nell.fenderbender

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

Intro post!

Hey! I’m Nell and uhhh this is my tumblr?

I’m 15 so nothing too crazy nsfw please and ty

she/they pronouns btw :)

Butch lesbian


Some stuff I LOVE:

music, soccer, playing guitar and singing, the ocean, my band, diy-ing cool stuff, my friends, dyeing my hair, FEMMES YALL HAVE MY HEART, working out, halloween, coffee, monster energy, punk/riot grrrl, flannels, band shirts, posters and stickers, my big baggy man pants, making and getting zines


stuff im a hater for?

hot icky weather, rude ppl, the government, knee injuries, eating fish, chatgpt, changing guitar strings, headphones not being loud enough, bigots, assholes and anyone of the like


Fav band/artists

Hole, Destroy Boys, Cherry Vanilla, Bikini Kill, Green Day, Mannequin Pussy, Sleater-Kinney, The Linda Lindas, Gigi Perez, Nirvana, Be Your Own Pet, Team Dresch, The Butchies, Opal In Sky, etc

Bonus: fav radio station, KEXP (based in Seattle, 90.3 FM I could yap about them forever)


My band is called AquaTofana, our stuff isnt out YET but trust when it is its all anyones gonna be hearing about from me


idk what this account is rlly gonna be yet but yeah welcome to my page ig :)

also i tag pretty much everything with #fenderbender so if you see that then its most likely me yay

Pinned Post intro post introduction hi its me whats up pinned intro fenderbender

more poetry guys do not read this pls 😭

I’m so serious 😭


Your hands on my thighs are burned into my skin, your grip on my neck I still get nightmares from. I’ll never forget it, the total helplessness, frozen instead of fighting like I should’ve. You made me my favorite dinner when I asked. You threw me into the wall and watched me cry. You coached my soccer team for years, you looked at me like you could never love me. You taught me how to fish, your weight pressed on top of me will haunt me forever. You unzipped something and that’s all I remember. You drive me to school and tell me when you’ll pick me up, no “I love yous” but I’m used to it. You make my favorite rice bowl while your yelling still rings in my ears. I have nightmares about you and wake up to your French toast, with my favorite berry sauce on top. I still feel your hands on me, angry, rough, touching me like no father ever should, my thighs red from your grip, lightheaded from crying while you crushed the breath out of me. I remember it all. Do you? 

vent ig? poetry ig fenderbender HAHAHAAH ANYWAYSSSS IM FINE DW SERIOUSLY

its so strange, trying to talk to you. I swear my mood changes every second when it comes to you. You know me in ways I barely even know myself; you don’t know shit about me. We’ve seen so much of each other, yet so little. September seems so far behind us now. I’ll never forget the drops of golden light falling through the trees, the taste of you is so faded now I’ve forgotten it. You’re a world away, you’re standing right in front of me. How the hell did I think that was cute?? When we’re alone, I still become softer, and I hate it. You talk about the ice in my eyes like they’re an ocean frozen over, one you’ll never swim in again. Why did I do that, just to feel loved? Just because I thought it would change something? I’ll never tell you how I really felt. We’ve changed so much, we haven’t changed at all. Since when do you like punk bands? I’m jealous of your confidence, honestly. Can you stop fucking texting my sister? I’ll blame you, but I know it’s my fault she hates me. God, we were so fucked up. There’s so much I didn’t tell you. I know I shouldn’t, but I want to. I want to spit out the words now, get my revenge for biting my tongue until it bled. I want you to know everything. I’ll never tell you anything again. I still remember your favorite colors. You’re too eager to talk to me. Your sister says you want it all back, but honestly, I doubt that. I wish you knew how hard I tried for you. Thank god you never found the note. I keep all your old letters and drawings shoved in a box. Why the hell are you making more? I just wanted you to get better. I just wanted to help. You hate my dad, so I’ll never tell you how similar you two are. I still say hi to your mom. I miss your dog. Stop asking me to give my cat a kiss for you. I never want to hear from you again. I hope you’re doing alright. You have no idea who I am anymore. Neither do I. Do you  think of me when you see the ocean? You still draw my eyes perfectly, but everything else is off now. We would’ve ended eventually. Thank god we did. That whole year is a blur, one I’d rather forget. I finally ran out of my chapstick in the flavor you liked. You kissed my scars, you didn’t even know they were your fault. Maybe you did. If I could take it back, I would. You don’t deserve to know me like that. I probably don’t deserve to know you like that either. Maybe it was so warm because we were on fire, burning out together. I’m so happy you’re leaving. Please stay. I just wanted you to be okay. And I still do. I hope you’re happy now. I hope I am too. 

poetry idk butch lesbian fenderbender