legit the best trope if you ask me.

So she's, like, your girlfriend?

So, you and her are not...?

Shane accepts that he’ll most likely never know exactly what Ilya said on the phone call, he sat and listened and felt with Ilya, but he’ll never ask.

Ilya trusts that Shane wouldn’t ask, he trusts that Shane wouldn’t try to find out, wouldn’t try to make him explain. He still lets his emotions into his voice and let’s Shane make his own assumptions, if he wants.

Shane will most likely never know what Ilya said, but he’ll get to know Ilya, and whatever Ilya decides to tell or not tell about that time in his life, is okay. It’s Ilya’s to keep or to share.

computer. i’ll believe in anything by wolf parade. loud enough to kill.

she said

bitch I know what you are I know you've had his dick in your mouth I know he is JANE hello Jane/Shane???? You AINT slick. I know the cut and color of your penis and every time you cried as a child why wouldn't I know this piece of incredibly obvious information you dumb fuck

Ilya telling Shane that his mother was funny and beautiful and so sad. That his father was so hard on her. He makes a point to say he doesn’t want Shane to think his mother was weak. She wasn’t.

Because Ilya is his mother’s son.

Opening up about Irina is like peeling back flesh to expose bone. It’s admitting his own fears. He sees so much of his mother in himself, and it terrifies him.

And this moment is Ilya finally giving Shane that honesty he asked for — to tell him about the one person in his family who he loved and loved him back — but it’s also a warning with a hidden plea.

Ilya is funny and beautiful and so sad. His father was so hard on him. But please don’t think he’s weak. He’s not.

Thing is, i do believe Ilya when he says that Irina didn't suck like the rest of his family. Whether from reading the book or watching the show, i believe him.

The proof? Ilya.

He's gentle and respectful of consent and boundaries, he never made shane feel uncomfortable for how he folds clothes before hooking up even though he did find it amusing, or how shane felt uncomfortable with so many windows even tho they were on one of the higher floors, mind you that at that point their feelings for each other weren't nearly as intense as its been later.

But he's also funny and made shane laugh alot even when he was uptight and nervous, ragebaity on the ice yes (he's still a hockey player after all) but he's a good captain and knows how to uplift his team whether its with jokes or speeches that made ME want to win their game lmao, he's always there for other people's important moment ie after scott came out and his speech at the awards (when he met scott at the bar, in the books).

Its so obvious how caring he is at the hospital scene too, he went to check on shane while also mentioning how marleau feels bad for what happened and wanted shane to know that. In episode six, reassuring shane when his dad found them, told shane he'd of course go with him to his family with zero hesitation, was there for shane as just a quiet support until shane really needed him while panicking and ilya immediately jumped in to reassure him.

But, he also cared for his father who was absolutely terrible to him and his mother, whom he FOUND when she committed (thats an entire trauma of its own). He spent his summers in russia taking care of his father, when he was away he was sending an absurd amount of money over, made sure they eat the best of food and wear the best of clothes in the hopes that it would be good enough but it wasn't and yet, and YET he still took care of them. Even after his father died and his brother being an ass, he's leaving money for his niece because none of this is her fault. It also broke me how emotional he got when shane talked about the foundations he wants to donate too and his plan like, after all this time taking care of others he got shane (and the hollanders) taking care of him and making future plans with him in mind and it got to him.

But he's also polite and respectful, he smiled at the nurse and said thank you, apologized to the bartender for his team being idiots, in episode six he's respectful of shane's family and dug into the food happily and said thank you for it later and also complimented the vodka they brought out. He played with the children at the all star weekend so beautifully and made them laugh and for god's sake! He likes to spread joy.

So yeah i do believe that she was beautiful and funny because, even though it was for only twelve years, she raised him! and he is exactly the way he describes her. Strong and beautiful and funny despite the circumstances.

He's proof that being kind is a choice you actively make every single day, that even with a shit upbringing or circumstances you can still be a good person because you choose to be. But also even though his mom left the battle at the end, she still powered through just like he is. Except he has Shane to be there for him while he fights his fight.

You can never make me hate Ilya Rozanov.

you know what is sending me into a spiral? the fact that ilya didn’t want to go back to russia, the fact that on the phone he said he wanted to cut the ties and he feels so empty, so hollowed out by that place and that family. and then shane, who doesn’t speak a word of russian, gives him the way out he needed. the way out he craved. without even needing to hear him say it in english. come to the cottage this summer. be with me. don’t go back to russia.

shane: since our rookie season

ilya: i didn’t set up an ad campaign with the two of us together, call you pretty, tease you in the shower, and then almost get caught by your mom in the elevator for you to get our anniversary wrong. since summer before, shane

I need to talk about the couch scene in heated rivalry because, while heartbreaking, it is also a perfect example of how to do a miscommunication trope because of the one hand Shane and Ilya are talking, but they're having two different conversations.

Ilya is genuinely trying to get to know Shane. He wanted him to stay, a cooked for him, made sure he had his beverage of choice and then started asking him questions about himself. Ilya wanted to know if Shane was bi like him or gay because "I never see you with girls" while also trying to tell him that, yes, he has lots of meaningless sex, but it's different with Shane, "I like you."

But Shane hears this and thinks Ilya means that he's just one of the many meaningless hook-ups that he has. And on top of that Shane is freaking out because I don't think anyone has ever outright asked him about his sexuality. The sexuality that he, himself, has very much not come to terms with "of course I do" he says, because he still thinks he can do that. Can be with a girl and be okay with it.

It's like they're both reaching a hand out to test the waters but they're reaching into separate pools. It crushes me because you can see them both trying so hard but they just don't understand each other yet.

ilya: *fucks shane like there’s no tommorow and makes sure shane has the best first time imaginable AND makes shane come hands free*

shane: now the bed is all dirty :/

ilya: *who is so in love with this clearly autistic man and still can’t believe that’s the first thing on shane’s mind after mind blowing sex* what? 🫥

You don't see that every day. Pretty big night for hockey.

#ShaneHollanderHockeyPlayer

dj, put that fag shit on

He had been reeled in by this annoying Canadian, and all that he knew was that he wanted to stay. He wanted to anchor himself to Shane and just...stay.