What even is consistency?

sometimes you have to put your little guy in the Horrible Situation Factory so he can grow. i’m sorry little guy. it’s for the plot.

my humor might be broken cause I find this trend actually funny

amelia bedelia coming back in a big way

mastering ancient breathing techniques in the mountains of china to control my heart rate finely enough to jam out a sick tune on the hospital’s heart monitor

starting a collection

sorry for [remembering a tumblr post about expressing gratitude instead of apologising to make the interaction more positive for the other person] i mean thank you for having a boyfriend who was so easy to run over withmy car and reverse over three times maybe four

wow players having to stand in lines for a quest because a relevant npc can only talk to one player at a time. is the funniest image on the planet

i need to correct this: wow classic doesn’t have any npcs that can only talk to one player at a time. these lines actually formed for a quest npc that players had to kill to complete the objective. knowing that i think this image is even funnier.

Literally this

My favourite is the guy saying, “This is like being at the dmv”

if anyone feels bad that their fic might contain medical inaccuracies, be comforted to know that whatever creative liberties you take with your medical scenes can never be worse than the one I just read. where one character tries to stop the bleeding on their friend's head wound by putting a tourniquet around their neck

it's me and my caffeinated drink against the world

my daily affirmation as an author

*whispers* holy shit. he’s done it again.

*yells* THIS IS THAT TIME HE DID IT WITH POTTERY AND IT FUCKING RULED.

@bisexual-engineer-enby

straight up peak

oh you sweet summer child. you little fucking weewee. you poor motherfucking thing. you idiot. you idiot. oh you incredible edible egg

fuck my gay life. pharmacist asked for my ID when I was picking up my testosterone and instead of my driver’s license, I accidentally grabbed the fool tarot card I keep behind it in my phone case and went to hand that to her

being obsessed with your own ocs is its own kind of torment nexus. "i miss them so much :(((" and they're literally in your brain.

tgis is so fucking funny to me. they accidentally Rock Lee'd a retired racehorse

imagine youre a fat horse and your new neighbour is a personal trainer

horse that reads Marcus Aurelius

I was wrong. they didnt rock lee him. this horse is literally Gai. and i wish he was my dad