Every day feels like sieging enemy castle with no trebuchet

Originally posted by araxiel2051

they cut the basketball open with the machete and out came two babies, glowing bright red like nothing else and we called them glowing and red.and it was a very auspiciuous date on that day

flicking back through my procreate library what the fuck was this

what is the FUCKING POINT then???

me: [to cute chefgirl im chatting up] yeah i used to use a pepper grinder but i realized that it just isn't the same as pepper ground in a mortar and pestle, so i switched back

chefgirl: omg ivy, please tell me more about your pepper preferences after i conveniently go pee [leaves]

me: [to the dog] im gonna be honest i only said that shit cause i left my pepper grinder too close to the stove and it melted. yeah. i dont even have a mortar and pestle i made that pepper by slamming the peppercorns really hard with my knife. yeah. i know.

doggirl: do you need me to be here for this or can i go eavesdrop on her pissing

me: go ahead. i geuss. fuck my stupid faggot life. i guess nobody loves me and my pepper #mypepper

university of lousiville: maybe theyd like your pepper better if it got... a doctorate

My knowledge was called upon

somebuggy

people say dolphins are smart but there not smart enough to not be Shity grey rubber tubes flappin about in the gotdamn ocean

the floating head of wisdom

why do ducklings travel in such an obviously chain-lightning-able formation? are they stupid?

an imp polishes a centipede for imp thursday