them: you better not be gay wolf when i come over
my gay wolf ass:
Reblogged myhaireatskids
i bet scratching your neck with your little foot feels good as fuck if you're a cat
Reblogged myhaireatskids
puppies333303-deactivated201410
windows please im in the middle of something
Reblogged
listen to tom cardy, he has a variety of song topics including
- say hello to this business man! he’s not a cop don’t worry
- santa’s elves unionise the north pole (surprise, that’s two songs!)
- the one location you should tell someone to check whenever they lose an item of any type
- fiendish outlaw who uses no guns and defeats his enemies by flipping the bird at people, including baristas who overcharge him for a cappucino and people who bring soda water to his birthday dinner
- some vampires get bored so they all become flautists who have perfected the art of Embouchure
- a dog at a party- no wait now we’re on the wikipedia of the Vatican
- mario’s existential crisis
- pluto learned to stop doubting itself so you should too!
- and finally, what is this girl’s favourite film? the answer will surprise you!
Ooh, OP, don't forget other topics he covers like:
- Let's make fruit salad
- Existential crisis couched in the language of deleting the ladder in The Sims
- Robot cannot become human unless it understands why people send unsolicited dick pics
- The plot of the Fellowship of the Ring as told in how much walking they do
- Gonna order the Big Breakfast
- Conquer your fear of conflict by becoming Louis Theroux (literally)
- Do A Little Something To Make Your World Nicer
- High five me or I'll ruin your life
- Flirting with your dad
• Spacetime! Gravity! Champagne! Reality!
- Being somewhere you don't work, having a customer/guest approach and boss you around like you're an employee, and responding "Obviously, I don't work here, but even if I DID I wouldn't help you, ya jerk"
- Having Brian David Gilbert as a therapist and the two falling in love with each others' weirdass brains work via inkblot tests
- All the mugs in the apartment are in my room and in my car and I am painfully ashamed
- You have definitely met this kind of D&D player before
Reblogged inkly-heart
Reblogged
when I was like 14 I used to reblog these posts on here that were like "YOUR 20S ARE NOT AN IMAGINARY RACE YOURE DOING JUST FINE!!" just to be positive towards my older mutuals even though i didn't really get what they were about and I'd be in the tags like "#so true!! #everyone does things at their own pace!!" and now im 24 I'm thinking back to it and it's like Oh of course the imaginary race. Which im losing
#people my age own property and i still have to deal with my mommy cooking me my least favourite food for dinner something went wrong here#<- prev tags#i feel that so much op#like what the fuck do you mean i know someone younger than me who already has TWO WHOLE ASS KIDS#already married already delving into a career#are they crazy or am i the one who fucked up somewhere somehow
Reblogged reynaruina
Miniature di Mara Swelt
Reblogged paradoxgavel
Reblogged myhaireatskids
May I present to you: the least to most specific movie night ever, ranked.
Reblogged myhaireatskids
"Try our ai-powered-" and I've stopped reading. You've instantly lost me. I don't trust anything that labels itself ai-powered. I'd rather deal with something that's squirrel-powered. Like Norm. I trust Norm. He won't try to sell my data.
at some point in your life you will be boiling fruit, water, sugar, and lemon juice in a pot to make a syrup or jam. the instructions will tell you to simmer for a certain amt of time. your timer will go off and you will look at the pot and go, "hm, this doesn't look thick enough. maybe i'll let it go for another 10 minutes." this is the devil speaking. it's only so liquid right now because it is at boiling point. it will thicken when it cools down. learn from the follies of my youth and do not let this happen to you
at some point in your life you will be making a sauce or a stew in which you need to add cornstarch to thicken it. and you will prepare a slurry of starch in cold water and think "this looks like way too little starch to thicken this amount of liquid." this is the devil speaking. cornstarch instantly polymerizes at 95°C and if you add too much it will turn into an impossibly thick goop.
Reblogged ne0nbreeze
FUCK it was in parallel australia
Reblogged princiere
I love thinking I'm a hater and then meeting a real hater and going wow that does not look fun actually. Going back to my lukewarm hater ways. Performative haterdom. I couldn't name five hater bands.
