Memo to self: Do not go back to dating apps after accidentally linking my resume. I did get a lot of job offers for secretary positions though. How odd...
Me: "I love the way you stare so intensely at me during the sunset. It gives me a sense of..."
Him: "THE SUN IS LITERALLY BURNING MY RETINAS!!! CAN WE FUCKING LEAVE!?"
-Failed Attempted Murder 001-
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