*speaks only in half sentences and leaves the rest to telepathy*
having feelings that contradict your morals is soooo fucking annnoooooyyyiiingggggg. can the emotions and logic department get on the same page im tired of having to like strangle myself into being a tolerable person
I would still use my turn signals in the Mad Max Wasteland. They'd call me "Signal" because I'd hit my blinker before ramming the enemy hot rods into the side of a desert ravine. I'd use my turn signal every time. They would respect me for this.
"That is Signal, the Last Follower of the Old Law."
It's the Bonclave (bird conclave) today in my backyard, to elect the Bope (bird pope). The cardinals are deep in discussion.
jokes to make after failure that aren’t self-deprecating:
- I’m the best to ever do it
- Nobody saw that (best if said loudly)
- No one’s ever done it like me
- I could be President/they should make me President
- Behold, a mere fraction of my power!
- The public wants to be me soooooo bad
- I’m an expert in (thing you just failed at)
- How could this have happened to god’s favorite princess?
- Nothing ibuprofen and a glass of water cant fix
- I’m being sabotaged
"I'll do it tomorrow" is not a decision, it's a wish
spose we're all feeping stupid today
my favorite coworker told me the scenario she thinks of to fall asleep is she stumbles upon a baby sheep and has to raise it and it grows up and she has to shear it and she says she envisions shearing it so carefully that she always falls asleep at that part
The Crushing Weight of Not Knowing If There Is a Task
as-if-and-only-if
im starting to think this crushing weight is not about the tasks
nothing online is ever truly deleted. except that one fucking thing you're looking for
