… the worst bit is I know several people this could be, especially given the ‘in Australia’ clarification
If you know them then there’s a chance I might know some of them and that thought will keep me up at night.
This wasn’t the guy who we all know who used to spray his jeans with Mortein and then light himself on fire, was it?
He used to sit at the back of the bus, cup his hand, spray deodorant into it, then open it and light it on fire with a lighter in one fell swoop to try and impress girls.
He had to stop because the bus company begged our school to tell him to stop bc of legal liability. His hands never actually got damaged after doing it for about a year.
I reached out to my old friend in question here, because I’ve been thinking about him all day.
I do not know what “the amulet” is. I have no idea what “the amulet” is referring to.
I instantly remembered when he said that.
While we were all at the local park doing legal things that teenagers would do back in the late 2000s, my friend here found a rock at our old smoke spot that was unusually smooth and flat. He liked it so much that he took it to the woodwork classrooms at school, drilled a hole in it, and hung it on a necklace.
When we asked why he weanwearing this dinky-ass pebble on his neck, he claimed it prevented him from ever getting food-related illnesses: wouldn’t get food poisoning, couldn’t over-eat, was able to ingest anything (prior to him finding The Amulet, a few of us used to play a game called “Devil’s Piss” where we would take turns shoving random food bits into a bottle of coke, and the first person to take a sip would get two dollars from the other players).
When we all asked him for the proof that this rock is magical—because nobody believed him, obviously—he said to meet him behind the History block at lunch, where he said he would drink two litres (or half a gallon) of milk in one go and not puke.
We met him there, and about ten of us all watched him down a whole bottle of strawberry milk in two or three breaths.
He didn’t puke.
He jumped up and down and punched his stomach to prove it.
He still didn’t puke.
I’m so glad I’m alive.
Reblogged from fighter-pilot-yuri | Originally from virtualgirladvance
alixw22x liked this
inkyshark reblogged this from markingatlightspeed
inkyshark liked this montgomeryward liked this
innanebob liked this captaingratedcheese liked this
firstclassshipping reblogged this from botanicallyinclinednerd
sortofshea liked this
tineid liked this
purple-hades reblogged this from hypertinypeeweealchemist
purple-hades liked this
certainconnoisseurheart liked this
ace-of-hats liked this jessixaluci reblogged this from dewitty1
jessixaluci liked this
sunbrightprince reblogged this from akaanir-of-starfleet
fractalexplanations reblogged this from do-you-have-a-flag
hypertinypeeweealchemist reblogged this from botanicallyinclinednerd
hypertinypeeweealchemist liked this
hotramen-jkhotmess liked this
eurosstuffz liked this
communist-shark liked this thoroughlysaucedsparrow liked this
saturniidae-served-cold reblogged this from scenicphoenix
saturniidae-served-cold liked this
dilis1634 liked this countdowntodoomsday reblogged this from acidmatze
bootyliquor9000 reblogged this from astralcurses
bootyliquor9000 liked this
deepgreenhorror liked this
sublimerascal liked this confettiandcoffeestains liked this
korixae reblogged this from astralcurses
korixae liked this
thatwasfunnypleaselaugh reblogged this from what-even-is-thiss
akaanir-of-starfleet reblogged this from doctors-star
flamingspud reblogged this from caffeineracoon
flamingspud liked this bisexual-caleb-widogast liked this
owo778-yumehoshi liked this astralcurses reblogged this from luxaii
astralcurses liked this
peanut-with-wifi-access reblogged this from fluffypotatey
honourablefool reblogged this from luxaii
peanut-with-wifi-access liked this
oblitusrex reblogged this from weissroseschnee
oblitusrex liked this
luxaii reblogged this from acidmatze
virtualgirladvance posted this
- Show more notes





