Forgot to update you all:

I finally got the new pc parts! Unfortunately, I had to sacrifice new storage and case fans because it would go over budget... so this thing is running TOASTY!

I want to thank all those that helped me out on reaching the funds for this. I faced a lot of set backs that stretched the goal for this pc, but I got there in the end thanks to you. I am working on experimenting on some art that I've been wanting to make for a while. It won't be NSFW unfortunately... but it will definitely help me learn more about art techniques and other things.. so stay tuned!

This will take me some time, since I do not have the space to connect any more SATA cables on this motherboard, so my HDD that contains all my art is currently sitting in this pc doing nothing... I will be getting m.2 storage at a local store some other time (and hopefully case fans too) to make space for the hdd. So for the time being, no art.

I've been thinking... I kind of want to get a model made for my robot red panda... It will not be any time soon, I'm still trying to get enough money for a new computer yet. I just want to bring that oc to more media n' stuff.

Anyone know of any modeler that is pretty good at doing robots? I am asking for the sake of asking. I won't be making any moves until I have that new pc and the money after to do any commissions of that magnitude.

Unfortunately, this update is not a happy one for myself.. the universe decided to play a cruel prank on me while I was doodling.

Things got windy and power went out for less than a second, after my pc struggled to boot up, I decided to restart it, since it was stuck on a black screen. Unfortunately for me, it got stuck perpetually installing "updates" at 7%... tried to see if I could do something in safe mode but... no budge, I've lost my pc.

To rub salt in the wound, the wind died down literally shortly after that, and never picked back up again.. I've said it before and I'll say it again: I just can not have nice things..

I've also had to refund $300 from my pool of money that was going to the new pc because these were upfront payments to art... so that dents my progress on getting closer, now I'm farther... again down to $800+. I really just got the short end of the stick

All I can say is, thanks for the help with whatever donation you all could give, but I guess it just wasn't meant to be for me. Don't really expect art for a long time, as I just can't do any now

Gotta say, I thought it was far longer since the last journal, but I guess not. Anyway, progress on the new computer has been awfully slow, speed at which I finish commissions is not enough to get to my goal.. I'm creeping closer, but I'm still about 11 hundred off, though if I want wiggle room so I don't end up broke, I'd need at the very least 15 hundred..

I wish I were making progress on commissions way quicker, but every time I slow down significantly and the time just extends.... I'm hoping these computers I've been eye-ing for a bit don't go off sale any time soon, else I'll have to extend the goal even farther..

I'm genuinely upset whenever I see friends and people post new rigs and pc parts in chats, not at them.. but at the US in general. The great majority don't ship to PR, and the places that do have prices pretty high, and then the shipping costs makes it go even higher.. either way I look at it I can't have nice things.... so much for being a US territory..

I've been attempting to get a job for years, but everywhere I apply I just don't get accepted.. I don't know what it is, but I just cannot get a job no matter how much I look or try.. and the only ones I've managed to land were temporary and didn't last very long in the first place.. I've just about given up looking for a job tbh... but we'll see when I'll be able to afford a computer, I do hope I can get it this year, I'm hoping a lot here..

My pc is still functioning, but I'm still trying to get enough money for a new pc. So far I've not had any luck, and every single option has been reduced greatly. Every pre-built pc I've looked at is over 2k dollars thanks to the scam that is the nvidia 50 series, on top of the very few that do not include the 50 series and are decent enough do not ship to PR.... I hate living here, nothing ever ships to PR, I swear...

I have been trying to go through commissions to get some extra money but it's been incredibly slow..

I decided to build my own pc as a whole, but as it turned out, a lot of the options are either non-existent, or just out of stock, which has been my entire experience while looking for pc parts literally anywhere.. everything is out of stock, and the only available options are insanely overpriced for what they are.

I managed to build a fairly cheap pc, despite some parts being overpriced on top of the shipping ('cause at least they ship to PR), but I was made aware of an issue regarding the gpu I had chosen.. the intel arc b580 doesn't support vr at all, unless I run virtual desktop (according to stuff I've read online). I've seen absolutely nothing about vr and the b580 in the slightest... I have no clue how well it runs or how it performs in general, there is nothing online about it.

I do want to know if ANY of you have the intel arc b580 and do vr, how does it run? Is it worth it? And if you don't have it but KNOW of someone who does own the b580 and does vr, could you let me know if it is worth it?

'Cause I am running out of options here, and I've been left with just two options if the b580 is a no go.. either I spend a stupid amount of money on a pre-built that can be shipped to PR, or I go to stores here and search for something remotely good (which might end up being twice as expensive for some god forsaken reason)

I hate to do this, but I don't have any other choice...

If anyone wants to help me out on reaching my goal to get a new pc, I will appreciate it greatly, even if it's not a whole lot, even if it's just a little, anything helps..

My only income so far has been commissions, and at this moment in time I can't even work on those since my pc could restart at any moment without warning...

Sorry for the rambling, but here is the link to my Ko-fi if you want to help me out: https://ko-fi.com/cyan_s

If possible, also share this around, it would help a ton too! I'll be incredibly grateful..

Man, like two hours later and I have an update on my pc situation.

It's on it's last legs, it has restarted several times without me doing anything, I need a new pc like... pronto... I won't be able to make any art or work on commissions this way.. I can't be sure when's the computer just going to reboot itself at all, and it could cost me hours of work on art because it decides to restart...

I don't know what to do, I may be screwed

Been 4 months since my last journal already??? Jeez time flies... sorry for the lack of art, been on low motivation and have had like... no ideas lately, but hopefully with macro march being here I can come up with something, which I do plan on making art for, so sit tight! I just hope my pc holds on a little longer for all that stuff..

Speaking of, been having more pc issues than I wish to have at the moment.. earlier today this thing decided to restart itself at random.. so uh... that's something.. hoping I can get enough money soon to make the change to a new pc entirely.. before this thing gives up on me and I can no longer do anything else..

I hate to do this, and I really wish I didn't have to... if y'all are willing to help me out, I would appreciate it greatly. I've been trying to take commissions and get them out when I can and get the motivation to work on 'em, but it's been taking too long for me to do them (currently have one to work on and I haven't started.... good thing the person has not paid yet)

Either way, in another small update, I had fractured my fifth metatarsal about.. a month ago now? It's been healing, and it's a lot better now, though not fully healed! So that was fun... also the first time I broke anything... eventful!

Anyway, enough rambling from me, hopefully it doesn't come to me having to get donations from anyone, I don't particularly enjoy getting money out of people for nothing, feels like I owe people things even when I'm told that it's okay and that I don't owe anything back....

I'll hopefully have that macro march pic done sometime soon-ish maybe, stay tuned~!

You can follow me on Bluesky now! Don't think anything will be different between the two, other than more "frequent" updates on whatever's going on in my life or what have you!

https://bsky.app/profile/cyans.bsky.social

But yeah! Hope to see everyone on both places!

The little time I had before to do art has basically been reduced to none for me atm, my privacy has been pretty much reduced by family, no longer can I draw in peace without having someone else around, and I have no options left but to deal with it. It's okay though, doesn't matter much.

In other news, I made myself a Ko-fi! (finally)

So if you'd like to support me, you're welcome to, but no need if you're not interested! Any amount is appreciated with all my heart~! ❤

https://ko-fi.com/cyan_s

I've recently made my way over to Bluesky! If anyone is over there and might wanna also follow me through there, you're welcome to! I'm trying to branch out instead of sticking just to FA for the rest of my life, should do me some good, I think!

For the time being, I'm mostly just going to be reuploading existing art into it, since I haven't been able to draw much lately, but eventually I'll start uploading new things! Here it is!

https://bsky.app/profile/cyans.bsky.social

It's been a whole month and then some already, and I've got.. n o t h i n g to upload here at the very moment, that's a f a t L on my part ngl.... uuuh.. I've been a bit stuck in an artist block.. I have made some sketches, but I don't think they need to be shown, maybe once I get more art going I can show them off as a whole.. hopefully

Anyway, this is mostly just me popping my head in, letting anyone know that I'm still kicking... just not as active as I would want to be... Hopefully I got something going soon! We'll see!

Hey everyone! I'm only here to say I've not fallen ill or have disappeared, I've just grabbed onto a small project as a form of practice, and it has been taking me a hot minute to complete, doesn't help that it is pretty much my first time putting this much effort into it, but it is nearing its completion! So expect the finished image... soon-ish? This week maybe? Not sure, depends on how long I take on this last stretch.

Anyway! See you guys soon with a new pic!

I hope everyone's 2022 was fairly alright! Despite it being a bit of a bumpy ride. I hope everyone had a good christmas and you enjoyed being with families and friends and all that!

I hope everyone had a good new years party too!

Despite not having drawing much this year, I hope I can do more for this new one! I hope everyone has a great evening or rest of the day! Here's to a better year!

P.S. Sorry for the messy wording, I have no real train of thought, I'm writing this as I go and all that!

Sorry for the silence there has been here for the past few weeks, I've had no motivation to do any art for a good bit and it's still going.

I noticed christmas is a week away and I did not notice until today, and I have nothing christmas related for this year. I really do hope I can come up with something before the week is over, I want to get something out before it's late, but if it comes to nothing by then, well, I wish you all a merry christmas and happy holidays, to each and every one of you!

Much love to you all! <3

Some of you might know that I recently got a new tablet after two months, I'll be back to posting more regularly once I'm used to the tablet and I'm back in the swing of it, 2 months was a long time and I feel like all my skills went down the gutter when coming back to this. Just gimmie some time and I'll be posting more big things soon!

Thank you for your time! <3

What an eventful set of months..

Go on a short art break, tablet pen dies when I decide to come back, hurricane strolls through... can't catch a break huh?

Well as you read above, I had a hurricane stroll over on Sunday and knock out all power, signal is all outta wack and I barely have a connection in my house if I don't stay in one spot.

Plans for the new tablet are postponed until things are a bit more relatively normal, and my active times around here are probably gonna be cut down a little due to this bad signal.

Hopefully soon things will return to normal, but until then, stay safe everyone~! ♡

Yet another unexpected turn of events.

I was back into drawing once again, and was planning on uploading this next piece, but my tablet's pen decided it was a great time to call it the end. Pen's battery seems to have died, and I cannot replace it. I am planning on buying a new tablet as a whole... since this one I've been using it pretty scuffed and damaged, but until then it'll be a little longer until I'm back again to working on things.

Sorry for the inconveniences, I wanted to be back and bring something to the table once again, but.. oh well.

We'll see when I can finish this piece and upload it, but until then-

Stay safe, and take of yourselves!

This is nothing serious, it's nothing to do with my health or mental health at all, just unfortunately I am unable to use my computer for the time being for an indefinite amount of time. I'm not gonna go into detail, as it's just boring stuff, but hopefully I will be able to get back to it eventually!

I however, will still be active and around at random! So I'm probably going to be able to reply to messages and notes if those come around!

That's about all I have to say for today.

Be safe friends, and stay big~!

I hope everyone had a great christmas eve and christmas day, I sure didn't but that's due to personal reasons I'm not going to go into.

A lot of things happened this year, lots bad, lots good, but we got through anyway. Here's to hoping for a better one in a couple of hours!

I'd like to apologize for the lack of christmas themed art this month, and the lack of new year art that I should have made months ago or so.. I'm always late to it, and I decided to take a short break on art until things go back to normal and aren't as festive so I can get back to drawing things.

I'm incredibly greatful for all the watches, favorites and comments I have recieved, as much as I'd like to say I'm not worthy of them, you all believe differently.. and I thank you all for it...
It really takes me by surprise how many of you have thought that I'm good enough to be followed by some, even if not actively looking through what I've done or do... starting the year I thought I was going to be the same as I had been the many past years, relatively unknown to many on this site...

I think I've rambled enough, I don't know where I'm taking this as a whole. I just want to thank each and every single one of you for the great times I've had here and I greatly hope every single one of you also have great times here.

Happy New Year guys! Love you boo's~!

My computer gave up on me about a week and a half ago or so, this would mean no art from me for a while. I do have a sketch pad, but it feels alien to me after so many years without touching it... it feels I can't sketch at all. I'm going to have to give it another go until it feels normal again.. anyway. The only reason I haven't posted anything for a bit is just because of this. Sometime soon-ish not so soon I'll have it fixed up... money's always tight, as I have no income and am currently trying to find a job.. here's to hoping I get one.. soon...

On another note, I will be opening commissions for close friends, later on when I feel more comfortable and feel like I can take on the weight of commissions... will I open for the public. I am planning on making a tip only patreon, several amounts of money maybe just one, no prizes... never been fond of patreon or the whole "more money more content to see" kind of thing.

Anyway, this is.. about all I had to say. If I hadn't taken a hiatus long enough last time... this time will take a while for sure, forced hiatus haha. Alrighty, thanks for reading my ramble.

Byebye boos~!

Hello everyone, I'm just here to say I'm going to take an artwork hiatus. I won't be making art, I won't be taking requests, I won't be taking commissions (not that I did in the first place).

I'm just burnt out and don't find it fun at the moment. I'm so tired of searching the internet to find references. I'm tired of having to find poses I like just to do something I want to do. Having no money means I can't commission and I don't see any breaks from art or that change of style I want with my character (the fact that every artist I have searched for is expensive/closed/full/very specific has me incredibly upset too).

I have been at it since I was in 9th grade, nearly 9~10 years of drawing, sketching and doodling. I'm burnt out and find no enjoyment in what I do at this point. If you wanted art from me, well.. all I can say is go look for a different artist and have them do it.

If you still wish to contact me, you can still find me on discord or telegram, mostly discord.

That's about all I had to say. I hope you all stay safe out there, and have a good day.

~Cyan

Hey everyone!

Still kicking over here, even though on edge most of the time... specially this year. Boy oh boy is it a faulty one. Let's all refund this year and get a new one!

It has been awful this past few days, lots and lots of earthquakes have been shaking the area constantly. Strongest one reaching a 6.4 in magnitude (I thought it was a 6.8) a couple of days ago. I'm surprised I haven't actually fallen into a panic attack, the most I have done is break down for a little, but we're still going at least. Hopefully everything calms down very soon and everything goes back to normal... hopefully.

Sorry for the lack of art, haven't been uploading for my own reasons, sometime later when things are back to normal and electricity has returned home, I'll get back to it. All that matters is I'm safe from anything!

I'll be seein' y'all, take care!

Running slow on artwork... no Valentines Day drawing for this year... sadly... I was so eager to draw something but... damn the art blocks... now I just can't draw anything at all... and I still have SO many drawings to make to other people... This is just fan-fucking-tastic. -sigh- I guess I'll just leave this holiday drawing things when they come along...

Anyway, sorry for the delay on the drawings I've been meaning to make! I just need... a while longer for them to be made ye guys. Just hang in there, I'll be making them some time soon!

Happy Christmas, and a happy new year to ye all!



Dang I wish I had something to post fer this... I think I'll have a delayed drawing for Christmas.. no idea when though :D Hoorah for my tardiness!