my dad (Maori) works on a ship with all Maori/Tongan/Samoan fisherman- and one Aussie guy called Jake.

And that wasn't done on purpose just sort of how it ended up, but Jake recently got an injury so they put him on a Different boat just for a little bit (a sit in the wheelhouse and scout type of boat, instead of the main fishing one) and he only got back to my dad's ship today and he was apparently like Shaking. He was Traumatised.

Dad said Jake kept pulling him aside and going "They were all yelling on there, but in a MEAN way" "They didn't clean... Like at ALL"

Jake experienced what a boat full of old school Aussie fisherman is like. That is the norm Jake. You just happened to be on the all Island boy boat on your first go out. "It was time for dinner and they had FROZEN nuggets" Jake that's what they have on ships that are out at sea for months at a time.

On my dad's boat they are eating fresh fish and coconut milk Ceviche. They're grilling steaks on an open bbq on the deck that probably is not regulation. All the guys have their own special knives to prepare sashimi every couple days. Everyone is happily doing their own work so they can clock out early and set up a movie on the deck. Jake did you genuinely believe that's what every boat was doing.

Local Australian man is fed fresh juices and smoked fish for first time- refuses to go back to beef jerky boat life

Have you guys noticed how much the internet/technology just does not listen to you anymore? I click “don’t show this artist” on Spotify and I get recommended a music video by them on the front page. I click “skip this update” on a pop up every time I open a file organization app and it’s right back there every time. O click unsubscribe on a newsletter and it keeps showing up in my inbox!! I click “delete my account” and the next time I open the website they suggest I “reactivate”.

Power is a funny thing.

PUNIC WARS THREE

PUNIC WARS FOUR

awesome news, everyone!!

sorry for [remembering a tumblr post about expressing gratitude instead of apologising to make the interaction more positive for the other person] i mean thank you for having a boyfriend who was so easy to run over withmy car and reverse over three times maybe four

Sometimes reading Arthuriana feels like reading Alice in Wonderland.

“Well,” said Alice, “these are a dreadfully strange assortment of objects!”

“They all symbolize different aspects of Our Lord’s martyrdom,” said the Fisher King, casting a line into his teacup.

“Indeed. I am sure everything symbolizes something else, for if everything was only itself I should be very confused. Might I ask what the point of the bleeding lance is?”

Alice regretted asking the question as soon as she had done so, for she saw the pun that would likely be made about the word point. Instead, however, the room erupted in applause and shouts of “The Grail! She has achieved the Grail!”

The next castle she visited, Alice resolved to herself as the inhabitants of this one danced for joy, would be more sensible.

Or I could do this with The Knight of the Cart.

“Which shall you choose?” asked the guardian. “The underwater bridge or the sword bridge?”

“Both sound dreadful,” said Alice. “I think I’ll just float the cart across.”

The guardian sputtered so hard his helmet broke.

“You cannot ride in a cart to rescue a queen!”

“I don’t see why not,” said Alice, growing cross. “It can’t be worse than abducting a queen.”

“Oh, much worse! For to abduct a Queen is wicked but heard of, while to save he on a cart is virtuous and unheard of.”

“Oh, tosh!” said Alice, floating the cart.

“If you cut my head off,” said the Green Knight, “then in a year and a day, I shall cut off yours.”

“Certainly not!” said Alice.  “For if you can survive such a blow, it would be quite unfair to me, and if you cannot, then I will have killed a man over a silly game!”

“Silly games are the most important thing in the world,” said the Green Knight, “for it is after them that we judge honor.”

Alice thought to herself that if this was honor, adults could keep it.

In honor of a thing that keeps popping up in Arthurian novels I read…

“You have nothing to fear,” said the robber knight, “for you are traveling alone. Everyone knows a knight may not attack a maiden alone, but only a maiden traveling with a knightly protector!”

“That can’t possibly be a law,” said Alice. “Camelot is absurd, but not that absurd.”

“It is not a law, but a custom.” The robber knight sounded as if he were lecturing a fool, which Alice felt was very unfair of him. “Customs are far more important than laws, for laws may change, but customs never do.”

Alice didn’t think that was true, but she would not argue the point.

“What about attacking a knight?” she asked. “Can someone attack a lone knight, or only a knight traveling with a maiden?”

“One may attack a knight any time and under any circumstance. That is the meaning of the word ‘knight’- he can be attacked by day or by knight!”

With the understanding that, as a maiden traveling alone, she might attack the knight and he could not return the attack, Alice picked up a handful of rocks from the ground and began to throw them at him. She was not generally an unruly child, but everyone has their limits.

“And this,” said Morgan le Fay, witch queen of the isles, “is my healing potion.” She gestured to a luminous, bubbling concoction in a pewter cauldron, which issued a smell that was a bit like lavender and a bit like castor oil. “I keep an endless supply of it, should my brother King Arthur ever fall to a mortal blow with none else who could heal him.”

Alice thought this sounded reasonable enough, until a thought occurred to her. (That was the trouble with thoughts- they upset otherwise reasonable conversation.)

“Didn’t you try to kill your brother?” she asked. “With a cloak that turned into fire?”

“Yes,” said Morgan. “What of it?”

“It seems,” said Alice as politely as possible (for she did not wish to anger a woman who could turn clothes into fire) “that nearly killing your brother and then saving him is going to a great deal of trouble, which could be avoided by simply not killing him at all.”

“Ah,” said Morgan chidingly, “foolish child! If I did not strike the mortal blow against Arthur, then how would he know to be grateful to me when I saved him?”

Alice considered quarrels she’d had with her sister, and was thankful that neither of them were witches.

“A curse upon me,” Mordred cried, “a curse that ever I was born! I have brought ruin upon Camelot, and an end to the days of noble knights, all by my destiny to slay my father!”

Alice looked about, just in case the city of Camelot had fallen while she wasn’t looking. It hadn’t. She felt very sorry to see Mordred weep, and when he ignored her offer of a handkerchief, she thought she might be able to settle things simply by making an observation.

“You haven’t destroyed Camelot!” she noted with a bright tone. “Look, it’s still here!”

“What does that matter?” Mordred snapped. “I must mourn now for the dead I will cause, for I will not have time after I have killed them! Just as my father should have repented for all the infants he could have drowned alongside me on May Day, as he would not had time afterwards!”

“But he didn’t,” Alice pointed out. “You’re not drowned.” She hadn’t personally thought King Arthur the infant-drowning sort, but if he was, he had clearly missed at least one. “And you haven’t killed him, either!”

“And thus, because he did not repent and then proceed to drown me and all the other boys, I must mourn and then proceed to kill him and everyone else! One of us has to get destiny going around here, even if he’s slacking!”

Alice put a head to her forehead, which was beginning to hurt. Perhaps she was the one who had sustained a blow to the skull in the tournament rather than Mordred.

Alice had once seen a giraffe in a zoo, and was rather excited to see one in the wild. When she finally encountered the Questing Beast, however, it turned out it really was a strange creature with the neck of a snake, the body of a leopard, the haunches of a lion and the feet of a deer. In retrospect, she really should have anticipated that.

“Beware, human child,” said the Beast over the sound of hurgling and gurgling in its belly, “for I am an ill omen!”

“I am very sorry to hear it,” said Alice. “Can you go to a doctor for that?”

“My birth was a very unpleasant story,” it said as if it had not heard her.

“In that case,” Alice said quickly, “you needn’t-”

“It began with a pair of royal siblings and an incubus…”

Alice sighed and slumped down on the ground, knowing this to be the start of a story she wasn’t going to easily escape from.

“This sword,” said the Lady of the Lake, “proclaims its bearer the True King of the Britons!”

“Oh,” said Alice. “Pardon me for asking, but I thought King Arthur already had a sword proclaiming him the True King of the Britons. I think he got it from a stone?”

“Ah,” said the Lady, “but this is Excalibur, the better sword!”

“I thought the other sword was Excalibur?” Alice should have probably let the subject drop, but she was going to have trouble talking about any of this if she couldn’t get it straight.

“No,” said the Lady, “that was Caliburn! Sometimes called Excalibur! This is also Excalibur!”

“But King Arthur already has-”

The Lady thrust the sword towards her, and although it was larger than she was tall, Alice took it, if only to get out of the conversation as soon as possible.

“Which do you prefer,” asked the Lady, “the sword or its sheath?”

“I didn’t really want either of them,” said Alice. “But I suppose the sword, since that’s what you’ve been making such a fuss over.”

“Then you are a fool!” proclaimed the Lady, “for the sheath is far more valuable!”

Alice, who had had quite enough of this by now, stomped off with the sword and sheath through the water.

These are the three great blows that changed the fate of Camelot

The first was when Mordred struck Queen Guinevere, and Merlin proclaimed the prophecy of three great blows

The second was when Alice entreated Gawain to pull his brother off of the queen

The third was when Alice suggested that, in order to finish off the prophecy before it got out of hand, Gawain ought to smack his brother once more for good measure

one of the primary issues in the Beauty Privilege discourse is that every word for beauty/attractiveness that we now use as synonyms used to, as recently as a half century ago, be very strongly-defined semantic sisters meaning different things. you find this out quickly when reading victorian novels. "attractive" for instance didn't refer to physical appearance, but "beauty" and "prettiness" did, but weren't synonyms of each other, either. "handsome" was distinct from "beauty" and both were used to refer to men and women but meaning different things. "charming" was something else. etc. this created a healthy semantic ecology where people had stronger self-identification with various categories. maybe you weren't beautiful but you were absolutely charming. maybe you were a handsome woman (these still exist thank GOD). in modernity it's all been flattened into "hot or not" which is a category error because it's far more subjective than more granular and numerous definitions

Video caption: Good guy who talks like a bad guy 

“Perhaps you’d like to see my pets. They were ALL … rescues.” 

“And as always, gentlemen, our profits will be … donated.” 

“Oh, I wish I could stay and chat, but I’m afraid I have to take my friend to the airport.” 

Redeemed villain who can’t let the speech pattern go

You know, one of the most shameful consequences of scifi/game authors not knowing shit is cyberpsychosis, or Essence, or whatever in-universe asspull for a mechanical limiter on how much cyberware you can cram into a character sheet.

There is an easy excuse in real life! You may not be able to get both a pacemaker and a DBS device because they're both pieces of sensitive equipment that could theoretically interfere with each other, and nobody engineered them not to. Trivially you can extrapolate this to all cybernetics. If your various augs weren't Specifically designed not to mess with each other (and of course the various megacorps might take things a step further, making their shit actively hostile to mix-and-matching), you might have problems; and obviously, the more pieces of hardware you've patchworked yourself with, the worse things get. You'd have to be one real crazy motherfucker to tell a back-alley doctor to load you up with whatever they've got.

It's more grounded and more realistic and less shitty and it actively enhances the atmosphere of cyberpunk in a way that "losing your humanity" does not. we are missing out on much because none of these writers know anything about how medtech works

Wasilla, Alaska

patrickthunalaskaphotos

can’t stop thinking about them

CC:

Two tiktok clips posted together by tiktok account shooshimango

clip 1 of a tiktok: food is dipped into a white sauce, with a brief view of a man eating it. "delicious with tee-zay-tee-zai-kai" is narrated by a masculine narrator. onscreen, a caption of "delicious with taztziki" is shown.

clip 2: three men in wigs (toupés?) look disgusted at the camera. one of them is wearing a cross; they are dressed as stereotypes of their own greek culture. after a pause, the one in the center repeats "tee-zay-tee-zai-kai, eh?". A second later, all three begin manically screaming over each other in greek: "There*! Wanker! what are you saying, my babe**? it's dza-dzee-kee! dza-dzee-kee you*** idiot! what are you saying?". two of the men walk off screen in contempt at the end.

*you can say "there" in Greek in a way that is a deep insult. it requires a hand gesture.

**μωρέ μου can only really be used at a peer/older person, is masculine, and is derogatory, but does technically derive from my baby. generally used to imply you've had enough of someone's bullshit.

*** ρε and βρε kind of mean "you" and are disrespectful. you might use them with your mate in a friendly way but here it's an insult.

My child, who spends their entire life being transfered from home to car to school and back, and is not allowed to leave the house or talk to anyone and can only in their wildest dreams imagine a life free from constant surveillance, is very sad. Obviously they're dumb and lazy, like all kids these days.

kind of a tangent but i recently went to a bowling alley with my friend i'm 19 he's 18 and the woman at the door didn't want to let us in because there was a sign saying under-18s needed adult supervision. everything got cleared up and we were able to go bowl, but i'm still so mad about the fact that kids need adult supervision to go to a bowling alley and arcade. like okay maybe young kids should have supervision but what do you mean middle and high schoolers need to hold mommy's hand while they play video games. kids aren't just addicted to their phones because phones are addicting, we're addicted to our phones because there's nothing else to fucking do

I'm sure banning kids from online spaces while simultaneously not ensuring that they have access to offline spaces to socialize in (without having to rely on their parents who already don't have time for them) will help them feel better & less alienated from society.

I’ve been laughing at “fuck this lemon you take it” for several minutes

take this papaya from my cold dead hands is sending me again oh my god

badminton is dont hit the fucking ground you stupid disgusting baby bird

every day this post has more responses that make me lunge back in my chair with the most unnecessarily loud cackle

Hockey is I’m gonna launch this peppermint patty at you and the only way to stop me is violence

curling is my two friends and i really want to put a watermelon in that exact spot, but the floor disagrees

relay racing is "here, you take this leek"

does anyone have that 4chan post about the guy who got like. deradicalised from being an incel because he started taking care of shrimp?

i can't post pictures in replies so here u go

thats the one! thank you!

I think of shrimp guy often and I hope he and his shrimp are doing great and if I ever meet him I would love to ask about them

i’m very self aware. which unfortunately hasn’t solved anything

hate when mummy movies use Imhotep as the big bad. He was an architect. Imagine a mummy movie but the mummy is Frank Llyod Wright. And he was buried at the House On The Rock. Ok nevermind that would be a sick ass movie.