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Rainy Days

@chlorine-and-petrichor

Just an account to reblog and save things I like πŸ™‚

the juxtaposition between Jason "I died in an explosion trying to save innocent civilians from Joker and my body was so battered Bruce could barely carry it out" Todd and Dick "I lightly fell on a tiny rock ever so slightly wrong and somehow managed to break my entire neck and die instantly before anyone could say anything" Grayson is...there's something to dig into there, but I can't quite put my finger on it

Bruce truly hates magic with every pump and beat of his heart.

What kinda curse is Slang, anyway?

β€œThis is the best day of my life.”

β€œBro really thought he ate with that.” Bruce physically feels a full body shiver, charged with nausea and cringe. β€œThis is level 10 cringe. Can’t have shit in Gotham.”

Dick is his earth bound angel, but he laughs like a demon at him, holding onto Jason for support, pledging his eternal loyalty to Zatana and her pettiness.

β€”

β€œHey, old bat, hook me up with an adrenaline shot.”

What he wants to say is Jay, do not try and fight with 6 bullets in your stomach.

What comes out instead, through Bruce’s grit teeth and intense, fierce glaring, β€œNot you trying to go back to your corpse era. See how I only took 2 shots? Very demure. Very mindful.”

Jason passes out from blood loss, but mostly laughter.

β€”

β€œChat, is this real?”

Stephanie barely bites back a full belly cackle. β€œI think he just asked us if we copied.”

β€œI wish I was Jason, 15.”

β€”

β€œThis is not a slay environment. Killing is flop behavior.” He keeps his eyes shut and buries his face in his hands. Trying to convince Damian not to stab someone doesn’t seem to work.

Damian gives him a pat like he’s a pitiful cat. β€œI’ll only stab the non lethal areas.”

β€œGod, I wish that were me.”

Bruce has a strict 'no metas/powers (except duke) allowed in Gotham' policy in place but it has a clause, BYOR (Bring Your Own Robin)

No one is allowed entry untill and unless they can produce their very own certified robin-shaped identity card

Whenever someone with even a hint of supernatural powers in them arrives at Gotham, they're first met with Bruce standing at the city border with a notepad in hand

Bruce: State your name and purpose.

Kon: Kon-el, here to hangout!

Bruce: Your Robin?

Kon, flourishing Tim from behind him: Ta-Da!

Tim, waves: Hey Bruce

Bruce: Approved, you may enter

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Hal: Here to investigate a case, Hal Jordan

Bruce: Your Robin?

Hal: I.... don't have one?

Bruce: Denied

Hal: What?! But-

Bruce: Denied.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Yes, Wally, where's your robin?

Wally: Oh shit lemme just- *zaps away and returns with Dick, who was in the midst of brushing his teeth, in a bridal carry*- Here!

Bruce, grumbling a little: Fine. Approved.

Dick: You gotta stop using me as a key already, man

Wally: Blame Bruce.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Bruce: Name and purpose?

Clark: Clark Kent, here for our monthly barbecue

Bruce: Robin?

Clark, producing an actual robin bird: Does this count?

Bruce:.....yes

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Tim: You know we actually found you in a sewer, right?
Damian: …what did you just say, Drake?
Tim: You heard me. Back then you were this slimy little tadpole. No arms, no legs , just vibes. Dick scooped you up in a bucket because, well... Jason wanted a pet.
Damian (on the verge of tears): Then… then how did I end up like this?
Tim (sighing dramatically): We may have, uh… injected you with some of Bruce’s DNA. Science, mutation, yada yada.
Damian suddenly bolts toward Bruce’s room.
The sounds that followed were Damian’s muffled sobs and Bruce’s voice filling the room with words like,
β€œNo, Tim’s talking nonsense! You’re my son , You’re definitely not from a sewer.
Dick (staring at Tim): He’s nine, Tim. Nine.
Tim smirks: Yeah yeah . But Always wanted a little sibling I could traumatize with that one.

Dick remembered a word to say when people are yelling!! man, I wonder where he learned that...

He does get very upset when he learns it's bad to say,, Bruce isn't mad of course he thinks it's hilarious

Instagram (social media in general tbh) is really starting to piss me off but I still want to share my art cause I love drawing and its fun and don't want my art to stay sitting in my art folder

Anyway here's Dick and Bruce (shockingly enough this one of his better parenting moves)

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