“i never see you at the club” ok well i never see you on ao3 at 2am reading about the same two bitches falling in love for the 1000th time in the 500th way

It snode :)

what is it that they say? a young man asks the sage why there are no longer dragons. the old man says "dragons are the same. something happened to your eyes"

a young man asks the sage why there are no longer dragons. the old man says "they're long enough."

(source)

How the hell could they get away with this

I recently found my “gold” hammer after misplacing it. It’s my favorite tool ever because it looks like a regular hammer trying to be fancy,

but then you twist both halves and unscrew it to find a flat-head screwdriver in the middle.

BUT, if you twist the very end and unscrew that

you find a phillips screwdriver.

BUT DON’T THINK THAT’S ALL THERE IS! THERE’S MORE!! unscrew the very end again to find a smaller flat-head screwdriver!

BUT THAT’S STILL NOT THE END!!

unscrew the end of this screwdriver to find a final, teeny tiny, flat-head screwdriver

look at how cute it is!

it’s like a matryoshka doll of tools.

I have one of these and I keep it in my IT toolkit because that teeny little screwdriver is the right side for laptop casings, but because it lives inside a large object it’s harder to misplace than a standard tiny screwdriver. Also because the look on a client’s face when you bring out a brass hammer to fix their laptop is absolutely wild.

we are gonna be vacuuming up this post for the next five years

So that’s how Star Trek TOS did some of their effects.

obligatory shitposting. inspired by this

Y'all have you seen this????

Appreciate the fashion and please don't look in the notes unless it's to find people who you want to block.

Shit is bad, but today, I learned that California's kelp forests have made a major comeback with the help of scientists, fishermen, and hammer wielding volunteers.

It's a win for habitat restoration. It's a win for marine life. It's a win for all of the people who helped make it happen.

It's a fucking win and it makes me happier than words can describe.

Edit: now with video and link.

Have you guys noticed how much the internet/technology just does not listen to you anymore? I click “don’t show this artist” on Spotify and I get recommended a music video by them on the front page. I click “skip this update” on a pop up every time I open a file organization app and it’s right back there every time. I click unsubscribe on a newsletter and it keeps showing up in my inbox!! I click “delete my account” and the next time I open the website they suggest I “reactivate”.

just some of the the changes in design for the Penguin Symbol on old Penguin Paperbacks 

he did a little dance and for this crime he was imprisoned in a bubble

They liked his little dance so much they gave him a spotlight

family album

as a smoker one of the fastest way i dissuade people from smoking is i go you know how your headaches suck. imagine a permanent headache that slowly gets more and more expensive to cure and also you cant stop coughing in the middle of all of this. yeah? this sucks.

i have said this before but end stage liver failure did not dissuade me from starting opiates. what dissuaded me was someone telling me "do you want to be itchy for the rest of your life? this is how you be itchy for the rest of your life."

people in the tags keep bringing things that are terminal, and i need you to understand some thing critical here. people do not conceptualise what they've not experienced properly and the 'inconvenient' side-effects come faster, and are far more likely than the Big Scary Ones. "dont start cocaine because your liver will fail" -- means nothing to me, have never experienced liver failure, also it takes forever for me to get to that stage. "do you want to know what cocaine shits are" -- paying attention, do not alter my shits habits.

I've enjoyed watching this post get a reblog here or there throughout the year and each time I think, "Whoops! Someone's queue just hit last March!"

But it's currently January and this is the top reblog in my notes at the moment. I didn't even know a queue could run 10 months long.

All this to say, you've got 2 months to get your Ides memes ready 🗡️

i like the genre of animal photos where you can tell they just dipped their face into a carcass and they dont even care (artistic interpretation)

sequel as a thank you for all the fucked up images everyone has sent

Ok, so I am now watching the full 18 minute video on YouTube and it's amazing.

Especially the line "I realised I have absolutely no idea how to teach an octopus piano."

I need everyone to see the update on Mattias' yt community tab

@crowscriven ocean creature for you

Concept: a mermaid who collects human artifacts, but, like, exclusively objects that humans have dramatically cast into the sea in moments of high emotion, catharsis, or personal revelation. Each item is carefully mounted above a little index card that outlines the circumstances of its hurling in terse, clinical prose.

How many outdated cellphones does she have from businessmen who realize that Family is more important?

Fewer than you’d think. For a variety of fascinating demographic and cultural reasons, importance-of-family cell phones are considerably more likely to be hurled into lakes than oceans. She’s co-authored a paper on the subject that’s due to be published next month.

I hope it’s been pier reviewed

Personality hire

Working Cats

Sometimes you really need a good personality on your staff.