holy quaternity
If you went to a bar and the bartender was a mousegirl you could ask for a drink and she would balance it on her head and say "for you, it's on the mouse"
the crazy thing about this is that it took one single word to turn it horny. coulda been a normal cute post. coulda taken the high road & conjured a delightful image of a mouse scampering down the bar with a beer ten times its size balanced on its head. but you had to say "mousegirl" and not "mouse." don't pretend this isn't what's going on either i know the score i know what's up. i'm familiar with this sort of semantic trick. you want to fuck down on an anime girl with certain characteristics of a rodent and everyone's gotta know.
bumped into my neighbor who told me about how when she was mowing she found a praying mantis and while pointing it out to a another neighbor ran into a group of 4 men and also asked if they wanted to see and they enthusiastically agree
so, she takes them to see it and notices that these men are almost giddy over this bug so she starts asking questions and turns out they are from various African countries, are scientists travelling on some sort of research grant, and one of them in particular is specialist in insects and they were all just on their way to their Air B&B
like. Imagine you arrive in this foreign country to study its local bugs, you get off the plane and start walking to where you are staying, and some old lady stops you and is all "hey! Come look at our local bug!"
we’re well into january we need to put fuckedelf back into the christmas decoration box
Dont forget me
i would do anything to forget you you son of a bitch
learning the backstories of any of your female relatives always amounts to taking 500 points of psychological damage and wondering if the world is irredeemably evil
The human body's response to HRT is actually admirable in the sheer indifference. Just pure I Don't Give A Shit, I Just Fucking Work Here compliance to the new instructions. You can get testosterone injected straight into your body and it doesn't even question where that shit came from, coming back from a coffee break and just going
"Okay, everything seems to be in ord- oh fuck now what? Oh huh. Alright fine. New orders came in, cancel the menstrual cycle. Dig up the genetic balding patterns from somewhere, I don't fucking know they're buried somewhere in the dna. I'm greenlighting the growing-hair-on-your-toes thing. Yeah just cancel the ongoing maintenance processes, new orders came in so this is apparently what we're doing now."
Oh, and we need to build a penis. How? No fucking clue, use whatever we've got lying around. We're going to have to McGyver the fuck out of this dick.
at the vet because apparently tylenol decided to eat a joint
she's going to be ok she's just high as fuck
