It's my birthday today, and Today, I don't feel like doin' anything
I just wanna lay in my bed
Don't feel like pickin' up my phone
So leave a message at the tone
'Cause today, I swear, I'm not doin' anything, uh

Well crap I guess I have to do stuff after all lol Am I middle age yet? I'm not sure, 35 as a number does feel kind of old and get an occasional white hair in my beard but I don't feel old, I've actually been dieting and exercising a lot these past two months, lost 15lbs sofar and my fitness has improved and trying to destress with everything going on in the world so I feel pretty alright all things considered.

I do occasionally have moments of "Oh god I'm 35 and still not close to accomplishing my goals! what the hell!" which does suck but I'm less worried/stressed about it in general so maybe that's some of that sweet wisdom or maturity hitting me, who knows lol but surviving has been a good enough accomplishment lately.

One thing that does kinda suck is that before my birthday I learned that someone made a Ai lora model off of one my characters so that sucks. It was probably eventually going to happen but still sucks, I do think its interesting they didn't steal my art style just the character and the funny thing is they didn't even get her proportions right lol

Don't fret there will be dragons! but Smaugust is definitely transforming into Smaugtember lol I have sketches of the pics but they still need to be colored and a lot of junks happened this month so not worried about it, I had a feeling it was gonna have to move into September anyway lol.

I wish I had a big announcement or more news but I'm just trudging along taking one day at a time. I hope your all doing well and staying safe and enjoying Summer,


Sending you all lots of hugs (づ> v <)づ♡

Hey there everyone. Things are going well, and I hope you’re all doing okay too with everything happening in the world.

I was sick recently, but I’m feeling better now. Other than that, not much going on—just staying busy with commissions. I’m making good progress and hoping to have everything wrapped up by the end of 2024 so I can start fresh in the new year. I also have a couple of cool things I think you’ll enjoy that I’ll are in the works but commission sand getting bills paid take a priority.

By the way just a reminder that I’m on BlueSky , in case you want to follow me there (since, let’s be honest, Twitter isn’t what it used to be) https://bsky.app/profile/goblinhord.....s.bsky.social.
I also finally got around to setting up a Linktree! I’m not on a ton of sites, but it’s handy to have all my links in one place: https://linktr.ee/goblinhordestudios.

Hope you’re all doing great and hang in there!

Balloon time! everyone has to be nice too me all weekend (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧ The Birthday Dragon demands the 3 M's Mutton, Maidens and Moolah jk

A few minutes from midnight tonight I'll be 34 years old. I'm not doing anything special for my birthday, just going to make some homemade biscuits and Sausage gravy from scratch and then spend the rest of the day working on more of my dragon drawings in peace and see if I can bust out a few more in time for the last days of Smaugust, but since it's also the year of the Dragon Ill probably draw more during the rest of the year. The weekend will probably be pretty lax and might do something Sunday or Monday.

Hope you all have fun and enjoy your labor day weekend.

Good Evening everyone, I hope spring is treating you right.

I've been feeling pretty good lately, much better then I was for a long while and thought Id give a update.
Life keeps throwing curve balls but I've been doing well in recent weeks and been making good strides in getting the commissions I owe finished which is great, still a ways to go but I'm feeling rather optimistic that summer will be good this year, hopefully no panic attacks like last year YIKES lol, thank you all for being patient with me. People who follow me elsewhere already know I had some bad electrical problems recently, luckily was able to get it temporarily fixed but will need to replace some parts sooner or later so will need to save up some money.

I just finished doing a live stream tonight, been maybe a year since I last streamed any art but it went pretty well, still cant get my mic to sound good but oh well, its not necessary. Id like to stream again sometime this week and Id like to do a Sketch/inked commission stream sometime soon and see how it goes, probably $55 a character if ya'll are interested.

Tho I've mostly been working on commissions and trying to be healthier, I have been creating assets and backgrounds to assemble the first chapter intro for Stay A Spell into a playable demo. backgrounds are still a bit tricky but not to bad. one part that is a big challenge is that where the script for the first chapter ends is where I would like to do an animatic scene with a song, I've been working on writing more lyrics but its pretty hard without a melody to go by. I might need to hire a lyricist and musician.
Basically after Ms. Vixen is introduced I want her to sort of slide into singing "Oh poor little thing, you must be so weary, tired, feelings I know all to well 🎵 , come inside kick up your feet. why don't you Stay A Spell🎶 " as she guides her to the dinning room and begins a Disney like song similar to the likes of Friend like me, Be our guest or Friends on the other side. But I cant plan it out to much without having the song to go off of. even though its going to be an animatic and not a full animation you still need to time the movements to the beat of the song.
Someone suggested using Fiver to hire a song writer and that might be an option, it will probably cost an estimate of around $300-$500 per song which is pricey but understandable but I'm very confused about the licensing and rights to the song, so I haven't gone forward with anything yet.
And when I've tried making wanted posts for musicians in the past for Only In Legend most people do edm and middi stuff, not that those are bad but that wouldn't work to well for a song like this.
Having some sketches/concept art might still be useful and help the song writer even if its not super specific.
And then the first part of the intro requires more assets then expected cause hazels by herself without another character to bounce off of so its relying on a lot of cutscene type image's. plus its set up like the beginning of a film cause that's the whole vibe I'm going for.

I think the smart thing to do will be to spend the rest of April working on my commissions and probably also do some sketch commission live streams and hopefully free up some time and have a little savings to work on Stay a spell in May which would be very nice. but we'll see I don't want to rush or get carried away.

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/53910458/

Been feeling good lately and making good progress. My goal is to hopefully get my commission que all finished by the end of the year for a fresh start which will be nice. Butt I'll have to open maybe 12 more new commissions to make it thru the rest of the year and into the start of January tho so my commission forms are still open if anyone's interested https://forms.gle/18BAWtHRpNm8kWJJ7

This was original for Halloween but forgot to post this here lol

So a little update, It was a lot of hard work and very stressful but I managed to get caught up on all my bills and my property taxes, so for the first time in months I'm actually a little ahead I do still have a decent amount of commissions in my queue that need to be finished but have been making steady progress so that's been going pretty well sofar inspite of some hiccups and people have been pretty understanding and patient. My mental health has also been pretty decent, So Octobers actually been pretty good (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧

I was hoping to have an update for Stay A Spell and Only In Legend this month but haven't been able to work on them much or personnel art or 3D stuff. so that's a negative thing that's been weighing on me & stressing me out a bit but maybe I can get some progress on them soon.

Don't want to jinx it but hope you all have been staying safe and having a good Autumn season sofar.

I wanted to wait till my queue was fully finished, been working my tail off and making good progress too but I really really need to take a few more commissions so I can pay some rent, so opening about 4-5 more slots.

if your interested fill out the form here https://forms.gle/UPNAcY8cFCrGsTj27

Heres the info page https://www.furaffinity.net/view/53910458/

Just wanted to say thank you to each and every one of you who took the time to wish me a happy birthday :) And special thanks to the person who generously gifted me a copy of Sonic Frontiers.

33 has always been a weird scary milestone age I my mind, I guess I always thought I wouldn't live this long or something so hopefully I survive till next year without my heart exploding and don't get nailed to any crosses XD

Summer was way tougher then expected, stressed out, overworked, a month behind on rent, still haven't been able to afford to pay my property taxes and a bit behind on my commissions again but need to open up again with a new info and price page soon. hanging in there tho, hopefully now that the extreme heat has finally ended things will maybe get back to normal for a while. taking a few days off to do nothing and recharge a bit, might actually celebrate my birthday next week wen some family comes to town for a visit.


Oh right! I've written the first chapter of the Ms. Vixen, hansel gretal illustrated story/VN and maybe even a song to go with it lol so that's kind of exciting.
Its a little embarrassing but you can see a little preview of the song here https://www.patreon.com/posts/somet.....silly-88288213

I think I had an Anxiety/Panic attack Thursday.

Id been feeling kinda down and crummy for a couple days and decided to go for a gentle hike at my local nature park but started to feel like I had drank caffeine, heart racing, breathing heavier etc. I was pretty miserable and then at the half way point I had to sit down for a couple minutes cause I had a weird throw upy/crying kind of feel but didn't. As I sat there, even though I had never had one before I thought "What the hell is wrong with me, is this what a panic attack feels like? am I having a panic attack?" Its hard to describe, the only way I can kinda describe it is like Im kind of afraid of heights it kinda felt like that or a drowning feeling even though I was just walking and in no danger. I was trying to act calmly like nothing was wrong but I guess my face looked absolutely miserable cause I overheard some of the other hikers commenting on it. I tried not to worry about it or panic and just kept walking focusing on getting home "I'll deal with it when I get home, I gotta get home, I gotta get home"
Then when I finally got home I was cold, which happens sometimes after exercising especially if you haven't eaten anything yet but this was just a walk, Monday I had sprinted up and around the park and was fine. Then I took a shower to get clean and warm myself up and had that same throw up cry feel but a little more intense and eventually I had to sit down in the shower and then I felt like I had to lay down in the shower on my side which laying down actually made me feel a little better and again I didn't puke or cry. I never sit or lay down in a shower like that unless I'm sick with like a fever or the flue but I didn't feel sick and its been a few days since then and I still don't feel sick.

I felt better after the shower but still felt like I was high on caffeine for a long while after.
I talked to some friends about it and they said that yeah it sounds like a panic attack, I had never had one before so wasn't even sure how to know if I was having one or not. It could have been from any number of things, I havent even been that stressed out latley not like how I was in fall and winter atleast. Luckily I think it was a mild attack but I still don't recommend it, it was awful.

Just a reminder that Commission forms are still open thru April. I might possibly extend the sale into May but not sure. check out the info and price page here https://www.furaffinity.net/view/51371156/

Again thank you for being patient with me it really means a lot, Still struggling a bit but doing better,
Other then mostly working on commissions, not a ton going on lately but might have a nice update on some projects soon.

Check out the price sheet here https://www.furaffinity.net/view/48.....oad-successful

I will have to raise my prices soon but before that I am having a September SALE on simple, single character, Flat color, thigh up commissions.
There are 25 slots available, if interested please fill out the form
https://forms.gle/5ABKafNViCoeM4hQA
and here's a trello for slots https://trello.com/b/M2do0U0P/septe.....22-commissions

I haven't written a journal or posted anything in a while but todays my birthday🎂
Probably not going to do anything for it till the weekend though.
In other news I've been dieting and exercising for 13 weeks and have lost 30 lbs so far (ﾉ◕ヮ◕)ﾉ*:･ﾟ✧
last year I made a goal to lose 30lbs by my birthday, did not succeed last year or the year before that but better late then never XD
https://twitter.com/Goblin0verlord/.....23622207148043

Commission forms for August are open, If your interested in getting a commission please fill out the form here https://forms.gle/DfBHovDCJmqAyhM29 As slots open up I'll pick new ones from the forms filled out. Please don't be upset if yours don't get picked.


Make sure to read the rules and to have atleast one character reference and don't forget to put your contact info down, your DA, FA, Twitter, Discord or Email or else I cant get ahold of you, you'd be surprised how many people leave that blank when filling out the form. https://www.furaffinity.net/view/45981984/


My landlord is raising my rent next month so I might have to adjust my prices for the fall, so if you've been wanting a commission now's a good time so submit a form.

Commission forms for July are open, If your interested in getting a commission please fill out the form here https://forms.gle/DfBHovDCJmqAyhM29 As slots open up I'll pick new ones from the forms filled out. Please don't be upset if yours don't get picked.

Make sure to read the rules and to have atleast one character reference and don't forget to put your contact info down, your DA, FA, Twitter, Discord or Email or else I cant get ahold of you, you'd be surprised how many people leave that blank when filling out the form.

Su'p ya'll, hope everyone had a good 4th of July, I had a pretty decent one this year and had a little bbq.

Just as a heads up, I'll be opening up commissions for July soon, probly post the form link tomorrow so get your ideas ready.

Commissions have been going pretty well overall a little slow this last month partially cause of the heat but still good and I've been doing better in general, still struggling a little bit but seem to be making progress, Haven't been able to work on personnel art very much or Only In Legend but I have had a couple successes and break throughs with 3D stuff and may open commissions for 3D models in the near future.



You can also find me on
Deviantart https://www.deviantart.com/goblinhordestudios
Twitter https://twitter.com/Goblin0verlord
And if you want to support my art maybe join my Patreon https://www.patreon.com/GoblinHordeStudios
You can also support me on Ko-Fi https://ko-fi.com/goblinhordestudios

Some more slots will open up soon, fill out the form if interested. https://forms.gle/siQZVrPN8V4XiDrm9

https://www.furaffinity.net/view/45981984/

Forms for May are open, If your interested in getting a commission please fill out the form here https://forms.gle/nFsptQy65ZN241a69
last time got about 40 forms were submitted which is crazy but remember its not an order form it doesn't guarantee you a commission. The forms are to tell me who wants one and a summary of their idea so please don't be upset if yours didn't get picked.

I forgot that February was such a short month so I' m going to keep the Commission forms open through March.
Commission price sheet https://www.furaffinity.net/view/45981984/
If your interested in getting one please fill out the form here 4uiJvCYq1VS7dA5s7

For people interested in the YCH Booty Bounce Animation commissions their $100 and you can fill out the form here https://forms.gle/gGstG3nkNFqAPG1B8

https://twitter.com/Goblin0verlord/.....77780813172737

I don't normally do this but remember when I said I got slammed with high vet bills and property taxes and might need some help, well I sure forgot lol and this is that moment so if youd like to donate a little bit to my Ko-fi! that would be swell https://ko-fi.com/goblinhordestudios

Its totally stupid, I paid the vet bills just fine, but Kaiya died on the due date for the taxes and I was 2 days late but I paid a third and set up a payment plan, which is normally fine but cause it was 2 days late I have to pay it all in full or according to the person I talked to on the phone "you have 30 days to pay it in full or a warrant will be issued for your arrest and your property will be seized by the county" I wish I got their name to report them cause that's not true. They were being very threatening over just $500, I've always paid my property taxes and have never been late before so it's very uncalled for. I'm not worried about it but I'm also not in the mood to fight it.


I think what's happening is their confusing my house number with my neighbors house cause the people who used to live there got evicted by the state and the new people who bought it might not have paid it all off yet.
But I don't want to get mixed up in that.

My commission que is close to being finished and was going to do a journal abut that but I'm not there yet to open commission's again yet so if you'd like to donate a little to my Ko-fi to help with this that would be great but don't worry if you cant.

Hopefully my next journal will be more positive.

Rest in peace my Kaiya bear, thank you for being in my life and being my best friend. You were the best thing in my life and I don't know how I'll go on without you. I love you more then anything in the world, I'll always love you forever. May we be reunited someday.

Its been a few days since its happened, I talked about it on twitter but didn't think to anywhere else https://twitter.com/Goblin0verlord/.....64206676529152 Kaiya's had hip problems most here life and at 15 years old they were taking their toll on her pretty bad. 90% of the time she couldn't stand or go to the bathroom by herself, she had good and bad days but the bad days were becoming more frequent. I tried to prepare for the inevitable and got my learners permit so we could go to parks and the beach before it was to late, I thought we would have maximum a year left together or at least a few months but her health and quality of life started to decline and was in pain. All through the pandemic its been impossible to get an appointment with a vet and they wont prescribe medicine on video calls without physically examining her in person so all I was able to give her was doggie aspirin and a slew of hip and joint supplements which hardly helped if at all. After a very bad week I was afraid Id have to take her in to the emergency room, I called and made the appointment with the mobile vet "Wish I knew they existed sooner" he would do an exam but unless he had some magical solution no one else has thought of it would be time to put her to sleep and say goodbye.

I hated myself and was absolutely terrified. She had good days during her last week which I should be an am very grateful for but the good days made it so much harder cause they gave me hope she could get better and if it was just her hips I would have canceled the appointment, I'm lucky enough to work from home and can be by her side and take care of her but there were other problems and complications, it seemed she couldn't digest her food anymore and could only handle broth, pureed pumpkin and a little bit of meat to take her pills, she refused to drink water and barely had any for days. Kaiya had one of her good days and was able to take her to the dog park. She had a good day tho she mostly laid down, their were some friendly huskies who weren't afraid of her and very patient with her bitchiness cause of course she has to be the dominate one even when she cant stand. the day before, my mom helped me taker her to our hiking place at Powell butte to walk around a little, she hadn't been able to go in several years because it was to difficult for her and I pushed her more then I should have since this would be our final walk together. Mostly during her final weeks we laid together on my bed just watching movies and shows together. I should have done it months ago but I moved my bed to the floor so she could get on easier.

Kaiya and I spent her last morning Monday just laying together and watching movies. We watched Wolf Walker's, The Lion King and Princess Mononoke. Kaiya had a steak, baked potato, vanilla ice cream and just a little bit of chocolate ice cream. The vet arrived to put her to sleep, she went really peacefully, I tried not to but I cried thru the whole thing, really I had been crying every day for several weeks but this was worse. the vet said that it was the right thing but that doesn't make it better, It just feels like I killed my best friend who I love more then anything. When she was gone, I held her in my arms hugged her and cried harder then I ever had in my life for I'm not sure how long, but long enough I lost the feeling in my legs. My mom come to help me take her to the cremation place which I didn't want to cremate her, I had wanted to bury her naturally and plant a tree over her but that wasn't possible anymore. Returned home, changed the blankets and sheets cried and passed out. The next day I just laid in bed and cried all day, my head hurt and felt like I had a fever, only having a brief reprieve where I felt ok for about an hour enough to eat and drink something and go to sleep.

I've had a hard life, some days its to much to get out of bed. I've been homeless in some form or another atleast 4 times, earliest at the age of 4, neglected, abandoned, used and betrayed by people i thought cared about me more times then I'd like to admit. I might have been molested when I was 14 but I don't know if it was a nightmare or a memory I've repressed. I feel like the world hates me, like I'm cursed and being punished for something that I don't even know what I did wrong. Just an unlovable broken trash person fated to forever try to crawl out of the garbage heap and never succeed. I don't think I've ever been ok or ever truly felt safe. Having Kaiya in my life and loving her made it better, their are no words to describe how much she meant to me, she was my baby, my big floofy fussy stubborn lazy wolf princess and now I have to learn to live in a world without her. I don't want people to worry, I know it's dark but it's not that kind of post. I'm trying to take someone's advice and trying not to bottle it up. I felt I had to get it out or I never would. I appreciate my friends who have checked in on me but it's hard to reply back. It's so painful, I'm sorry for anyone whose ever had to go thru this.

---

Its been a few days since all this has happened, I'm doing a little better since the time I wrote all this on twitter. Better is not really the right word for it, its more that the dread, terror and pain of waiting for the vet to arrive and the event itself is no longer looming over the horizon any more, its not in the future or present but as Rafiki says "It's in the past" and while that doesn't make it ok it is sort of a weight that's lifted that makes it a little easier to breath. I don't know if that makes sense, I've never grieved before. Something that made me feel a little bit better was, I really wanted to keep Kaiya's canine teeth so I could make them into a necklace as a keepsake and always have a piece of her with me and could take to my own grave someday. But nobody would do it, none of the vets or morticians not even the taxidermist would do it. So I don't even have that and it made me very upset that I couldn't even have that small wish. I remembered that some people carry the ashes of their loved ones in an urn necklace and I discovered they have some in the shape of a wolf's tooth. It's not the same at all and the reviews for them aren't very good cause they only hold a few flakes but at least it's something, and maybe its the artist in me but I though maybe I could make my own and that made me feel a little better, as stupid as it sounds.

My birthdays tomorrow I'm going to be 31 which is going to be weird, 30 didn't bother me to much but 31 feels like its gonna take some getting used to.

Anyway I haven't been active so I thought Id give a lil update. I have been active behind the scenes and got a lot of stuff done last month, was super excited about august but I've been having some health issues lately, nothing serious! don't want y'all to worry its very minor but I did have quite the hassle with dealing with my doctors and insurance, sort of got it figured out but this month just flew by much faster then expected.

I have been feeling pretty lousy but since it turned out to be not very serious and I have to wait till November to take care of it completely hopefully I'll have more art to post in September and October. Also here's my twitter if you want to fallow me on there https://twitter.com/Goblin0verlord

Everyone who has a current commission with me that hasn't been finished yet and would like or need to request a refund please fill out this form https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1q_.....tIXRp2x6s/edit
Please fill it out even if you don't want a refund at this time and art just wanting an update.
You don't need to get a refund, I haven't stopped working on the commissions I still owe but if you want or need one then don't hesitate to ask, there will be no hard feelings.

---

Hey everyone been a while, Hope you all have been keeping safe and are doing well.
I've been really swamped and still trying to catch up with the aftermath of 2020, taking a lot longer then I thought and not gonna lie its been pretty overwhelming at times, but I'm doin much better and in a pretty good place at the moment so hope I didn't scare anybody and sorry for the lack of communication, I should be getting back to posting art here again soon ;)

Also please don't send notes unless you absolutely have to, thx

https://picarto.tv/GoblinhHordeStudios
I'm going to be streaming a couple more characters tonight over on Picarto this time. Come hang out for a while if you'd like ^^

Again this is not a commission stream, I'm not accepting any commissions ATM

Ill be streaming some more doodles a little later on Piczel.tv if you want to come hang out for a little while. I'll post a link when ready.

And again this isn't a commission stream, I'm not accepting any commissions.

Just wanted to give y'all a quick update.
It took a while longer then I thought it would to sort it out but I managed to avoid eviction and catch up on all my bills which as long as my landlord doesn't do anything else stupid everything should be fine.

IM NOT CURRENTLY OPEN FOR COMMISSIONS OR ART TRADES ATM
I've got a bit of a backlog I've been working though best I can but I'm still trying to sort through stuff and get in contact with people to get them their com or trade or refund as soon as possible. Try to avoid sending me any new NOTES or DM'S for a bit, I cant respond to all of them at once but I see you I'm not trying to avoid anyone its just going to take a little time and I hope your all doing ok.

Sometime soon as soon as I can get it set up I'll be posting another journal for people who have a commission with me that would want/need a refund. To be clear I'm not canceling the commissions but times are tough and it could take me a while yet to get through em and I'm sure some of you could really use a refund/ want one cause its taking so long and that's ok.

OTHER NEWS
I'm working with my team on creating a demo for Only In Legends kickstarter page and I might be starting a small youtube channel sometime in the coming year, if I can work up the courage that is lol

Love you all and keep staying safe everyone.