WAITTTTTT STOP AND IMAGINE THIS WITH MEE
Sylus with a deaf baby girl
It took about a week before either of you knew anything was wrong. When you'd try to shake Sylus's keys to get her attention, or when he'd try to calm her loud cries as he changes her diaper
Completely deaf, the doctor said. Both of you had frowned at that. The mere thought that your baby couldn't hear anything, from Sylus's humming to your baby talk to the birds outside and the crow inside that likes to play with her rattle - nothing. Talks about when or if to get a cochlear implant, what schools she would have to go to, how she'd make friends and more
Sylus took to sign language like a fish to water. Always great at learning new languages, this wasn't much different. His signs are usually confident and calm, laid back, just like he is in business deals. He struggles to use his face to get the tone across, however. The teacher you both go to to learn has gotten onto him about it multiple times. And then says his "happy" or "excited" expressions seem too forced. He's practicing them now more than ever just so he doesn't risk scaring your baby
Both of you love signing to her now. Even during normal conversation, you'll be signing along for practice and she'll be watching with her big red eyes. The first time she ever "babbles" back at you both, Sylus nearly cries
But his favorite moments are these, while he's putting her to bed
She's so tiny. He cradles her in both hands even though he only needs one, holding her to his chest, high enough he can brush kisses to her head and the little tufts of hair sticking out of it
And he hums. He sings along to the music in his head or the phonograph playing down the hall. The vibrations rumble through her little body, soothing her slowly but surely to sleep. Sometimes he'll talk about the things he can't wait for her to experience. If she's still eligible, if she decides to get the implant, for her to hear everything for the first time. God he hopes she can, one day. There are so many sounds he'll stop and take in and imagine her reactions. A cow's moo. The crunch of grass. The acoustics of whistling in the bathroom. The breeze rustling the leaves in the trees
He repeats "I love you" over and over. Hoping she can recognize its pattern, its pacing. When she's trying to grab onto him, he'll make the sign with his hand, and she'll play with his fingers and thumb and he hopes she tries to mimic it once she gets better control of her fingers. He knows he'll cry then, too, when she starts making that sign at you both
Just thinking about it, he holds her a little bit tighter, resting his cheek on her soft little head to whisper it over and over, and over and over, while you watch from the doorway, trying not to choke on your tears
