btw if youre young and scared of doing adult things without your parents ive learned that like 90% of the time you can just tell the doctors office or the dmv "haha sorry ive never done this without help before... can you show me how to do this?" the employee will not care. if that means anything to you

christmas movie where a city girl falls for a cowboy but they're both horny lesbians

After growing up during the I Can Haz Cheeseburger era, I'm glad that we as a society have progressed to the point of understanding that cats' internal narration should be extremely dignified and comically formal for a creature so dumb. They really are like

Sir, I fail to see which part of this situation you could possibly find amusing. Can you not see that I am stuck, trapped onto this couch by my own claw, and shall consequently die?

when i worked at cracker barrel (vision darkens for a moment) we all got custom aprons with our names embroidered on them but not for 90 days bc the barrel isn't gonna invest in custom embroidery if you can't hack it. so until you get your own aprons you wear an apron that says 'rising star' on it. the issue being every single other person who works there is wearing aprons with their real names. so every single day for 3 months customers would be like 'can we get a table for 4? thank you, Rising Star. and what an interesting name!'

Rising Star would genuinely be a very lovely name but it wasn't mine and I did just think it was funny that the power of the Apron Name had such command.

Taking up Japanese as a side project for myself has reminded me of something.

So like a long time ago I had a professor that I absolutely adored. She happened to be Japanese American. She grew up speaking Japanese at home but never really spent a lot of time in Japan. She mostly spoke with other Japanese Americans and read books.

So one day early in her teaching career there’s an exchange student from Japan who’s having a hard time understanding a concept so she explained it to him in Japanese and then he looked absolutely rattled. Like in shock. Pale.

This is how she learned that the way she speaks Japanese makes her sound like a gang member.

Japanese doesn’t exactly have cuss words in the same way as English does but imagine that the nicest professor you’ve ever had pulls your paper over and says “Okay listen here you little piece of shit I’m gonna fucking explain this to you. Violently.”

DO YOU GUYS NOT FUCK WITH THE SKULL OF JUDGEMENT ANYMORE

when boy bands sing a love song addressed to the listener does that imply all 5-10 of them are in love with you at once. that seems like a lot of pressure i don't know if i want to be the nucleus of the boyband polycule.

"BITCH DID I STUTTER?

I WANT TO WATCH SHOWS FEATURING LESBIANS"

Also ahhhhh for a recommendation for an awesome lesbian show to check out, may I recommend Pluribus?

It's incredible and the lead character is a lesbian and the show is a great mix of drama, comedy and dark comedy

whenever i post stupid shit that gets a lot of notes on here that i regret i take comfort in knowing that theres no real repercussions from that because this website is going to be tanked and shutdown within, at the most, 3 years

had a fascinating english class that resulted in the notes header “the forcefeminization of victor frankenstein”

what the people want, the people get

you see

my professor’s take is that mary shelley is feminizing victor throughout the novel, as a way of flipping gender roles and putting a male character through female experiences.

evidence as explained:

Also, Shelley’s mother died in childbirth. It’s interesting, then, that Shelley presents the creation of life as something horrific and damaging. She parallels Victor with her mother.

in conclusion, Frankenstein (1818) by Mary  Wollstonecraft Shelley is one of the first examples of mpreg in English literature 

Mall Part 2: Questions & Concerns (S05E10) ABBOTT ELEMENTARY (2021—)

british towns will be called Fuckmouth or whatever and people will just go with it

obsessed with this

i literally live 10 miles from shitterton and i can confirm that the council had to replace all of their signs with rocks because they kept getting stolen.

im only a level three imagination haver sorry i wouldnt get it

as a level five imagination haver i can only imagine how hard that is for you

rub it in why don't you

people don’t enjoy shipping anymore. the point of shipping isn’t the catharsis of watching them kiss onscreen, it’s grabbing the characters and mashing their faces together like you’re five years old playing Barbie in your room again. it’s to take one moment of eye contact in canon and read that over and over and over again with twenty different writers’ interpretations of the characters internal monologues if they were in love. it’s to see the characters interact and cheer because you know that’s another moment to add to your list of canon compliant fic ideas. you’re stressing yourself out, this is supposed to be fun!

She's so cool guys..

Okay guys, I think we need to acknowledge that maybe we can't call Ronance a 'Black Cat and Golden Retriever' ship anymore

They're both puppies. I don't know if Nancy is necessarily a Golden, but she's something with big ears and a very energetic tail

Girl is vibrating at the thought of making Robin happy here, she'd explode if Robin called her a Good Girl, that's not a Black Cat.

Ok hear me out ..

Robin is very Orange Cat coded, if we want one to be a cat. If not, she is MOST DEFINITELY a gold lab or golden retriever.

Nancy is 100% a Border Collie in my eyes, or a German Shepherd, she would be a working dog and a big one.