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reblog to throw a brick at Jonas Venture Sr

never say with eleven words what you could with ten. do not use nine words where ten words will do. only ever write sentences that are exactly ten words long.

i swear to god you people really will reblog anything

Don't bait the hooks and criticise the fish for biting

Uhh I jerk off to goombas from super mario bros

i cant believe there are people who still havent seen this video

I could probably recite this entire video, word-for-word, on demand.

Goddamn, this is nearly thirty years old and it fits like a glove into contemporary shitpost cadence and aesthetics, this is High Art

IT BETTER NOT BOUNCE OR YOU’RE A DEAD MOTHERFUCKER

holy shit this was made the year i was born

ALWAYS REBLOG BIG BILL HELL’S CARS!

ADS THAT SUDDENLY TAKE UP THE WHOLE PAGE

ADS THAT SUDDENLY TAKE UP THE WHOLE PAGE AND PLAY MUSIC

What about ads that play music, but you can’t find them anywhere on the page?

Still hearing the ads music after you close the page

having adblock

Sites that forbid adblock

When ads pop up even when Adblock is enabled

When porn ads pop up unexpectedly

this post gets better everytime i see it

When you try get rid of the add really fast but accidentally click on the link that sends you to seventy different pages before you can go back.

THIS POST KEEPS GETTING BETTER

When the ad shows something you’re actually interested in.

When you have to wait to skip the ad

When the ad is about abused/animals needing homes

@extraordinaquari

I dub this post “The Legend of Advertisements”! 

when you get rid of the add but it keeps coming back.

It got better.

Making it my goal to reblog this once every day lol

When you get so many ads at once that the site you’re on crashes and you have to reload the page.

wHY IS THIS SO ACCURAT E

I found this amusing, so here you go.

When the ad asks why you want to get rid of it and won’t go away:

*hits it with shoulder*

When the X button is too darn small

oh sweet! that’s good to know

I love this because like 99% of this kind of paleoart is patriarchal Man the Hunter type fantasies but these guys are just like “fuck it we’re outta here”

we have not changed.

The Flight Before The Mammoth. Paul Jamin. 1885

Behind The Scenes Of National Geographic. Teodor Vladimorov, Brandon Smith. 2011. read more

The sushi-shaped isopod is a crustacean like no other.

(Image credit: Aquamarine Fukushima)

David Lynch, “The Angriest Dog in the World”

#dog

someone had to no one had to

Why do witches like always wanna fatten kids up before they eat them?? fat is like the grossest part of meat

“Why hello there, little children~. Please follow me to my magical… FITNESS ROOM. NO P A N S I E S ALLOWED BEYOND THIS POINT. LEAVE YOUR WHINING AT THE DOOR BECAUSE IT’S LEG DAY AND WE’RE ABOUT TO GET R-R-R-RIPPE D.”

Because they’re always cooking said kids in cauldrons and ovens - aka long cooking times at lowish heat. If you do that to fatty meat, the fat melts completely and the meat gets tear-it-apart-with-a-fork soft. If you do it to lean meat, you get tiny little sad meat bits that bring no joy to anyone.

well you did ask

Also there’s wisdom in fattening them up on sweets and other carbs. A meatless, carb-rich diet makes for more tender and flavourful meat.

you are arguing over the semantics of EATING CHILDREN

Well yeah, you gotta get this shit right or it’s a waste of 40-80 lbs of meat.

plus if you feed them a high fat, low nutrition diet, they’re easier to subdue and less likely to run away, which would be a concern for an elderly crone.

Thank you, Old Witch With Candy House side of tumblr.

Now THIS is a Tumblr heritage post.

I think this might actually be the originator of the “x side of tumblr” line?

:03 he has a nose

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

goat

i wanna talk about this shot

if forum signatures still existed this would be mine

God fucking damn it

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Unstrung: my modest collection of vintage Pinocchio imagery.