new year new mountain goats

a new year's classic.

I am once again begging you to watch this animated telling of the greatest fan fiction of all time.

Ace Attorney but they are two rats by RoomFullOfRocks

Read by Jacob Andrews of Drawfee

Animated by Arlo Sterling

It's so good.

Y'all. Drawfee is good.

normal ads on normal website

I know right? All the ads on here are so mundane

In an effort to avoid supporting megacorporations, I shall now be posing questions directly to tumblr that I would otherwise have googled.

If Mayonnaise is just eggs and oil, why it creamy?

Because it's also evil

Thanks!

Have scientists figured out what dark matter is yet?

Yup! It’s anything that takes up space, has mass, and is goth.

Wow!

What happens if you eat 23 packages of peeps?

You meet god

Thank goodness!

What's the correct way to eat a banana?

Whole, in one gulp.

Delicious!

Who is the Muffin Man?

Father of the Muffin Boy

Makes sense!

Why is my car making a ker-klunk noise?

Car's haunted

Uh Oh

How to fix a haunted car?

Slam into a priest in a crosswalk going at least forty miles an hour

It worked!

Where does the wax in scented candles go?

into the sky, where it turns into stars

Cool!

Why are weddings so damn expensive?

priest has to pay for medical bills related to haunted car crashing into him

....Ah

ChatGPT WISHES it was this coherent and creative

thinking about Jacob Drawfee and more specifically how He Does Gender because genuinely He Does Gender So Good and I just auhjaebqjebjqndenak

unfortunately i could never be nonchalant because i am not well in the head and also my soul is on fire

req'd by @asingularcatherine

aw no why :( i sneeze so much

text: Sneezing is NEVER normal

I went out the other night with my friend and was like “do you think this shirt would help me pick up women?” And he was like “no what the fuck” and frankly I think he was wrong for that and doesn’t understand the raw power a shirt like this holds. Alas. It was $70 so I didn’t get it. But the energy…immense…

i've been obsessed with this video so i downloaded the video file off of youtube so even if the internet goes down i can always watch frogtimelapse.mp4

The first thing you learn is that Lin Manuel Miranda could be anywhere but you won't know until it's already too late

And the next thing you learn is how cold it can get at night

I love whatever the hells wrong with Lisa Gilroy

Spin the wheel. This is now your highest stat.

Perhaps I am just ill informed… but I have not a clue what this means and feel very threatened

Witchcraft, Wisdom, Death...

Saw this funny post and wanted to draw something w it