if i had a dick i would love to have a disappointing orgasm in the shower while thinking of something or someone that i felt i should not be thinking about & then stand under the water with my forehead against a wall watching the proof of my guilt & shame go down the drain

“i liked it before it was cool” well i liked it AFTER it was cool when everyone abandoned it

Books about polar expeditions are always called All The Dead People Who Died On The Most Deadly Journey Ever At the Poles: the Doomed Final Expedition of John Doomedtodieonaboat Where He Died and the reviews are all like 'wow this story was so gripping I just had no idea what was going to happen to Captain Doomedtodieonaboat'

you were born in 2006? what are you? a Honda Civic?

ANOTHER thing i will say about self-pub/indie media of all kinds is that people are always quick to warn you that to find the good stuff you must first endure a lot of bad stuff you don't enjoy. that qualifier like "oh you will read nine bad things to find one kind of good thing but you must persist". but i don't know what corporate media people are enjoying that has a better hit rate than that. there's corporate media that cost millions to make that's so bad people start weird conspiracies about it. "most of it sucks if you have taste" is not a problem exclusive to self-pub. some of the highest grossing movies of 2025 were "we took that thing you liked and made it live action for some reason". if you clicked a link to a free thing one time and you thought the art was ugly or the acting was bad or it was full of typos i simply cannot bring myself to care about your need to warn people that It Could Happen To Them.

james and the giant pronoun

stop reblogging james and the giant pronoun

you will NEVER be a spooky scary skeleton dancing jn a graveyard playing your bones like a xylophone.

submitted by @transcyberism