I always assume the train will be so boring and I bring seven things to do but then I'm entranced by the wonderful window the entire time

RIP Charlie Kirk

[freeze frame] yeah, that’s not me. I don’t know who that is. [unpause]

war criminal pussy got me acting unwise

Not An Isekai - I Just Straight Up Died

accidentally hit something on the treadmill at my gym and it opened a web browser??

FUCK it was in parallel australia

hey i just wanted to say sorry for party rocking. it wasnt acceptable of me to do that & i hope youre willing to forgive m*(party rocks)* oh my god im so aorry i didnt mean to do that

someone is putting up pictures of me around town and they all say I’m ‘wanted’. which is nice

i’ve been in an ongoing battle to have my insurance cover my prescription, and today i saw my prescription was canceled :( but to my surprise

I was prescribed 60 days of beef at Walgreens?

how come friends always have the hottest moms

Aborted Descartes voice: I would've thought...if I was.

if you were the toriel cosplayer who gave me a blowjob at dragoncon, PLEASE inbox me. i think you took my wallet. it looks like an NES