> pull out illustrated diagram explaining what is objects and what is gambling
> they laugh and say “it’s a good collectible sir”
> look up how to buy a collectible
> its gambling
> #wait are labubu’s blind bags?!
Labubus are blind bags but they’re also blind bags with some of the most insane dark patterns stacked on top. The online store for them has a thing where they tell you what you got the second you order it online so that you can immediately try again if you didn’t get the thing you wanted.
There’s also a shake feature that is designed to encourage you to buy more than one by narrowing down the possibility space on a crate of options so that if you’re hunting a specific model you can verify that it’s guaranteed to be in one of these three IF you buy all three right now!!!!!
When people say that labubus are the beanie babies/troll dolls/furbies of 2025, I feel like perhaps they aren’t considering is that in 1995 if you wanted a beanie baby you just went to the store and bought it and if the store was out you didn’t buy five beanie babies trying to get the one you wanted.
shit like this makes me think it should be illegal for products to randomize their contents. like trading card booster packs should list the cards they contain and popsicle companies should have to print the jokes on the wrapper. possibly an overcorrection on my part. but we do not need to be making more products gambling-like, idk.
I identify the most with the woman who has a green velvet ribbon around her neck and keeps being like “DONT untie my neck ribbon or something really bad will happen” and then her husband unties the ribbon and her head falls off. this is extremely real to me. spent my whole life like “please don’t do this thing to me or really bad stuff will happen” and everyone around me being like “that sounds fake” and doing it anyway. and then my head fell off!
