Nope that drawing above is not clickbait this game is called The Campaign for North Africa The Desert War 1940-43 and that is the estimated playtime of the game of 1,200 hours with it claiming it can take up 1,500 hours. Originally relased in 1978 this game is simply unweildy and while cam be played with only two players it is strongly recommended to play with two teams of five, each team consisting of a Commander-In-Chief, Logistics Commander, Rear Area Commander, Air Commander, and Front-line Commander.

Sound crazy yet? Get ready because we are just getting started. The rule books in their entirety is 322 pages and the game board is just under three feet wide and at 9 1/2 feet long, 12 logistical sheets, the three storage trays you'll be using for the 1,800 counters the game has, plus one six-sided die for reasons.

Now here is what you have to do to move one divison unit one time... *takes a deep breath*....

Locate the org chart for that division, ensure that there is enough fuel and water to allow movement, move the unit, counting Capability Points (a measure of what the unit can do in a turn) and Breakdown Points (the two are different) as you go, calculate fuel usage (different vehicles have different fuel usage rates), calculate water usage, subtract fuel and water used from the total available for the division, tally total Breakdown Points, roll against the Breakdown Chart for each type of vehicle in the division, remove any broken vehicles from the Org chart for the division and place a counter on the map representing them, note these broken vehicles on the broken down vehicle sheet, then take a deep breath. You are ready to move another division. But wait, this division may be able to move again after the round of combat, and you get to do it all over again.

Stuff like tanks have their own rules and aircraft to be blunt in all practicality is impossible if not ridiculously improbable.

Here is the full list of what you do in a turn... please bare with me....

1. Plan strategic air missions
2. Raid malta
3. Plan Axis Convoys
4. Raid Convoys
5. Distribute stores and consume stores
6. Calculate spillage/evaporation of water and adjust all supply dumps
7. Determine initiative
8. Determine weather(Hotter weather results in more evaporation of water)
9. Distribute water
10. Reorginize units
11. Calculate attrition of units short of water and stores
12. Begin building construction
13. Begin training
14. Rearrange supplies
15. Transport cargo between Africa ports
16. Bring convoys ashore
17. Deploy Commonwealth fleet
18. Ship repair
19. Plan tactical air mission if airplanes are fuelled
20. Begin air mission which includes fight air-to-air combat, fire flak, carry out mission, return to base, airplane maintenance
21. Place land units on reserve
22. Movement which is where you do the procedure above plus enemy reactions and repeat
23. Combat. Here you dignate each tank and gun as forward or back, plot and fre barrages, retreat before assaulr, secretely assign units to anti-armor or close combat, fire anti-armor, adjust ammunition, deploy destroyed tank markers and update records to reflect loses, carry out probes and close assaults
24. Release reserves
25. Move rear trucks
26. Begin repair of breakdowns
27. Make patrols
28. Repeat all movement and combat steps a second time
29. Do all movement and combat steps a third time

This is all then done by the other team which comepletes one game turn... it is estimated that one turn takes 10 hours... and it is estimated that this game takes 100 turns... I need a drink!

On a side note, as of the posting of this there is no known instance of anyone doing a full game, not even the playtesters of the game finished it once. Now if you really want a full deep dive I recommend the video KamSandwich did on the game, the video is called The World's Longest Board Games(The 100 Club) and he starts talking about it around the 11 minute mark. From here on out I am just going to give my own opinion and insight... I just wanted to do this so that you can enjoy watching me lose my mind.

Now I don't mind complexity in a game, but... this is nothing short of impossible to play... this game has long been out of print and when a copy of this game goes on Ebay it's price is usually $1,000 overall. As a collectors item I can see the appeal but as a game I don't really see anyone getting much out of it.

I think what they were going for was they wanted to go all in with the numbers and logistics and these were issues that plagued both sides of the war and in any war you do need logistics and proper planning right down tothe smallest detail and working out how resources are gathered and used. In that way they did succeed, but does this translate into a game you can realisticly play? No just becuse of how unweildy it is and you are asking a ton for retention time. The closest video game equivilent would be Hearts of Iron IV, now there is a bit of a learning curb but with HoI4 it is way better in the sense that you aren't really dealing with much busy work, heck I am still learning how the navy and air force works but overall it is a fun expirence. And by they I mean overall one guy ended up making this game after the rest of the team quit or were reassigned to other projects.

To tell everyone the absolute truth I am amazed that this thing even exist and in the credits this one guys reserched as best he could for an extended length of time and wanted to go even deeper to include systems with the homefronts of both sides right down to candy manufacturing. I don't even think the word ambitious fits this, you can tell this was a massive passion project and a lot went into it, I will not doubt that for a second. However the real question is, since this is a board game... the real question is, is this playable to where you can play this game fully? My answer is obviously no, you are asking a lot given one turn is estimated to take 10 hours and a full game estimated to take 1,200 to 1,500 hours... or 50 to 62.5 days worth of time. Is playing through a game like this at all possible? The main problem is just how bloated it is and just the sheer number of systems this thing has, it is a very realistic approach but your average person is not going to even make it through one turn, much less a full game given there is no way their attention is going to be retained just due to you will be doing paper work far more than actually playing.

As much as I like games and content that takes place during World War 2 this is a game I would never play because I have seen some footage of this monster on Youtube and just the set up alone takes an insane amount of time, this thing literally needs it's own game room just due to how much there is to it. Now to compare this to a few games I have played, after I got the Battletech starter box and played a game with the eight mechs because I am not use to it a full game took a good chunk of time, I don't rememeber exactly I think maybe five or six hours because I was constantly checking the charts to make sure I was getting everything right and it was fun turn out because of the damage system and how interactive it is overall. If I were to get use to it I can see a full game taking maybe an hour or two with the same set up.

To keep it in the real of World War 2 however, let's compare this to a game of Bolt Action, I know that is a wargame but given the sheer insanity of Desert War I think it works perfectly fine. Now the core 2nd edition rulebook is just under 230 pages long and also comes with a few unit entries for a few armies so if you wanted to play straight away from just the rulebook it is possible with each army book roughly at 100 pages. Now while the number of pages are the same bwteen both, the rules for Bolt Action flow pretty quickly and is easy to understand which I did my best to show in my Intro to Wargaming submission(Which I will link below to where it is on my FA) and when I did a full game it was 2500 points if I remember correctly and it took about two in a half hours give or take, so let's just say three hours which means for one turn of the Desert War you can play three massive games of Bolt Action 2nd edition with time to spare, so much you can just do a small skirmish game to fill in that last hour.

That game by way was epic in that my Tiger 1 got taken out turn one by a T-34/85... after my Tiger missed the T-34/85 and it was victory for my germans in the end largely thanks to my Stuh-42 and my medium mortar team where I was constantly getting 6's for the latter especially and both sides basically had everything at veteren rating outside of a unit or two.

That's another thing too, with the Desert War your mind does not have the chance to interact with the game in a cinematic way to help keep you engauged which is a huge problem just due to information overload. This does help, letting your imagination fill in the gaps when a game plays out is one of the best parts when it comes to both baord games and war games, heck even Chess has that.

All in all, Desert War is a very interesting conundrum and the only times people have won is when the other players have either quit or even passed away. And I am amazed it even got passed testing without someone saying "Yeah maybe this should be toned down, there is just too many systems" espcially given as I said before not even the playtesters got through one game and there is no known instance where a legitiment full game has been done, the rulebook even says that if there is a tie it calls it a waste of time. Plus when you look up reviews for it there is no middle ground it is either people praising it and saying it is immersive or those that say this is a waste of time and unplayable.

To be honest I do have to agree with the latter, there is just way too much to keep track of and there is way too much busy work to make even one hour of playing feasible, heck even the designer himself stated he hates the systems relating to aircraft... I am willing to bet that can be said for pretty much all the other systems. I get it, it's a game that tries to emulate not just the combat but right down to the boring yet very critical logistics, something that rarely if ever gets touched on, it wouldn't surprise me if at one point there was consideration to extract ore and other materials so that ammunition and fuel could be made to componants that make up vehicles and so on... probably would inflate the rules to over 1,000 pages if that was done. Heck no matter how many times I have this game explained to me I still have no idea how this game is suppose to really work... and even just trying to read the rules of this thing will drive you insane faster than Tzeentch's Impossible Fortress, yes even the Great Conspirtor would look at this and probably scream from how crazy this is.

*Sighs and takes a deep breath* Geez, I am gonna leave it here... I hope everyone enjoyed me losing my mind and enjoyed hearing about... probably the most insane game ever in terms of game time and unplayable complexity.

Now to go find what I want most right now... that freaking drink!

Intro to Wargaming: https://www.furaffinity.net/view/59007493/

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