best horror movie of the year

is this A24

reblog to microwave them faster

the speed of 20 reblogs... what could 100 do...

THE POWER OF 100 REBLOGS…!

GUYS STOP THEY'RE GETTING DIZZY

[it might be a while before the power increases because the microwaver (me) didn't expect y'all to want to rotate them so badly lolol]

THIS IS TOO MUCH

OH GOD

The people demand more rotation!

HE'S COME TO COLLECT.

of the Devil - Episode 2 launches December 18th.

Check out all the new screenshots and Wishlist Now

“average person eats 3 spiders a year” factoid actualy just statistical error. average person eats 0 spiders per year. Spiders Georg, who lives in cave & eats over 10,000 each day, is an outlier adn should not have been counted

#tapping the reblog button with utmost care because i’m handling a historical artifact (via @malarkiness)

holy shit OP is not only still active but is still making absolutely banger posts in this exact style 11 years later

A 2025 update

100 likes!

@avhira i dare you not to liek this one…

I'll reblog it instead

U cant like

So ur spam rebloging instead??????

Thank you @avhira and everyone who got me to 250 reblogs!

That was the fucking set text

:D

If i say sorry will you stop

Nope!

HEY EVERYONE

NOTE GAME!

For every 50 notes, I'll work 5 minutes on my room!

Every 100 notes, I'll work on a drawing!

If we get to 1000, I'll expose another sideblog!

@moths-and-crows @idiotobsessedwithcats @liminal-core @blood-loving-leech @emmamem13 @this-is-where-i-hide-my-bullshit @otiksimr @demonixoverlord @froggie-draws @jaypethecrispycriptidxd @linuxealcipher @mildly-cold-grape @miss-este-eye @super-big-naturals @critterofthenight @sockssketchingshack @lovelyy-and-lost @fish-without-legs @the-queen-of-geese

Go my mice.

Terrorize this tumbler user.

🔁 and ❤️ to reveal a never-before-seen cast member from of the Devil - Episode 2!

Bonus points if you reblog with a reason why you're excited for MORE OF THE DEVIL!!!

A Formal Announcement

We’ll be taking a break from our usual format today because i have something very serious to talk about.

I need to apologize. So let’s start from the beginning.

A few weeks ago, i entered into a business transaction with the e-merchant known as leetle. i paid them a fair market price, and in return they sent me a download link for a package of subroutines intended to protect me and my data as i traversed the oldnet.

Now, my initial experience with this product was positive. Almost all of the features worked as advertised, with little to no difficulties in set-up. However, there was an incident, which many of you might remember, wherein the package failed to properly encrypt my data, and information that should’ve been kept confidential was visible to all.

This made me upset, there’s no denying it. i had very strong negative feelings about this experience, and so i went and spoke in haste, and anger, and said some very not nice things about leetle.

i did attempt to contact leetle at that time, but due to what i now know were unavoidable personal circumstances, they were not available at any of the contact info i had for them. And in the absence of any explanation from them, i assumed the worst; that they were a scam artist, and a fake, and a charlatan, and someone who had taken advantage of me. And i said as much, here on this blog.

And that’s one of my biggest regrets. Because leetle and i had a very, almost immediate, strong connection at the start. And i almost ruined that because i was impatient.

Fast-forward to last week. One of you, my loyal readers, directed me to a page where leetle was actively promoting their services. And initially, there was some (understandable) confusion on my part, because i knew them under various aliases including little_net_merchant2, but they were operating under the name leetlenetmerchant (no spaces or numbers). So it was hard for me to process what i was seeing, and i again acted rashly, and made an inappropriate threat towards them.

But leetle was kind enough to receive me with grace, and open up a dialogue. During that conversation, they candidly and freely apologized for any issues that i might’ve run into, and they took the time to explain how my misunderstanding might’ve led to the negative user experience i had.

What leetle explained to me was that the encryption package they sold me, while robust and powerful, could be interfered with if prior installations of subroutines weren’t properly vetted. With leetles help, i was able to reset my setup so that all of their highly-tuned subroutines would be able to work together flawlessly. Now my machine is running on 100% leetle approved software, and performing better than ever. They even offered me a discount on this service.

i want to use this space to publicly thank leetle, and clear their good name. I’m really glad to be able to call them a friend, and i’m so grateful that they were willing to forgive me for my errors.

As we all turn over a new leaf and begin this new chapter in our relationship, i’d like to express my completely renewed faith in leetle and their products with a show of good will.

i’ll now take full advantage of their sophisticated encryption code to 100% safeguard the deeply personal secret that i’m about to divulge. i wouldn’t feel comfortable doing this in any other way, with any other software engineer.

But sometimes, a leap of faith is the only way forward.

[.executePackage with key = true]

i still sleep with a stuffed animal. i don’t hug it for security or anything like that, but i sleep better when it’s in bed with me, so what’s the harm?

[.terminatePackage()]

Thank you all, and thank you leetle for your grace, patience, and kindness.

Your nightowl

Lbh tbg fpnzzrq ntnva.

Translation:

"You got scammed again."

Your Nightowl#013

i learned what a bastard is today. It was one hell of a rabbit hole.

These two jerks were arguing with each other- i don’t know why, it started, but with them its always something petty and dumb. (¬_¬")  The whole class was just watching them (me included) in a pretty bored way, cause we’ve seen this before and it never goes further than namecalling. But then jerk A called jerk B a Bastard, and the whole mood shifted. Everyone else in class sat a little straighter. Eyes started darting around, looking for an adult to come and intervene. Jerk B got real red and pale at the same time, and i could see veins on his forehead from across the room. i thought he  was gonna hit the other guy. ( o_o)

But then he just walked out real fast.

Bastard’s not exactly a common insult, but it isn’t rare either- and it’s really not that bad. i couldn’t understand why everyone was so static, but i knew it wasn’t right for me to just start asking. So i did what i usually do instead of engaging in the moment- i went and did some research.  (⌐▨_▨)

First, some context- jerk B wasn’t raised by his parents; they’re dead. His family took care of him (well literally he was taken care of by a swathe of maids and butlers and Ads and whatever, but you know what i mean). He never knew his parents, but its still a dick move to bring them up during an argument over something petty and dumb (and remember, with these two, It Is Always Petty and Dumb).

Second, some historical context- Bastard originally meant someone born to parents who were not wed to each other. Obviously, not something anyone gives a shit about today, but for most of our recorded history, it was.

The term also more generally means anything of questionable origin, like a bastardized copy, or an inferior version. It was also sometimes used to describe an illegitimate heir.

All of those definitions are relevant here.

People have been freezing their eggs for a long time now. It’s less common, but people freeze their sperm, too. And when people die, their gametes aren’t always destroyed. It’s incredibly rare, and widely frowned upon, but if you have the rights it is entirely legal to make a child from two people’s DNA without their consent. 

And it’s even possible to make a child from two people who are dead.

It’s possible…but why would you, right? There’s no shortage of DNA to go around. Why would you want the DNA of some dead person?

The answer to that depends a lot on how their will was set up.

Imagine your rich as hell aunt and uncle pass away. They never had kids of their own, so they give you a little something…and give the lion’s share away to charity. The story should end there- “Maybe i should’ve sucked up to them more while they were still kicking, oh well, i better move on,” but then you get a message from a biocorp. 

“Sorry for your loss, standard copy, standard copy… hey, we’ve still got your rich fam’s gametes in the freezer. Wanna make some money?”

So that’s what Jerk A was calling Jerk B- not an asshole, but a Bastard Heir. A designer baby cooked up by his screwed-in-the-head relatives after his parents had already died. A person born just so that their “guardians” could rob their parent’s graves. An illegitimate knock-off of what a child is supposed to be.

(O∆O), right?

Jerk B’s parents died when he was two, so the accusation is total bullshit. But i can understand why he got so mad. He’s probably not still sore about his parents deaths’, not after so long, and not when he doesn’t remember them. But it’s nasty to imply that his family only cares for him because they can use him to control his parents fortune.

And that implication could actually be true.

wincing as i type,

Your nightowl

Sbhaq fbzrguvat lbh zvtug or vagrerfgrq va: leetlenetmechant.shop

Translation:

"Found something you might be interested in: leetlenetmechant.shop"

Your NightOwl #007

After i had a not very fun encounter with that fellow lurker the other day, i started brainstorming about what i could do to be better prepared. There’s lots of protective subroutines out there, but they’re all designed for the modern darknet. i had hoped there might be some overlap, but it seems like the differences are even bigger than i thought.

The problem is the difference in intent.

The internet we use now was built for consumers and consumerism. It’s designed to be easy to use, easy to navigate, and as flexible as possible. The darknet we have (if you can call it that) is just the occasional, forgotten tepid pool at the bottom of the cistern that a few unsavory types can gather in, to trade data in (relative) privacy. It’s small and very scattered- If they want to send anything around the world, they have to put it on physical drives and put those drives on a plane, and hope they’ll get plugged back in to the right darknet waiting for them on the other side of the globe. 

All of which is about as glamorous as trafficking fish back and forth from the pet store, if you ask me.

But the oldnet was built for data first and people second. All the usability and ease of access, all the user interfaces and search engines were added later. The “deep web” was there first, and it never went away, so the hidden side of things was always so much bigger than lusers ever imagined.

That deep web’s still here, but it’s lost a lot of its meaning. Now that the oldnet’s abandoned, the difference between it’s various layers and their depths don’t seem to matter very much. It’s /all/ dark and murky back here- some parts are just further away from the surface than others.

So, if the oldnet is its own microcosm, and i want to carry protection, i’ll have to find it here, right?

Enter my new contact, “leetle”. For a very reasonable fee, they sold me a subroutine package that’ll keep my address secure, my setup vaccinated, and my data as heavily or lightly encrypted as i please.

I’m taking it for a test spin right now.

[.executePackage with key = true]

How’s this? Frustrating, isn’t it? To not be able to decode what I’m typing here? i could be spilling all kinds of secrets and no one would be the wiser. Best of all, it looks normal to me, so I won’t embarrass myself by leaving behind any typos

For myself to find, I guess, since no one’s reading this

huh

okay well i might as well leave one real secret here while i’ve got the chance:

i lied to Ana about not being genetically compatible with Mods. My parents would just never allow it.

And i happen to look good in my glasses, Lindsey, so not spending my whole adult life walking around with leds for eyeballs isn’t nearly as tragic as you made it sound

[.terminatePackage()]

Pretty neat, huh?

Flying under cover of night with none the wiser,

Your nightowl

ᕙ(  •̀ v •́  )ᕗ

Lbh jrer fpnzzrq.

Translation:

"You were scammed."

Your NightOwl #006

i finally made first contact. It was a lot less romantic than i imagined. 

i was just wandering around like usual, exploring the dead and decaying sites, picking through the refuse. It had been a long day and i wasn’t feeling particularly lucky. i figured i’d call it quits after checking out this shopping site, since it was relatively in-tact and i really didn’t want to stumble back out into the dark again. 

The first thing that struck me were the prices. i know that inflation is real, and the currency’s different, but even adjusting for all that, the clothes were astonishingly cheap. They looked pretty good in the images, too, so i really don’t know how the math worked out. Maybe clothes were just really cheap to make back then.

Anyway, i suddenly got a ping. A text box initialized with an old-fashioned, hyper-bare-bones chat window- And in it, an Alpha Indigo/dt reached out to me.

The conversation wasn’t very long.

i barely got my first question in before some asshole jumped me and chased me all the way back out the network like a madman. Once i was out, they slammed the door on me, loudly. Here i was all doubly-excited at meeting my first real Alpha Indigo/dt, AND talking to my first other user. Just my luck that the first person i run into back here is an a-social a-hole.

Though i guess i shouldn’t expect to find a lot of friendly, open, social butterflies hiding on the old net.

For a parting gift, they even sent a worm after me to try and brick all my screengrabs- but i was the better hacker this time.

Not really. My automated scripts took care of it without me having to do anything, and i copied those wholesale from a starter kit. So it was less that i was the better hacker, and more that the other guy was using really outdated tools.

Like we’re both spelunkers, but they’re using candles and i’ve got flashlights.

i’ve posted the whole convo below- just don’t expect a lengthy read.

And don’t expect us to become pen-pals. That other user made it very clear that i wasn’t welcome back anytime soon.

licking my wounds (heroically),

your night owl

^(◕_>_◕) ^

Thrff lbh zrg Pebbx. Pebbx’f na nffubyr gb rirelobql, fb ng yrnfg gnxr pbzsbeg gung vg jnfa’g crefbany. Gung orvat fnvq, lbh’ir tbg ab evtug gb pbzcynva nobhg uvf ynpx bs ubfcvgnyvgl jura lbh’er abfvat nebhaq yvxr gung. Oryvrir vg be abg, abg rirelbar nccerpvngrf lbhe phevbfvgl. Whfg or fher gb tvir uvz naq uvf n jvqr oregu. Ur znxrf sbe n cerggl pvivy arvtuobe, nyy gbyq- Fb ybat nf lbh fgnl bhg bs fvtug.

Translation:

"Guess you met Crook. Crook’s an asshole to everybody, so at least take comfort that it wasn’t personal. That being said, you’ve got no right to complain about his lack of hospitality when you’re nosing around like that. Believe it or not, not everyone appreciates your curiosity. Just be sure to give him and his a wide berth. He makes for a pretty civil neighbor, all told- So long as you stay out of sight."

Your NightOwl #004

What am i actually gonna do when i grow up?

My parents gen had it lucky. They could choose between state operative, corporate operative, or purged political dissident. i’ve got a lot less to choose from. Basically any service industry job i can think of, an automated dependent can do it better and cheaper than I ever could.

So i’m putting together a list. Based on current trends and also just my guesses, i’ll list all the jobs that could still exist by the time I’m old enough to apply. Here goes:

Translator

Chauffeur

Chef

Cyberpunk

Writer

No luck with decoding last week’s message from the Big Bad. I think the R is important, but the cipher’s definitely more than one letter long.

I tried turning it on its side and it kind of looks like a hair pin. 

Hair pins can pick locks (in old movies and stuff).

And locks require keys.

And that’s where I ran out of ideas. See below for more details on my hitting a wall.

Dejected and tired,

your nightowl

zzzΣ(￣V￣ノ)

Vg’f abg n unvecva. Lbh jrer pybfre orsber lbh ghearq vg pybpxjvfr. Naq ol gur jnl, jubrire fnlf Ybob’f gur ynfg plorechax vf cneg bs cfl-bc. Ab bar pna or gung unezshyyl fghcvq ol nppvqrag.

Translation:

"It’s not a hairpin. You were closer before you turned it clockwise. And by the way, whoever says Lobo’s the last cyberpunk is part of psy-op. No one can be that harmfully stupid by accident."

Your NightOwl #003

i saw a ghost today and it made me a nihilist.

Dramatic, i know, but how would you describe the following (if you were also trying to write a good blog):

Over the weekend </3 unalived another victim. When word got out, her id got leaked and soon her face was everywhere- underneath a heavy-handed political message.

Over the course of a few hours, she had gone from being a person, to being a victim. Then, they had gone from victim to symbol, from symbol to strawman, to punching bag, to false-flag operator, to meme, to whatever you wanted her to be. 

Not the most dignified funerary procession. If you judge our society by how well we handle death, we’d get a failing grade.

Well, what would actually happen is that we’d be given a Gentleman’s C.

But after watching that parade pass me by on every social i could thumb over to, 

i saw her. Alive, healthy, happy. 

In an insurance commercial.

If </3 was out and about over the weekend, they didn’t leave any b0dies in their wake. There were no sh00tings and no d3aths. The poster, the victim, it was all fake.

It’s actually more fake than a fake: it’s a mock-up made by a politically specialized PR-marketing-firm-monstrosity; their “take” on what a good political advertisement could look like in the age of </3.

They say that it was meant for internal use only, and got leaked through some kind of corporate-espionage sleeper-employee bs. i believe them, but only because the fallout’s been such an entertaining disaster for anyone with a sense of humor (and a hatred for corps (and their ugly-as-hell homepages)).

My personal favorite wrinkle in the story: Their initial statement claimed that the woman they used in the “internal document” was just a “theoretical victim” that their graphic design department “generated algorithmically”. Then, they had to turn around and admit that someone just slapped a few filters on some stock-footage actress’ headshots and they hadn’t actually used any kind of “algorithm”  for anything. And THEN they had to admit that the actress in question wasn’t a real person at all but was actually a “virtual personage” owned by the stock-footage database. And THEN they had to admit that they hadn’t actually purchased her license before “using her likeness in creative ideation”. 

Okay so not a singular wrinkle, but still.

So. what looked like a horrific sh00ting turned out to be the best corporate trainwreck in months. 

Thank god.

i wish that more could come of it than just a laugh. There won’t be reflection, or changes, or consequences for anyone. People will claim that they knew it was fake the whole time, or dip under the irony covers and start making conspiracy theories about </3′s “lost victim” or whatever.

i don’t know what it is about </3 that brings out the worst in people, and maybe i never will. i just hope that i’m not the only person noticing it.

But i’m trying to not end these posts on negative notes all the time, so here’s something fun that i’ve been working on: a scrap of L0b0′s manifesto!

Probably a fake, of course, but it’s hard enough to decipher that it might be the real deal. My friend says that since i found it physically printed and in a public place, it’s at least got the basic requirements. i’ve transcribed it in the “Read More” below, so feel free to try and crack it- but you have to share the cipher with me if you do.

good hunting,

your night owl

<(●_v_●)7

Keep reading

Lbh’er ernyyl pebjqfbhepvat guvf?

Rirelbar xabjf gung ybob nyjnlf hfrf gur fnzr raqvat sbe nyy gurve qvfcngpurf. YBOB VF XVAT, evtug? Naq gurl hfr FGBC vafgrnq bs crevbqf. Gurer’f n srj yrggref evtug gurer gb trg lbh fgnegrq.

Orggre lrg, whfg svther bhg gur xrljbeq pvcure.

Ab thnenagrrf, ohg xabjvat Ybob, gung cebonoyl jnfa’g na E ng gur raq lbh “genafpevorq”.

Url, lbh pna ernq guvf, pna’g lbh? Lbh’er abg whfg orvat qrafr?

Translation:

"You’re really crowdsourcing this?

Everyone knows that lobo always uses the same ending for all their dispatches. LOBO IS KING, right? And they use STOP instead of periods. There’s a few letters right there to get you started.

Better yet, just figure out the keyword cipher.

No guarantees, but knowing Lobo, that probably wasn’t an R at the end you “transcribed”.

Hey, you can read this, can’t you? You’re not just being dense?"