this is peak humor

fixed it

Old concept finally out of my head

Best fish. Best tree. Unchanged for millennia. No notes

The mayor of Butler, Ohio (population 941) ‘accidentally’ struck a wanted pedophilic rapist with his car as the man attempted to evade the police. Right in front of the rapist’s grandma too. Based on previous news coverage of the rapist in question, he seems to be the local menace. Truly an entertaining read and a breath of fresh air in comparison to the rest of the current news cycle.

here is the news report, with footage of the incident. tbh they condensed facts to make it less ridiculous so I would recommended reading some articles too. Mayor Dingus allegedly exited the vehicle and said “I think I hit something?”

...

His name is Mayor Dingus? In real life?

Yes. Mayor Wesley Dingus. Sitcom mayor name if there ever was one.

https://www.cleveland19.com/2025/07/21/bellville-police-chief-give-new-information-regarding-city-employee-who-hit-man-with-car/

She drinks red bull I drink monster she's cheer captain and i am a lobster

She drinks red bull

I drink monster

She's cheer captain, and

I am a lobster

Waiting for the day

When he'll wake up and find

That what he's looking for

Has been here the whole time

IffookdSEEEEEEdimmawonoondastendoo-

i'm also looking forward to your girlfriend's bottom surgery

^ surgeon whose rare and sickly pet lizard only eats human testicles

^ thats the original image, in case you want to see exactly how fucking vile these bastards are.

(those are signs they confiscated from homeless people they arrested for "panhandling" during the holiday season)

Holy fuck the original is worse

it’s over for me i discovered a weather app map layer that shows wind currents worldwide in real time. i just stared at that for so long.

it looks like a van gogh painting

Oh to be an albatross, drifting, steered by this starry sky

that’s what i’m saying my brother

"The male-male relationships that these 18th-century men desired did not use passionate heterosexual love as their model or language, but instead a masculine relationship of friendship, in which sexual desire was included." - Michel Rey, 1700-1750, Les sodomites créent une mode de vie

FUCKING THANK YOU.

Today's Seal Is: Making Contact With An Unknown Beast

I have never seen "wtf" so clearly expressed on an animals face

He looks so fucking upset I can't breathe

went to an elementaryschool musical production and they started the show with the director saying: "Now there's some very small viewers here today, so just so you know. There will be a scary character later in the show. This is her," and a girl in a kinda scary ghost outfit did a creepy walk across the stage, the stood up straight and did a cheery wave, "but remember, it's just Nina. She's pretending to be scary."

Aaaand i would very much like for horror movies to have that as a little bonus feature you can chose. Let me start a movie with Guillermo del Toro showing me a scary ghost that might jump at me, but don't worry, thats just Doug!

hey, don't cry. marbled polecat, ok?

this little freak keeps sneaking into my garden and rubbing himself all over my flowers??Hello?????

Real, male bees don’t go after flowers they stay home, that freak is a herself

googling ‘bee genders’ as I dictate this post

The more you google bee reproductive biology the more absurd it is that we’re applying the words male and female to them. Their actual genders are worker, drone and queen. The queen is capable of both asexual and sexual reproduction. Bees born of unfertilized eggs become drones that are capable of fertilizing eggs. Bees born of fertilized eggs become workers, but can also potentially become a queen depending on how they are fed during the larval stage.

Use whatever the fuck pronouns you want to describe bees because they’re all equally incorrect projections of human worldview onto an insect species. Bees don’t experience mammalian sexual dimorphism in a biological sense nor do they experience human gender dimorphism in a sociopolitical sense.

diversity win, the freak sneaking into your garden and rubbing themselves all over your flowers does not fit into a human biological or sociopolitical framework of sex and gender!

Not only did I miraculously survive the first assassination you all know about, I also survived the assassination attempt on that other impostor too

The plot thickens

To be clear, False Dmitri VI was called False Dmitri III in America because False Dmitri II, III, and V were Japan only.

Let's be fair, the Rock is capable of solid line delivery and emotional acting, it's just that he always try stay in his comfort zone of "cool badass action hero" and won't allow his characters to show physical or emotional weakness, limiting his performances.

The Rock has the potential to be a great actor, but his ego is holding him back.

Funny enough I think that’s more scathing

How could you forget this legend?

Hehehe