Charlie every time one of Bella's alliances suddenly changes:

so ummm welcome to my jar:) lemme show you around! theres some holes poked in the top so i can breathe, theres some leaves to munch on, and ive even got a twig! #mytwig

I love you jar fairy

If porn is still banned then how come I can post Sam giving it to gollum raw and wiggling?

I know most people are watching Pluribus like wow it’s Kim Wexler in my hivemind show but now I’m watching Better Call Saul like wow Carol Sturka in my lawyer show

Yeah sex is cool but have you ever been on tumblr before December 17 2018?

I think it’s funny how dogs behave guiltily after they do something they know was wrong but you can tell when your cat has done something terrible because they start slinking around like a bank robber.