if i was trapped in the time loop i would do the correct sequence of actions to break out of the time loop on my first try, thus resulting in me unaware of there being a time loop in the first place

You keep saying this every time.

that's because you're stuck in the time loop so you hear me say it every time. i on the other hand, got out perfectly so i'm experiencing time linearly as normal

I think this is the loop where I kill you with a rock

i think one of these days mr beast is going to snap and go missing for a year. and they’re going to find him butt ass naked on the highway at 3:56 pm reciting video scripts to himself and then never be seen again and people will debate if it was real or not for decades

he will be found with his Little Beast out muttering to himself about dropping trains into holes and ten years later a man with sunken eyes and a dead expression who looks suspiciously like former World Influencer Mr beast will enter a bar in nowheresville, pennsylvania, and order a rye and coke. and a former gen alpha brain rot kid will look at him and go. “are you mr beast.” and the man will grimace a little. but he’ll go “no”. and he downs his drink in one go and spends the next 4 hours staring into the wood on the counter

everyone tried to curse of 10k notes this. unsuccessfully. sad!

How's it feels to be wrong

dude.

i knew a surgeon and he once told me “nobodys insides look like how the textbooks say they will. you never know what you’re going to find in there once you open them up” and that was easily the most ominous thing anyone’s ever said to me

when i was taking my first year anatomy lab, we’d occasionally find a cadaver where things would branch off or attach in the wrong order, and when we’d ask our prof about it, he’d just shrug and say “they must not have read the book”

When my friend was in med school one of the cadavers donated for them to autopsy didn't have a belly button, just smooth skin.

In the past 10 years of teaching in an anatomy lab, I have seen:

- A donor with a scrotum the size of my head. When we opened it up, we discovered it was a MASSIVE inguinal hernia and a good 1.5 ft of intestine were trapped down there.

- A donor with situs inversus totalis, whose organs were a mirror image of what we normally see (ie their heart pointed right and their liver was on the left, just for starters)

- A donor whose right common carotid artery branched off the aorta waaay over on the left hand side of the body and crossed alllll the way back across the thorax to get where it needed to be.

- A donor with 4 lobes for their right lung (should only be 3). We named the 4th lobe the Lisa Loeb, but all of the students were too young to appreciate our sparkling wit.

- A shocking variety of penile and breast implants. Y'all would not believe the number of different ways science has come up to counteract gravity.

- A couple of cases of ectopic kidneys, where a kidney didn't rise to its typical position just deep to the lowest ribs and instead stayed in the pelvis.

There is probably some other stuff that I am forgetting. Take home point is: the human body is weird and wonderful and you should learn more about yours!

....duuude.

Spleens Georg

14???????

My contribution: client co pinched nerve in L side of neck. I asked about health hx; she said, “I've got some extra ribs on that side.”

me: “some?” (!!!!!??!?!??!???)

Some was 2, but that’s crazy enough.

Yeah, I don't discover the anatomical weirdness but I've had clients come in with extra ribs, missing ribs, extra vertebra, accessory muscles (that's when you have duplicates - sometimes fine, sometimes not), bones connected where they shouldn't be (spoiler: if your lumbar spine is connected to your hip, it Causes Problems), all sorts of stuff. Bodies are weird!

More from the notes

This made me remember that I had a friend in high school who had one thumb that was like half an inch shorter than the other. Not sure how that happened.

even the things you never think about are a spectrum

i shine only with the light you gave me / nomad and aux

Arc Subclass effects on Arc Guardians

Again, mostly applies to Exo's, but this is now a sorta series.

Static electricity everywhere, clothes, weapons, armor, hair if they have it, and more. Arc guardians regularly wear tighter clothes to avoid weird clinginess of fabric and eventually it's just another part of life for them.

Electrical currents are drawn towards each other; similarly, arc guardians are drawn towards anything with a running current, to the point where many have formed jokes about checking the ceiling for stray arc guardians on light fixtures. It's unintentional but hilarious all the same, until you're in a firefight and your squishy arc warlock of a fireteam member is drifting towards that hive wizard.

Exo's in particular benefit from using arc as they don't need to charge as often or for as long as others, the arc energy flowing through them keeping them going for much longer than one would anticipate.

Patience is a virtue that most arc guardians haven't even heard of, constantly needing to be moving, with all the electricity they carry it's no wonder that they jump from one task to another like an undirected current.

I headcanon that...

Some Strand users can "hear" stand. The strings are like music they can trace and follow.

Not all guardians can "attune" to certain elements, and likewise some guardians can fully attune to their elements.

Strand is unique in the sense that attuning to it also let's you hear the web behind the scenes. Arc let's you feel currents. And for some you can almost see the wires that can conduct and are filled with electricity. Void users who can properly attune tend to be able to see shadows, echos of where people were. They make excellent trackers able to see where someone is not anymore. Solar users can follow heat sources. At full attunement its closer to Predator infrared vision. Stasis users, well they see in clarity, they see what makes up whatever they're studying. As if they peek behind the scenes to see the blueprint.

Thought to myself “hey, what are the aesthetics of the subclasses?” Then proceeded to create this

Solar: Straddling the fence between vigilante and outlaw. Justice. The gleam of a pistol in an old leather holster. The smell of oil. Passion. A table full of empty coffee cups. Rebellion, revolution buried deep inside a battered soul. A hood pulled tight, eyes low, piercing. Denial, deflection. The repetitive click of a firearm’s hammer. Easily misplaced trust. Gasoline coursing through veins in the place of blood.

Void: Air too thick to breathe. The shrill shnnnk of a knife being sharpened, echoing in the deafening silence from an unknown source. Exhaustion. Rage. The quiet, methodical fraying of the last remaining shred of sanity. A dangerous smile. A deep and insatiable craving. An internal kryptonite. A glare sharper than daggers. Eyes watching from the shadows. A muffled cry for help that nobody can hear.

Arc: Anticipation. Buzzing veins. Thriving, prospering only in chaos. Loud music thumping behind closed doors. The metallic smell of an old chemistry lab. Jubilation. Exhilaration. The crackling of broken comms. A thunderstorm, loud and strong, echoing from miles away. Raging rapids in a calm river. A battered helmet, thrown off in the heat of battle. An excess of energy begging to be released.

Stasis: A dusty violin that’s slightly out of tune. Echoes. The clinking of ice in a watered down glass of bourbon. A last resort. A new song, different than the last, but just as enchantingly beautiful. Mesmerizing. A long untouched book with stained pages. Swirly handwriting with a story hidden between its lines. Shattered glass. Resonance. Mystery. Frost settling in fingertips. Moonlight glimmering on snow covered peaks.

Strand: A knife hidden beneath layers of clothing. Addiction. A puppeteer thats never seen. A whisper in a dark alley, alluring, captivating, but eerie. A siren singing in the sea. Mesmerization. A dead tree standing in the center of a golden field. A starved soul receiving nourishment from something it shouldn’t. Poison. Acid rain in a desert. Falling in love with an enemy. Enjoying the pain, the fear, the dread, if only for a moment.

Effects of the void subclass on Guardians

I will say all of these mostly apply to Exo's as that's the kind of characters I've created and have not thought of other species.

Void is mesmerizing. Guardians who mainly use void pull people in despite attitudes or associations. By pulling people in, I mean literally. People unconsciously drift physically towards them while walking, and they get bumped into a lot. They often end up crowded, with nobody the wiser about why they are so close together.

Their eyes glow slightly purple in the dark and if you look closely the color swirls slowly like a vortex, if eyes are the window to the soul their soul is hypnotizing. Depending on the guardian they also claim to be able to see better in the dark, though that is untested and unproved.

They teeter on the edge of light and dark, often compared to living black holes, there is light there bright and burning as anything else but in the center, there is an endless, well, void. Guardians who rely mostly on void abilities found themselves more susceptible to the darkness when Stasis first began being taught. The connections they make with their allies anchors them in the light thankfully, meaning that the balance is kept between the two sides.

On a lighter note, void users are collectors, if a guardian uses void for a significant amount of time you can be certain that they have some sort of collection hidden away somewhere. Whether hoarding guns and armor like a dragon, or a small collection of trinkets like rocks, plants, and other small knickknacks from past missions!

took a break today and drew some memes pardon

just got the single funniest autocorrect from my mum a few minutes ago.

A goblin and an elf have decided to defy tradition and get married. Their ceremony will be held in the magical forest in accordance with elven tradition.

It's a beautiful ceremony. The elven bride in her finest, flowing silks, dappled by the sun. The goblin bride in a human-sized wedding dress stolen from a goodwill.

The elven side of the aisle of course has the elvish bride's father and mother, as well as her older sisters, as well as all the forest animals who inhabit her parents' court.

The goblin side is a bunch of The Labyrinth looking freaks in their best simulacrum of what they think good folks wear to weddings. The father of the bride is wearing a really snazzy cocktail dress.

It's a mixed tradition ceremony. The elven part of the ceremony involves the young couple being presented in front of the king of the forest, a majestic unicorn, who blesses the couple by touching them with his horn.

The goblins kidnapped a local priest to bless the couple according to their tradition.

The ring the elven bride presents to her wife-to-be is brought in by a squirrel riding a doe. It's made of silver, inlaid with decorative golden leaves.

The goblin worst man accidentally swallowed the ring, which was purchased from a pawn shop.

The father of the elven bride keeps looking over to the goblin side of the aisle, barely hiding his disgust. But he is resigned to it. What matters most is his daughter's happiness.

At the end of the ceremony his face sinks as the father of the goblin bride says "Welcome to the family! You can call me brother," while vigorously shaking his hand.

The reception is, of course, held at a speakeasy according to goblin tradition. The ceiling is only five feet tall, making it very difficult for the elves.

"An elf walks into a bar,"

"Will you please stop saying that!"

During the reception the father of the goblin bride, named Frankie the Third, decides to introduce his family to his new elven family.

"These are my older sisters, Frankie the First and Frankie the Second. No relation."

"What does that mean,"

#the father of the elven bride is absolutely disgusted by the goblin's dad#right up until he's got some of that good goblin ale in him and then they're both singing old shanties together#'i am amazed you know this one! it must be far older than you - we sang it hundreds of years ago!'#'yeah i ate some old musty book full of songs once and i think that was in there'#'...okay!'#they're superbowl dad buddies afterward

You understand my vision

My favorite bit is it sounds like @thydungeongal is there and they're live tweeting the wedding.

I love the implication that goblins are incredibly well-read because they keep eating pure information 📚

You should see my uncle who once ate a stack of porno mags

He ate them for the articles.

But he spit out all the nasty prepositions and gerunds.

"The goblin worst man accidentally swallowed the ring, which was purchased from a pawn shop." Riiiiiight. It was "purchased".

This is the priest's eighth goblin wedding. (There is some contention over whether one wedding counted as it became a race to finish the vows before the groom finished giving birth and it became a christening)

He is dumped out of the burlap sack and begins "We are gathered here today..." without hesitation. Two goblin children have to be restrained from running up and climbing him because he's their favorite god-uncle. The first time he was kidnapped he was terrified and had to be prodded (literally) to say the wedding vows to the happy couple. The second time he was kidnapped, he spent the entire time protesting that this didn't count and argued with the mother-in-law about what should be said and was repeatedly cowed into submission. The third wedding he was delirious from lack of sleep and when uncle drunkenly demanded he hurry up, the priest snapped and went into "fire and brimstone" mode declaring that a sacred union of love was not to be disrespected in such a way and incorporating it into his blessing upon the union before resigning himself to death. Unfortunately for him, the goblins loved it and he immediately became the most preferred priest in the region and was dragged into the community celebrations completely against his will. He pretends to pull a ring from behind the bride's ear to make up for the missing one, and sincerely tells the couple that he knows that they will be very happy together before he crowd surfs to the exit. Wild applause erupts.

I love everything about this.

I would like to know the responsibilities of the Worst Man

The Worst Man is a coveted position at all weddings ("Man" being a translation of the goblin person, of course, can be any species or gender) because it's so much fun. It's the Worst Man's job to break all the tension.

After one's spouse, determining your Worst Man is pretty much the most important choice for a wedding.

when i tell you i had an aneurysm

"Average canyon is full of arachnids" factoid actually just a statistical anomaly. Average canyon has a normal amount of arachnids. Spider Gorge-

tumblr has like 5 jokes that just get recycled.

it’s very efficient that way.

average tumblr user only knows five jokes factoid actually just statistical error. Spiders Georg-

Sections 553 and 554 of Article 27 of the Maryland Code prohibited sodomy (punishable with a sentence of “not less than one year nor more than ten years”), oral sex, and “any other unnatural or perverted sexual practice with any other person.”

Maryland’s law against sodomy was repealed in 2020.

and EXTREMELY well

NASA Data Sonification: Black Hole Remix

In this sonification of Perseus. the sound waves astronomers previously identified were extracted and made audible for the first time. The sound waves were extracted outward from the center. (source)

No, thank you. I did not need to hear the souls of a universe calling to me from the afterlife.

Someone needs to make a space thriller/horror/whatever with this mixed into the music

why does it sound exactly like what it feels like a black hole should sound like

my bones are scared now.

Love when this turns up on my dash.

@aestariiwilderness

Horrifying. I love it! Makes me think things for Danny Phantom fanon lore building things.

don't give up

makes me just think of this poem by Caitlin Seida

Maya released a terrifying screech, her jaw lowering farther than it should. "You. Cannot. Have. My. SACRIFICE!".

One of the most powerful scenes in Rhythm of War: Maya shouting her truth during Adolin's trial.

DO YOU KNOW THIS CHARACTER?

Somehow I doubt he's all of you.