You have to love her. You have to love her when she sleeps til noon because she was up late. You have to love her when she doesn’t have the energy to do anything but lay in bed. You have to love her when she didn’t shave today. You have to love her when her thighs are hairy because the sensation of shaving them is too much for her to handle. You have to love her when she spends a day playing games because working is too overwhelming. You have to love her when people assume the worst of her. You have to love her when the world turns against her. You have to love her when she feels powerless and alone and abandoned. You have to love her unconditionally.
You have to love her when she’s plural. You have to love her when she’s little. You have to love her when she’s racialized. You have to love her when her autism isn’t just quirky hyperfixations. You have to love her when her mental health isn’t just #Relatable Internet memes. You have to love her when she’s disabled. You have to love her when she has chronic pain. You have to love her when she needs help with the little things. You have to love her when she’s unemployed, broke, struggling. You have to love her when people ignore her. You have to love her when people talk over her. You have to love her enough to lift her up. You have to love her enough to give her what she needs. You have to love her enough to stand by her no matter what, because no one deserves to be without love.
AND LOVE IS NOT JUST “I love you” EITHER. Love is support. Love is safety. Love isn’t just donating to charity. Love is paying for her to eat when you know she won’t otherwise. Love isn’t just reblogging a positivity post and hoping she’ll see. Love is seeking her out and telling her how much she means and how happy you are that she’s here.
Love is not just love, love is action. If you don’t get that, then you’ve missed the point.
Being the only queer person in a room full of septuagenarians will have you feeling like a snake being passed around a room of elementary schoolers. Nothing makes me feel so much like I’m an ambassador animal as being introduced with, “this is Draconym, she prefers they and them pronouns.”
I’m saying this as someone whose full time job involves introducing snakes to rooms of elementary schoolers. I can tell that my elderly friends are excited to present facts about me to their nervously curious audience in very nearly the same way that I am excited to present snake facts to an audience of nervously curious children. It’s fine. The snakes and I are comfortable with this.
it is a thrill and a privilege to be loved by someone who expresses it primarily through thoughtful care and consideration of your wants and needs and studied observation of your habits and vulnerabilities.
uh ohhh i learned how to make zines and im going to be insufferable now watch out!!!!
i draw myself as a human in a world of little cats bc covid denialism makes me feel like i am living in a different reality than everyone else. i also just like drawing little cats
also v much feel the need to clarify that the “masking only works if everyone does it” mentality is not even true!! yes obviously it is MOST effective when we all do it but anything to break the chain of transmission is worth doing and w a high quality respirator one way masking still reduces your chances of getting covid and passing it onto your loved ones
anyways. live life breathe air i know somehow we’re gonna get there
one of the other shoes that finally dropped for me this summer was the awareness of just how many people with chronic debilitating trauma have no idea that “positive” emotions like compassion, tenderness, kindness, concern, empathy, and even something as simple as the feeling of being regarded as a human being instead of as an object are triggers for feelings of life-threatening anxiety and panic.
it’s that last part that fascinates most these days: the sense of dread and overwhelming fear that takes over people when they realize they aren’t being seen as an object.
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