Living Other Lives

makingsenseofwhathappened:

“Trauma is not what happens to us, but what we hold inside in the absence of an empathetic witness.”

-Bessel van der Kolk

I think the world mostly sees trauma as the bad thing that happens to you in the moment – the headlining event of pain.

But to me, life is more a tumbling sequence of smaller moments, the real damage being what follows when no one sticks around to see what the main event did to you.

Or turned you into.

In light of that, I’d like to recommend The Body Keeps the Score where van der Kolk vividly dissects how pain lives in and pummels the body until someone finally bears witness to what happened.

His work has reconfigured my understanding of healing, which really does start, I think, with being believed. By others if you’re lucky, or by yourself at the very least if you’re not.

TL;DR: It’s incredible how much you lose waiting to be believed.

😱🥰

galafanxy:

Winteragent is the perfect ship for an angsty plot that involves lots of hate-fucking.

They would start to fuck as a consequence of John running his mouth and Bucky going “Do you ever shut the fuck up?”, the next thing you know is they are fucking raw and someone gets his lips bitten too hard.

They keep sleeping together. They probably talk about it by the fourth time they fuck, they agree it’s convenient and decide to keep doing it as long as it doesn’t get in the way with work.

If one of them gets horny, they go to the other. The whole complicated fuck buddies except they are not actually buddies because they don’t like each other much, so there’s also the going to the other when there’s pent-up energy and going full “I know you can take” for the rough sex they are about to have (you know, since they are super soldiers and there’s not hate-fucking without rough sex). In their agreement they probably get to discover each other’s likes and things they didn’t know they liked since they get to experiment and with time they are cocky enough to ask for new things.

Everything is normal, they continue to behave the same way, nothing changes. No one notices. All cool.

Eventually things start to shift. They get along better outside their sexual agreement, they are in sync, they start to be friendly with each other.

There’s this moment of realization when they figure out the other isn’t as bad as he thought it was. They encounters are less rough, less hurried, less hate-fucking and more caring for the other’s pleasure.

And then the accident happens. One of them has to get badly hurt or have a close call for one of them to realize they are catching feelings (my fave here for that would be John).

That’s when the angst starts and it’s all the one who is catching feeling continuing their agreement even though it’s hurting him.

Of course he’s going to hide it because there’s no way the other feels the same way. It’s complicated (or not).

:)

Have you read: know you got my blood running by six_demon_bag on AO3?

micahulrichdraws:

LAST CALL ON THE WEEKEND DEAL - “The Creation” and “The Last Supper”. More details at the link in my bio.

Two Dots game had the fsm on their Halloween scavenger hunt.

onegeektorulethemall:

Most people would be too embarrassed to have their Lord and Savor on their blog.

Reblog if you are part of the 1% who aren’t.

R'amen

inkedinred:

▲ Flying Spaghetti Monster ▲

Completed this unique tattoo commission and got a photo of the completed piece from the client! It’s always fun to see the finished tattoo! Do we have any #pastafarians in our midst? 🍝🙏🏻✨

R'amen

coffeecatsandnaps:

I just want to see how many of us there is.

R'amen