God's court jester
-
I’ll never forget the time my parents said they were going out for a few hours, and left my siblings and me at home by ourselves (ages 9-14), and instead of going nuts or just sitting around, we all rushed and did our hair and makeup and got dressed as fancy as we could; sister pulled out the wine glasses and grape juice and made an hors d'oeuvres platter, another googled how to play poker, pulled out chips from a different game, dimmed the lights, and we set up a fancy 4-person gambling den at the kitchen table and played until my parents said they were on their way back with dinner. Then we quickly picked everything up, washed our faces, changed back into our casual clothes, and pretended nothing ever happened. They never found out.
(via squeakitties)
-
in 2026 DO NOT ask yourself whether your art is GOOD
instead ask:
- is it SINCERE
- was it CATHARTIC
- was it FUN TO MAKE
- is it MADE BY ME
and don’t forget to stay silly
(via shukruut)
-
the erasure of the rape element in mythological retellings is so heinous it borders on misogyny
it’s the idea that because rape as an act is misogyny, that talking about rape or including it in stories is also misogyny. as if acknowledging that women were denied agency and dignity somehow further denies us agency and dignity. when really, acknowledging the ways women were/are denied agency and dignity affirms that we are entitled to these things. a feminist story isn’t just a story in which no bad things happen to women. bad things do happen to women. pretending they don’t, and especially trying to superimpose that conviction onto the past, just because it isn’t as fun to dwell on, is not a feminist position.
(via weepylucifer)
-
“lezzing out” is basically one of the most noble activities one can do
And if you think you can’t lezz out because you’re “not a girl”, i promise you can be a girl
-
So many people never learned to live with harmless discomfort at any point in their lives and holy fuck does it show
“But I wanna know!” You’re gonna have to learn to be ok with not knowing some things, especially when those things involve personal details about strangers that they’re not comfortable sharing.
“But it’s confusing!” If you take the time to educate yourself it’ll no longer be confusing. Otherwise you’re just gonna have to learn to be ok with being confused.
“But it’s weird!” You probably do weird things all the time. Everyone does weird things sometimes. Life goes on.
“But it scares me!” Is it hurting you? No? You’ll be fine. Being scared and being harmed are not always the same thing. Learn to tell the difference and then act accordingly.
“But I want it!” And I want a million dollars. You can’t always get what you want.
A lot of people were also never told “no” as children and the consequences of that manifest in similar ways. Learn to be ok with being told “no.” You’re not gonna die if you don’t get your way in every single situation ever.
(via broomballkraken)
-
dry humping in its specificity as a term implies the existence of wet humping
not my best work
-
I bring sort of a ‘peasants of the past were not as debased,uneducated and dirty as a lot of pesudo-medieval fiction makes them out to be but this new wave of attempting to sweep the very real indentured servitude, corporal ownership, poverty and lack of basic human rights under the rug isn’t achieving what you think it’s achieving’ vibe to the party that people don’t really like
-
*creaky door noise* *bones noise* *spooky ghost moaning* *creaky door* *bong bubbling sound*
(via lakemojave)
-
do you want to see the best trail cam photo ever
let it be known he is chilling like crazy
(via cowboyfirestar)
-
Trying to inflict psychic damage to a tumblr user is like trying to irradiate a cockroach, like it can be done, but the lethal dose is not safe for humans either
Besides the point, but you could always try physical damage?
You’re right Gomez, bring me the flail
-
-
going2hell4everythingbutbeingbi:
my corner store guy is a 50 year old man who’s my best friend in the world and recently he was like “you’re too pretty to be single I have some nephews you should meet. very handsome!” and I was like “a niece might be more up my alley” and he just got more excited and said “ah even better! I was overselling my nephews but my nieces are very beautiful”
OP the tags!!
-
How to hack any hospital computer
-Use the password taped to the monitor
How to hack any hospital computer (L337 version for advanced security systems)
-Use the password taped to the back of the monitor
As a computer guy: This is what happens when you have too much security. It reaches a tipping point and then suddenly you have none.
Security at the cost of convenience comes at the cost of security.This is true of so many things in healthcare. Example: our software is designed to automatically alert the doctor if a patient’s vital signs are critically out of range. If someone has a blood pressure of 200/130, the doc gets a pop-up box that they have to acknowledge before doing anything else. It makes sense, in our setting.
But then some mega-genius upstairs realized something: the system was only alerting for critical vital signs, but not for all vital signs that could possibly be bad. Like, yeah, 200/130 is potentially life-threatening, but 130/90 is above ideal and can have negative effects on health. Should the doctors be allowed to just ignore something that could negatively affect a patient’s health? Heavens no!
So now the system generates a pop-up for any vital signs that are even slightly abnormal. A pressure of 120/80 (once considered textbook normal, now considered slightly high) will create the pop-up. We have increased our vigilance!
Well, no, what we’ve actually done is train doctors to click through a constant bombardment of pop-ups without looking. We’ve destroyed their vigilance and made it much easier for them to accidentally skim past life-threatening vital signs.
But you can’t tell that to management, because you’d have to confess that you are a flawed human with limited attention resources. They’d tell you “well, all the other doctors take every abnormal vital sign seriously, it sounds like you’re being negligent.” And if you’re smart, you back down before you start telling the big boss all about your habit of ignoring critical safety alerts.
The end result is exactly the same as if we had no alerts at all, except with more annoying clicking.
(via yellowsubiesdance)
-
“You could get up early and do it before work” I could also wait for a magic beanstalk to start growing in my living room LMAO. Let’s focus on things that happen in the real world
(via royalrevan)
-
i was going to be like “love being treated like a junkie at the target cvs” but then i remembered the concept of a junkie is a societal construct and there’s no hierarchy between a so called drug addict and a prescription drug user and i should instead join forces with my junkie brethren and storm the fucking cvs together. welcome to the harmacy
