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Please, I’m not ready to die! Sweep & mop, drag in the Chewy delivery, flatten the box, forget tomorrow is trash day, empty bags of litter sand (or lug them upstairs). The dishwasher opens & closes & opens & closes & opens again. Say goodbye to my insects. Grieve their slow fade. Cheer them on unbearably. Big things coming soon! Give Süki treats. Replenish the bird seed. Watch my littles feed. & they scurry as I open the back door to let Layla out to pee on the lawn I paid a Republican to mow.
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Radiating sparkles. Resting, maybe sleeping. Matter alive in a manner. Light’s made of you. I could read all of you through the oily layers of the eye. Lightning up the optic nerve. Animated. We look onto the far side of the aperture. Slip into a windsweep. Rays of my palms pointing fingers at your final location. Dear sweet backlit nerve-endings, I have sent you my protection in the form of God in the form of sleep & flying & some version of time. Rest in peace, you aching shelter. You may now devour the planet. Your first breath, free of compounds & grief, windswept & twitching & drinking from my birdbath. I hope this bug is a bunny is a bear radiating sparkles everywhere. A potential to have accelerated. The road to heaven is paved in none other than asphalt. I’d have held you in travel if I had known you before. I’m healing you from here. Not shaking. Not running, screaming. A retroactive process & a pre-birth perceiving. Getting sorted out & stronger & learning to see. One candle per body. Many of you get multiple candles. May as well light some for the rocks. I know you’re hopping around. Micro-forests of corpses & divinity. I hope you’re hopping around, my lovelies. I can’t wait to hop around with you one day when this is over. “X-ray of the spine.” “Imaging the teeth.” “Imaging the skeleton." “Phalanges.” “Inside the gall bladder.” “Interstellar mucus-producing cells.” “Humanity is now faced with a stark choice. Evolve, or die.”
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I seriously fucking promise to cry more than I scream! From now on! To just sit in that breeze & suck in my burnt blood. Emergence: A firey light slinking around a cavity. What I wouldn’t give to relax in the stomach’s mouth & turn into lovely loving love-goo. I spill them like I’m brave. The butterfly that I am. The butterfly that I am.
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I switched off an awareness of that bubble. I didn't think of my companion body double until I drove away packed in metal. It's like a dream I wake up from every morning. Into a new dream, I swim through struggling. Our love-making guiding rays travel through my covering at odd angles. It makes rainbows on my floor, but I have trouble feeling that it's the same sun who has always been there for me. The same moon pulsing insight from inside me. The same mountain who is me. The same reflection rooted in a cavity with a name that means virtually nothing.
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Keep this outside vision’s eyes. Pixel seeing. Little spies. Force field. Lens flare. I will rest nigh. White light speared. Rainbow light frizzled, burnt, smeared. Affirmations utter me. Singing sunray hash-fried glee. Aren’t I abundant? Aren’t I so safe? When there’s a warning, I’m safe & in danger. I’m safe from the danger.
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7. |
Thin Neck Of The Woods
03:33
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There is a place where the depths of God, the depths of hell, & the depths of the soul are the same.
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Labyrinthian EMDR
02:51
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I never knew this room was here. Key shielded behind the shields. Swept away. Little dive. Falling through hands that look like faces. Dusted downward in an oubliette. I can’t see the light here. I don’t even wanna see the light here. Why don’t I wanna see the light here?! A paint-splattered storm. A mind to forget about it in the lotus flower seeds & web-set glitter. What grows from mind is made for shame. Liberation transforms a broom closet. Light peaks when the mirror comes. False alarms script a world that’s dying, but the pain is just coming to a head. I see this light reflected in me, forcing me to reckon oblivions of births. Everything never processed. I never knew how.
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Every day fuzz around my ribs. 20 maybe 10 degrees. Slips of shhh coming through the little cleft so I can smell the lake. Ice friends enter. Dissipate with the cosmos in my red, blue, purple-leaning lights. There must be another, & another, & another breakfast spot. Sew my undergarments to this maze. Parking lots for geese.
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The cataclysm shield above. I stay wrapped up. I stay in bed. Who am I now? Am I dead? Please let me go back to live instead. I stared at the walls. I dreamt of a field. I bounced in the clouds. All before I healed. The power to be here now. A new earth to manifest. I’d like to be finished with this. Done, cozy, blissed, blessed. I’m the daybreak in a shipwreck. I’m a kitty in a window forever. I can feel my name in the hologram. I can trace it in the great book. I cannot utter it. I look out, looking downward. Skin on fire with a Moonpal heartbeat. I am willing to take a look. I am traveling down under until the depths & I are familiars.
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Army men eating toxic waste. Toxic waist. Listen to the geese. Listen to me: Liberty, guns, beer, & Trump. But I raise you this- Nonduality. Rather than kill me... Are you gonna kill me, man? Open the door to another dimension. Cryptic functions compute truth in lines of sight. There’s no removing the haze of photonic molecules from light. From soulless to solace, there’s no connection. No seed of being. No nodes. No auras. No right. Without us, literally the only-begotten one. The only fucking one! That’s us! I’d like to guide you into old age. I’d like to love you. It is time to melt into one another. No war! No war! No more! No war! No more! No war! No more! “It really felt like I was in a really, really expanded state. & I would say really boundless & being able to see things coming into shape & form & understanding them in a different way than I had before.”
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Slow crawling tearing. Let us zoom in. Photons dancing inside the thick flowing glowing glue. Stinging & sparkling cuts. It is happening again. It is happening again. The threads have never dissolved, but I remain protected. Propping my imagining eye open like fire in the sky. Running screaming from my mind. Grace just makes me face it. No forces, only spotlights. Grace just whispers from the field when the river is primordial & the surface quivers with pain. The soil is shifting in circles. Worms finding new thruways. Angel, take her hand. Let her lead you into the waters.
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Demons hungry. They want to feed. Oversoul can see they ache for pain. Love them by starving them. Watch them disappear. Interject agape. Flowy glowy sparkling veins; I feel them shrivel as they mirror. I’m thankful. I’m grateful. I’m hopeful in the snow. “No hope = no fear” but this hope could not be afraid. Be not afraid.
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Hawk-eye every evening’s moon. The liquid’s lights switch on. Please remember the trash goes out tonight. Spinning cold then spinning off. Whirlwind. Spinning cold then spinning off. Gardening nothing. Cozy constantly. Hiding in my path. Morphing feeling. Incessant beaming. No idea why.
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Fire-Toolz Chicago, Illinois
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