <3 !
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On the highest peak of Alternia lays the Temple of the Laughing Gods. The temple sits at the exact center of the mountain range, with jagged peaks that lurch towards the temple like a crooked grin or splayed ribs. Intense winds pass over these cliffs, causing the eerie tokens and trophies of kills to rattle and chime.
A monastery to the Mirthful Messiahs, the Temple of the Laughing Gods acts as the training grounds for the Laughsassins of the troll homeworld. While the empire does span the stars, and has thousands of laughassassin temples, the Temple of the Laughing Gods is widely recognized as the superior academy for all acrobatic and assassination arts.
The acolytes of the temple enjoy the closest thing any troll will experience to family, the communal cult of the Laughing Gods. Laughsassins from this temple are not made, they are born, carefully selected lineages of their elders, all the graduates that came before, and the few exemplary figures that have managed to join the cult later in life. This group is known simply as the Troupe. Bonds forged in the troupe are considered for life, a kinship to rattle the stars themselves.
As a result, the laughsassins operate in small units, commonly referred to as Acts. As laughsassins are raised they will develop their acts among the members of the troupe, forming various units and taking on different skills and roles to fill out various acts. The laughsassins pride themselves on a variety of talent and the generally confusing doublespeak/obfuscated nature of their ways and beliefs. No laughsassin is permitted to be a one trick pony. They are taught, brutally and forcefully, to adapt.
At the temple it is not enough to be funny you have to be sharp, quick witted. It isn’t enough to have a set routine; you must constantly up the ante. According to their doctrine they entertain their twin gods with acts of wanton violence and chaos. They are mortified at the thought of their underperforming or worse, becoming stale. The laughsassins train religiously (literally) to avoid this.
Some training practices include:
- Large scale unrest. Inciting riots and fear (with a smile, of course). These exercises of terrorizing cities and towns at the expense of lowbloods has created the phrase “the circus is in town” as a term for ill omen or impending doom.
- Walking across the tightropes strung across their temple’s mountain range. The already dizzying heights are made worse by the blustering, chilling winds and the assortment of trophies strung up. The bodies of those who fail are left to help feed the lusii of the temple
- Poison bakeoffs wherein students are expected to create a dozen or more candies, pastries, or other foods with poison baked in. The other students must then taste test and grade the others. This tradition allows the laughsassins to build up an immunity to poison as well as a sense for it. Many develop a minor craving for poison. Again, the bodies of those who fail are fed to the lusii.
- Surviving in the Ball Pit of Horrors. The pit is a colossal cavern. Approximately half of the balls in it are monster eggs. Each sweep recruits are left there for 24 hours. Those that emerge are haunted by the spawn of the pit. Few are willing to talk about it
- Hunts through the maze of mirrors, where the slowest and weakest of the laughsassins (or any troll they capture) is hunted for sport
