thunderbolts on a cruise aka thunderBOATS
idk val’s making them do one of those things where people pay money to cruise with a podcaster/musician/celebrity except it’s her ragtag team of kind-of avengers
- ava loves the shows and never misses one. her favorite is the ice skating show and all of the comedians. always gets at least two desserts at dinner. buys a comically large floppy sunhat and lays out on a lounge chair for hours. hangs a whiteboard outside of her and yelena's cabin and writes a different question for passerby every day. wins every prize in the arcade and is so good at slot machines that john's convinced she learned how to cheat somehow.
- john commandeers the hot tub for longer than recommended. he finds one drink he likes from the bar specials and is legitimately never seen without one. lives in board shorts and slides. eats shit on the waverunner machine ONCE (yelena has it on video) and is the best on the boat every other time. little kids come watch him and ask for autographs after, they don't know or care who us agent is, to them he's the waverunner king. him and bob get nominated for the love and marriage game show as a gag and they win.
- alexei tips everyone. the towel guy, the lifeguard, his waiters each night, the people who clean his and bucky’s stateroom (they leave increasingly complicated and beautiful towel animals, which alexei adores and takes millions of pictures of), and every single bartender. they love him and don’t mind when he clears out the buffet. he wins the bellyflop AND cannonball contests.
- yelena hides ducks in impossible places. she sharpies an asterisk on the bottom of hers and people are still finding asterisk ducks on the ship for weeks afterwards. she’s also very good at finding them and the stateroom she shares with ava are full of them. is always on the rock climbing wall. loves dressing up fancy for dinner and takes a photo with bob on her balcony every night. gets the strangest mix of food from the buffet and makes people try combinations.
- bucky pays for the wifi package so he can talk to sam. sam doesn’t really have time to talk to him. he spends a lot of time on the top deck watching the waves. eats the cafe out of coconut cookies. makes friends with all of the wait staff and hears about any and all crew drama. brings a very hefty fantasy novel onboard and gets very into it. is a big fan of the hot tub but makes sure he's in the one directly opposite john so he can glare at him across the ship instead of just joining him.
- bob wanders the ship at all times of the day or night. loves watching the waves and spots enough wildlife that john accuses him of lying ("there's no way you saw a WHALE and i didn't"). hits the spa and finds out he hates his legs being touched and loves hot towels. double fists tiny ice cream cones. somehow becomes a judge for the bellyflop contest. buys matching hawaiian print shirts for him and alexei. knows where all of yelena's ducks are.
the cruise line ends up losing money somehow. val is left with a PR nightmare to figure out. approximately one million tickets are sold for the next thunderbolts cruise
i like imagining that it feels good as fuck to be multiple raindrops sliding down a windowpane and then combining when you touch. that's gotta be so nice.
There are truly very few forces in the world as strong as the inertia of staying up way too late doing fuckall
smash or pass ⚡︎ masterlist
athlete!au · bucky barnes x f!reader
bucky barnes is smug and prodigious. you’re trying your best under too much pressure. (un)fortunately, the only place the two of you can get along is in the bedroom. so how the hell are you supposed to bring home gold when he becomes your doubles partner?
🎟️ SERIES WARNINGS/TAGS: explicit sexual themes and smut, MDNI!; RIVALS WITH BENEFITS TO LOVERS; athlete!au (badminton); emotional slowburn; yearning; contains themes of golden child syndrome/perfectionism; secret relationship and even more secret feelings; mentions of romanogers and winterwidow
🌸 READER WARNINGS/TAGS: afab!reader; reader has hair and is able-bodied; mentions of reader's parent
🎀 CHAPTERS word count: 22.1k 🎉 completed 12/27/2025
⚡︎ part 1 ⏱️ time spent: 13 hours
⚡︎ part 2 ⏱️ time spent: 14 hours
⚡︎ part 3 ⏱️ time spent: 13 grueling hours
⚡︎ part 4 ⏱️ time spent: 12 hours
⚡︎ bonus round ᯓ to be confirmed
SMASH 💥 that follow button and comment to be on the taglist!
Unfortunately my problem is that I have no real ambitions I just want to live in my head
i’m doing it for the plot (creating a beautiful life for myself no matter the cost)
I'm curious. Tag this with your sexuality and what your favorite M/F ship is.
so. stranger things 5 was bad actually
like. randomly making holly a main in the LAST SEASON??? the random sudden tie-ins to a wrinkle in time??? the willmike best friend scene??? the jancy melting room scene (great acting terrible plotline)??? the final vecna battle??? the ending montage??? THE ELEVEN THING??? the pure chatgpt half-assery!!!!
save a horse…
Bronco Rider! Bucky Barnes x Trick Rider! Reader
summary: Bucky Barnes, your first love, your first heartbreak, your first everything… Ten years of no contact and he still makes your thighs clench tighter than anything you could do on the saddle.
warnings: exes to lovers, hurt (with copious comfort), flashbacks, gratuitous use of italics, cigarettes, horses, bad accents, fucking in a truck, oral (fem! receiving), unprotected p in v, breeding kink, cowboy hat, soft sweet sex, animalistic and reclaiming sex (the duality of woman)
psa (pink service announcement): this is apart of my dear friend @artficlly spin the trope event! I pulled ranch hand and athlete au! and fell inlove with both. this took me forever simply because I couldn’t get enough of them. anyway, love you bestie!!!
dt: @houseofhyde for letting me borrow the name Dexter 🤎 @artficlly for giving me new and exciting ways to make cowboy smut 🤠 @unificsation for being so generous with your time and brain. and of course @chateaubarnes for the brilliant flashback mechanism. this one rlly was a group project and I love you all to the moon and back
word count: 7.2k
"Go ahead Baby." Bucky coos. "C'mon fall apart on my cock how you used too." Your breath catches. "The way you're gonna the rest of our lives."
someone tell me why this is the most romantic thing ive ever read
I wish I could tell you why all I can tell you is that I would FOLD
They gon make a Defunctland video on my pussy at this rate
Oh damn it actually happened