cigarburn:

you wanna sit on daddy’s lap and drive the car?

my piss fetish is lowkey ruinous. not really because it’s actually hard to accidentally permanently mess up your bladder… not that i’ve checked… but also it is bad to hold your piss for too long. stay safe out there everyone

rott1ingbonep1le:

This is how my posts look

berrytart:

I still like listening to we are young by fun.

dogpuppy:

jadenvargen:

Another devil’s minion commission by ezra for one of his fics :D

pjackk:

Ok but why are the suckers and losers trying to kill me today

sajjji:

truthnuke vs lying baby

i can give a fuck bout no hater long as my butches love me

yuriartillery:

hold on let me try to invent a version of myself who can get us out of this mess [holds really still for a minute and a half and then turns to you with a flat affect] we probably should have killed ourselves an hour ago