A Summary Of The Transformers Franchise
Generation One Cartoon: A four season long shitpost. Really wants you to buy some toys.
Transformers The Movie: All My Friends Are Dead The Movie. Featuring a musical score by somebody with a serious hard-on for rock music.
Marvel Comic: A grand cosmic adventure spanning thousands of years and tackling themes of morality and faith, interspersed with the goofiest shit imaginable.
Headmasters: Only notable for the terrible dub. Fortress Maximus has come himself.
Masterforce: Things go off the rails. Wishes it was a Gundam show.
Victory: Things go back to normal. Starring BURNING JUSTICE. Probably the best of the animes.
Zone: A yaoi anime posing as Transformers. An utter enigma. Probably would’ve been hilarious if it got past the first episode.
Generation Two: The one everybody forgets. Contains dangerous amounts of 80’s and terrible rap music.
Beast Wars: The Transformers become furries in order to survive in the time of cavemen. Somehow manages to be awesome despite a bizarre premise.
Beast Machines: Also known as “Why You Don’t Fix Things That Aren’t Broken”.
Robots In Disguise: That guy at work who you don’t hate, but you don’t exactly like him either. Starring a shark that does poetry.
Armada: A wacky scavenger hunt for Pokémon leads to the deaths of hundreds. Everybody keeps forgetting everybody else’s names for some reason.
Energon: The screw-up the rest of the family hates. You expected nothing and you were still disappointed. Has weirdly good music.
Cybertron: Unexpectedly good. Doesn’t get as much respect as it probably should.
Dreamwave Comics: Professionally published fan fiction. Everyone pretends they never liked it to save face. All the characters have the Ctrl-Alt-Delete face.
IDW Comics: Professionally published fan fiction, except it’s actually good this time. Won’t stop until every character is gay.
Kiss Players: The actual WORST. Embodies every horrible stereotype about Japanese media. You’ll probably get arrested if you read it in public.
Bayverse: The red-headed stepchild. Makes a ton of money but is so obnoxious everyone else ignores it.
Animated: Was too good for this sinful world. More anime than the actual animes. Inspires a lot of really weird fanfics.
Transformers Prime: What Bayverse would’ve been if it was competently made. Dwayne Johnson is in the first episode for no readily apparent reason.
“For Cybertron” Games: The only video games in the franchise even worth mentioning. Gears Of War with robots.
Rescue Bots: Pure and innocent in every way.
Robots In Disguise: Has nothing to do with the first “RID”. Ostensibly a sequel to Prime, but feels like it didn’t really want to be one.
Combiner Wars Cartoon: A total shitshow.
