So afraid of being completely forgotten and replaced. Every time I check my phone hoping that at least one person wants to talk to me, there's nothing but a clock ticking away every minute of my lonely existence.

Minutes have started to pass like seconds. Hours like minutes, weeks like days. Months like weeks.

I don't think anyone appreciates the amount of things I've done for them.
I try to talk to the people closest to me about my horrible day; and they refocus it on themselves. I end up listening the same thought going through my head. My words don't matter. My thoughts my feelings don't matter.

That is how I am treated by everyone I know.
So why do I keep thinking that someone will see the pain I've hidden so well?
Or the words I keep locked inside myself because the world refuses to hear them. The secrets I hide, the broken pieces of myself as they shred my soul.

What have I ever done to deserve this... Why is that when I try to help anyone I am ignored, blown off, or yelled at?

I'm watching as I'm betrayed blatantly. Right in front of my eyes.
The lies I'm fed. The knives that are thrust into my back.

What did I do?
Why am I so undeserving of loyalty?

Why is that as I look back at everyone else they are the distant light that I wish I could partake in? Why am I forced to walk a path into my own insanity by myself? Why won't one single person have the heart enough to find me. Save me from this painful pit of darkness.

Why is it that the only soul who can truly see me has no ability to speak to me? To comfort me from the demons that torture me..


When everyone has left me I suppose this won't matter much anyway...