my 'I ❤️ TIME PARADOXES' t-shirt has a lot of people asking questions that are about to have always been answered by the shirt
Seasonal Affective Disorder is just emotional scurvy, all my core wounds are reopening and they won't be fixed until the big lemon in the sky comes back
some of you need to put down chat gpt and pick the magic 8ball back up
The person most responsible for a safe flight
The pilot: ❌️
Air traffic control: ❌️
The insanely anxious passenger seated perfectly still with her eyes closed who believes she has a horse girl-like spiritual connection to the plane and is whispering soothing things to it in her mind during turbulence: ✅️
i'm on the porch of your grandma's grandma's blown-down farmhouse sniffing on prairie smelling salts. smoking the judy garland pack with the bright red trichromes. i start rolling another joint and your girl goes down right away like the shelter's in the cellar. twister? i hardly know er. there must be a cow caught in a tornado somewhere because the steaks have never been higher. i'll take your evil sister's shoes off without asking and have her toes curling like i dropped a house on her. got her seeing in technicolor. she's waiting at home & she heels when i click three times. i'll get you my pretty. you're a little dog too.
be gentle and patient with
a) who you were
b) who you are now
c) who you are becoming
i always convince myself i dont sound that weird and then i go out in the world and get involved in anything longer than transactional small talk and its like ohhh thats right ive only been hanging out with gay people who speak in riddles
we need more mean butches in media that never reconnect with their feminity and never feel longing for the nuclear life they gave up on. and I mean nowwwwww
AND THEY DONT BECOME COPS
Absent daughter figure
Deadbeat daughter
I propose this year be Two thousand twenty FIX. this year we're fixing shit. If you got a problem fix it right away if you can. As soon as you notice even. Fix shit. Fix your leaky faucet. Clean your shower. Talk to your friends about that thing they do that makes you feel unloved. 202fix
Addams Family Values (1993) | The Devil Wears Prada (2006)
