Sorry I have been away for a while.

To put it mildly, I have been in a deep funk. A lot of little things that happened in March, and April that left me depressed and disappointed. In addition to giving me artist block. Anyone of the events or happenings by themselves would have been manageable, but it all came at me at once. I had been riding on a high, and then had my hooves kicked out from under me. So I withdrew and needed time to recuperate, and regain my confidence.

I am not going into the very long story or list of all that transpired in this post (maybe not at all here), I already vented over on my FB page in a drunken spew of hot mess. Which was very long, but also very vague and did nothing to really explain the finer points all that happened. Since my last posting here, I have had to compartmentalize my life. I have come to realize things about fursonas, and artist brands. Namely the longer you have had a name, and made that name associated with something (like art), and done that professionally for many years you can never truly separated your self from that.

Prince was a good example of this, with his whole Glyph thing. No one stopped calling him Prince, because he had made himself ingrained into a society with his huge body of work. Not saying that I have a huge body of work -or that I am as famous as Prince- but my old name is tied to my work (both in and out of the Furry community), and I often forget that fact. So for now, my professional name will be kept separate from my actual Fursona (This one). But I am babbling now...

Anyhow, the point of this post was to say that shit happened, I am sorry for being gone/in-active, that I feel my self confidence, energy, and creativity returning. Finally, that I am back. :)

Thank you for staying with me and your patience,
Brontey Blue

PonyPlay and TFF 2018...

I took my Pony Gear out for a stroll one night at the Con. I had an old friend and fursuit handler be my handler for this. Since my appearance is fully covered few if any who saw me knew who I was. The hotel staff was awesome, they wanted pics, and thought it was great! A few non-furs at the hotel also showed interest. The furs (my supposed people) gave me mostly a very cold reception. Other then a few who stared with a smile, I was generally avoided like I was a Leper, and I revived one very open snear of disgust, along with a few not so open ones. Later out of gear I was told by one fur that doing that sort of thing is NOT furry, does NOT belong at Fur Cons or in Furry, and I was NOT a Fur. I have to say it was the first time I have felt rejected by my people, by my community. Even my Handler mentioned that he never expected such reactions, or such a cold recepetion.

I was not expecting a fan fair, or ticker tape parade, or to be the center of attention but I was not expecting to have such a cold reception either. Last year there were several geared ponies like my self and a few geared pups too, at TFF. There was a Petplay panel (which I attended). It seemed like a friendly place for ponyplayers. This year, the few ponyplayers -that I know of- that were there didn't even bring their gear, or kept it hidden in their rooms. There were no pony/pup/pet play panels or meet and greets. There were no gear parties. I am at a loss as to what happened between this year and the past years?

Long have I oogled and stared longingly at the other rubber/gear ponies at fur cons when I saw them. I wanted to be among them, but it was my dirty secret. I did not think I would be accepted, nor that I looked good enough to be in, nor could I afford such gear. I finally get over my fears, and self consious come out of the Barn and work really hard to become that which I desired to be like. Only to be ignored, rejected, and left in the cold by my fellow furs.

Never did it cross my mind that as I oogled from the shadows, that the other rubber/gear ponies might not have been well recived either. It never occurred to me that there are Furs (apparently a mjority of them) that think Pony/Pup/Pet play did not belong in furry. It never occurred to me that my fears of rejection and self consiouness over my body image, was nothing more then my own unfounded fears for me to face down and overcome, it never occurred to me that my fears might be real. Fears of being rejected from the community that gave me strength to over come ALL of my anxieties. To become an artist full time. The Strength to make my dreams come true when NO ONE else in my life believed in me.

On the up side of this, I cleared the air with another fur that did not understand what Pony Play was, and thought it was all about bondage, and sex. I got to explain pony head space, and many ponies -like myself- are not in it for the sex. I am in it for the Pony Head Space.

These experiences are not going to make me stop being me, and doing what I set out to do. I wanted to get to a point where I could be an Ambassador for Pony Play. TFF has inspired, not discouraged me to become that Ambassador.

On a Positive Hoof...

I sold 90% of all my merchindise on the first day in the artist alley. I have never had such an over whelming and well received response to my art and my fursuits. It was surreal, not to have been able to get a Dealers Table, and have the fans treat me like I was a GOH. Maybe one day TFF will have me as such. *Wink Wink and Nudge Nudge*

I had lines of people around my table ALL day on Friday, it was overwhelming. The cheetah sold really fast, and I ran out of 4 of my print runs (Say Hello, Together, No More, and Behold all cleared out). I also took 8 commissions there, and 3 painted badges to take home. I sat half a day on Saturday finishing up the at the con commissions. I did not have much left to sale and was bitting at the bit to go enjoy the Con. Sunday I did not even bother with getting a Table.

I now have to fully restock my prints (especially the top sellers), origonal paintings, and make one or more random partials to sale. Not to mention keep wittling down the current commission back log (paintings and fursuits). I can say without a doubt, I am a working artist!

In spite of my one night of poor reception it really is a great con! Maybe next year I will finally get a dealers table. Maybe one year they will make me GOH *Wink*

Brontey Blue

Living the Dream.

So, yesterday I got to spend some time at the Horse Farm/Ranch. It was the first time the weather was good this winter, the farm owner and my schedules aligned, since we met back in November.

It was a little awkward at first, as the farm owner while supportive is not into ponyplay. She had never seen someone gear up to my level in person (or possibly at all), and I was worried she'd get weirded out. It all went well though. She took lot of pics for me (which I will be posting over time). She even gave me an old blue lead rope, because it matched my gear. That made me so happy!

I had a blast! Just hanging out in pony head space in the barns, paddock, and field. I did some trotting thought the fields, and did a little farm work. It was amazing being out in the open air. Horse need their space. I wish I could have gotten to stay longer in that space, but the days are still short, and the winter sun low. There will be more time and opportunities as spring (which I am longing for) approaches.

I have offered to assist with the farm duties, and there is much to be done around the aging infrastructure. So, if anything I will be called back to help, and maybe get some pony time then too.

I am still having a very intense pony high! I was an amazing time... *Whinnies!*

I think this pic sums up "Living the Dream" best: http://www.furaffinity.net/view/26180849/

I had a dream that I was sinking under water, limp (like the opening of the show, "Vikings"). Around me various pieces of pony tack and gear was sinking with me. Several pieces were broken. In the fading light, I panicked and struggled to swim. I felt fatigued, my limbs weak. I grabbed as many pieces as I could before they were lost to the depths, before I ran out of air. As I did, each piece was magically restored, and attached it self to me in a silvery shimmer. Above me, a splash rippled the ceiling of the cold waters. As a blue and silver pony cart swiftly sank past me. I grabbed it...

Like a scene cut, in a movie; As if I were one of Poseidon's Nightmares I rose out of the waters fully geared up in pony gear and tack. Charging from the waves all shiny and black. The golden sun light reflecting off the water falling from me. I galloped, pulling the cart behind me. Not once did the water give, not once did it stop resisting me, applying tremendous drag. Outwardly, I looked strong and proud; yet I still pushed on aching, fatigued, and winded.

Then I woke... It was a beautifully distressing dream.

Body Shaming.

I have always been made to feel ashamed of my body. Fat, Husky, Obese, Average. Words that could be my name, as I been called them all my life. Pony Play has made me feel more confident about my body, about me. It has made me feel good about myself!

Like, I can be loved.

Embrace what you want to do, & do it NOW!.. NOTHING IS going to be here forever... YOU are not going to be here forever!

My Patreon is here: https://www.patreon.com/BronteyBlue

Due to the recent pay structure changes by Patron I have removed the old pay Tiers from public access, and created new tiers. Those that are still paying on the old tiers can keep doing so if you wish.

I have made a Basic ($1.60 = $2), Fan ($4.50 = $5), Collector ($9.35 = $10), and Patron ($23.90 = $25) level tiers for simplicity.

As a result to keep from losing you as my patrons I am setting up a schedule. Every Sunday I will be posting something for ONLY my patrons eyes. It may be a completed piece, it maybe a doodle from sketch book, it maybe a photo of some project I am working on. It will be something.

In spite of these really stupid changes Patron has made, I hope you stick with me, and continue to provide support. Who knows, maybe Patreon will see they made a mistake here, and not change anything, or at least find a better solution for this.

If you are leaving Patreon over these changes, please buy my a Ko-Fi to continue your support of my work. Here: https://ko-fi.com/A1054MR5

Thank you for your support, past or continued.

Brontey

So, I have a friend who likes to tell the world that I am a pony (I mean litterally, will tell strangers in casual conversation that I am pony. Its a bit embarrassing, but I don't really mind), he has a coworker he told about me, and she is cool with pony play. It turns out she has an actual pony farm/ranch. They made arrangements for me to meet her on her farm without telling me to much. I didn't even know her name. I had assumed a lot, like maybe she was a handler. I had no idea what I was walking into.

Turns out she is not actually a handler, but has passing curiosity and a very open mind. She owns an actual bio-pony farm/ranch; 7 ponies, 4 horses, 2 goats, and 1 very spoiled donkey. She also owns a cart I can use if I like. I got to spend the day grazing and socializing with bio-ponies as if I was one of them! They were so affectionate, and accepting. She has offered me a place to gear up in pony, Cart Train, and Pony Play anytime I want. Also, when I get my own cart I can store it there on the farm. I might even get to pony up, and cart supplies to various parts of her 120 acre farm.

I ended the day with Veggie Tacos, chenzy horse items from a local thrift store, and my Pony Pride Flag arrived.

Its has been a good day!

Brontey

I am not sure sure where to start.

So, I am sorry for not posting anything as yet. I will not be transferring over ALL of my old account. Or at least that is not the plan. It would take to long and be a huge pain in my hind quarters. I might slowly start transferring the best picks starting from 2015 on ward, but I have not decided. This part of my profile/phenotype change is the hardest part. FA does not make it easy.

Looking back to 3 years ago when I first thought about my coming out of the barn (I used my Brony OC to test the waters, at that time it was not well received. Possibly because it was an OC, maybe a Unicorn, or maybe a lie everyone saw through) I regret not committing back then. If I had this would not be the 2nd time I would have done this on FA...

This time around however, it seems much more difficult. I have a lot more art, more followers that know me as "Ryngs" (even saying that name now feels awkward), but under now an entirely different name. A handler has ordered me to rip this band aid off and just do it!... I wish it was that easy.

Any ways to the 5 of you who are currently watching me, thank you for your patience. There will be stuff here I promise.

Brontey

The artist formerly known as Ryngs Raccoon.

New account, for new stuff, and a new reinvention of my self.

Stuff will be posted in time.