sparklejamesysparkle:

“𝐏𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐚𝐲: ‘𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐲𝐨𝐮'𝐫𝐞 𝐠𝐨𝐧𝐧𝐚 𝐛𝐞 𝟖𝟎 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬 𝐨𝐥𝐝.’ 𝐖𝐞𝐥𝐥, 𝐬𝐨 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭? 𝐋𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐚𝐭 𝐚𝐥𝐥 𝐈'𝐯𝐞 𝐝𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐢𝐧 𝟖𝟎 𝐲𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐬! 𝐈 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐥𝐢𝐤𝐞 𝐈'𝐦 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐠𝐞𝐭𝐭𝐢𝐧’ 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐞𝐝! 𝐈'𝐦 𝐚𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐨𝐢𝐧𝐭 𝐢𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐡𝐞𝐫𝐞 𝐈 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐜𝐚𝐧 𝐛𝐞 𝐜𝐚𝐫𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐝 𝐨𝐧. 𝐈'𝐦 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐝 𝐨𝐟 𝐦𝐲 𝐥𝐞𝐠𝐚𝐜𝐲 𝐬𝐨 𝐟𝐚𝐫, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐢𝐧𝐮𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐝𝐨 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐧𝐠𝐬 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐦𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐛𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐮𝐬𝐞 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐫 𝐩𝐞𝐨𝐩𝐥𝐞. 𝐈'𝐯𝐞 𝐡𝐚𝐝 𝐭𝐨 𝐰𝐞𝐚𝐫 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭 𝐨𝐧 𝐦𝐲 𝐬𝐥𝐞𝐞𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐚 𝐥𝐨𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐢𝐦𝐞 𝐧𝐨𝐰, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐈 𝐜𝐫𝐲 𝐞𝐚𝐬𝐢𝐞𝐫 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐧 𝐈 𝐮𝐬𝐞𝐝 𝐭𝐨. 𝐁𝐮𝐭 𝐢𝐭'𝐬 𝐣𝐮𝐬𝐭 𝐥𝐞𝐚𝐯𝐢𝐧’ 𝐲𝐨𝐮𝐫 𝐥𝐢𝐟𝐞 𝐰𝐢𝐝𝐞 𝐨𝐩𝐞𝐧 𝐟𝐨𝐫 𝐞𝐯𝐞𝐫𝐲𝐛𝐨𝐝𝐲 𝐭𝐨 𝐥𝐨𝐨𝐤 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐭𝐡𝐫𝐨𝐮𝐠𝐡 𝐲𝐨𝐮, 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐫𝐢𝐠𝐡𝐭 𝐢𝐧𝐭𝐨 𝐲𝐨𝐮. 𝐈 𝐡𝐨𝐩𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐞𝐲 𝐬𝐞𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐡𝐞𝐚𝐫𝐭.” -𝐃𝐨𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐏𝐚𝐫𝐭𝐨𝐧

🦋Wishing a very happy 80th birthday to beloved music legend, song-writer, actress, author, literacy advocate, lgbtq+ ally and international treasure Dolly Parton, born on January 19th, 1946 in a tiny one-room log cabin built on the banks of the Little Pigeon River in Pittman Center, Tennessee. Dolly’s Imagination Library, founded in 1995, has given over 300,000,000 free books to children in America, Canada, Australia, the United Kingdom, and the Republic of Ireland, with Dolly stating: “When I was growing up in the hills of East Tennessee, I knew my dreams would come true. I know there are children in your community with their own dreams. The seeds of these dreams are often found in books and the seeds you help plant in your community can grow across the world.”🦋

Gifs of Dolly from the premiere episode of the Dolly variety series, originally broadcast by ABC on September 27th, 1987, and also from various red carpet appearances Dolly’s made in recent years.

(via coffeegleek)

dogpuppy:

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carne-asada-fries:

elminx:

aesethewitch:

paulgadzikowski:

stephaniematurin:

madgastronomer:

samiholloway:

fairykukla:

netherworldpost:

We need more holidays.

Everyone make up a holiday, please.

My first entry is going to be Deluxe Brunch Goblins where we dress up in an outfit that we have wanted to wear for awhile (and/or an old favorite) and eat breakfast food for a few hours and talk about goblins.

Sometimes in August (northern hemisphere):

Skinny Dipping Night.

Just what it says on the label.

Two from my friend group:

Midnight Pie Society: you go find and eat pie in the company of your favorite people at midnight

Aveomas: in which you celebrate having not been eaten by giant birds for another year. Set sometime during all the sales after the more typical winter holidays, and celebrated with bargain shopping and consuming of Smaller Birds.

Bookiversary: A moveable feast, per person, as it is the anniversary of the publication day of one’s favorite book. Any person can celebrate it multiple times per years, for each of their favorite books.

The anniversary of moving to where you call home. Or the anniversary of finally leaving the place that wasn’t home.

When I was in the habit most years of throwing a party on the anniversary of my first daily cartoon, I called it Anniversarial Cartoon-Remembrance-Oriented Nearly Yearly Meeting. Or ACRONYM

Happy Leaf Crunch Day: the first day of the year when I step on a fallen leaf and it gives a loud and satisfying crunch!

For you Northerners: Sun Day, which I celebrate in early spring on the first day the UV index reaches 3 or higher.

The day that I adopted my critter. <3

(via netherworldpost)

fatestayyuri:

i know why they don’t do it but i really would like a proper block function on youtube. not just the “don’t recommend me this video for the next 2 days if you feel like it🥺” function that exists i mean never seeing that channel ever again. no videos no collabs with other channels just completely blasted out of existence

(via thicque)

lunammoon:

I love how Franky was like “Yo, Twilight needs our top agents so he can play pretend with his daughter in an abandoned theme park” and the agency was like “absolutely no follow up questions. This is top priority. Every single spy stop what you’re doing and help give his daughter the special-est evening ever”. And even better is that none of the spies were grumpy about it they were all like “fuck yeah, let’s do it”

(via artianaiolanthe)

funeralheart-deactivated2023061:

girls love castles and swords and runes and sigils

(via loquaciousmendicant)

merimaybe:

byjove:

cheese-wiz-for-bones:

byjove:

my mom brought her ILL-BEHAVED, UNWASHED DOG into our HARMONIOUS HOME

that is the most black cat looking black cat i’ve seen in my life, good for them.

she has been practicing since she was very young

What a dignified and shapely beast…

(via wizardarchetypes)

targetedknowledge:

(via wizardarchetypes)

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

felikatze:

URGH. Emmerich Holyblade and I just went to The Ceremony to receive our RPG Job Titles, and he OBVIOUSLY got Chosen Hero Sword Saint. So now he’s gonna set out to kill the Demon Lord of Darkness.

Me? I just got Dark Mage. Honestly, it’s pretty rare, but the job opportunities are also limited. You either get into covert assassination or dungeon raiding.

God, just because we’re the only two kids in The Village, Emmerich Holyblade automatically assumes this makes us friends. He doesn’t even realize I hate him and his stupid smug swordsman ass.

URGGHHHH he just asked me to join his Grand Hero’s Party. fuck. I can’t just say no if the Grand Holy King himself is gonna payroll us to do this shit. Whatever man. Let’s rock till the Demon Lord of Darkness is dead, and then I can retire and never see Emmerich Holyblade again.

Help me. I’ve been trying to quit the Grand Hero’s Party but Emmerich keeps introducing me as his childhood friend to all the new fucking party members. I hate them all.

The tank Ferron Shieldson gives me bro fists hard enough to bruise. Sister Savantha Healier has tripped over her habit ten times in the past hour.

Elfdame Woodsworth the beautiful elf archer huntress keeps dragging deer carcasses to camp. I’m so tired of venison.

I’ve been trying to have the Grand Hero’s Party kick me out, but instead of undervaluing my Super Secret Invisible Debuff Technique (which looks like I’m just standing there) Emmerich Holyblade figured out it stacks with his Five Phoenix Absolution to hit the damage cap.

Outside of combat, I’ve done a lot of very invisible low-tier work nobody really needs, such as managing all of our finances and inventory, yet they keep fucking including me and praising my efforts when they’re having a drink at the tavern.

Emmerich Holyblade spilled some beer on my shadowy cloak when he slung an arm around my shoulder. His breath stinks.

I’m so tired of camping, honestly. Random Farmers and Shit keep inviting us to stay with them for the night, but their beds suck and I hate the food.

Our reputation really soared when we stopped one of the Four Demonic Kings of the East North South and West from destroying Capital City of the Holy Church Kingdom Nation.

Emmerich Holyblade insists my 70% Paralysis Debuff clutched the entire encounter despite dealing the Super Cool Omega Finisher, so everyone’s asking me for autographs.

Shouldn’t he know I hate social interaction if he claims to be my “childhood friend”?? LEAVE ME ALONE.

At least Princess Dowed Verily only has eyes for Emmerich Holyblade and his stupidly sculpted biceps. Weird he insists on ignoring her advances, though. Dude, you could be King. What the hell.

Emmerich Holyblade truly is the worst. Princess Dowed Verily tried to have me exiled before the whole court, saying I’m just a leech on the Grand Hero’s Party besmirching my “childhood friend”’s good name and status, but Emmerich Holyblade fucking defended me!!!

He said I’m invaluable to this party both as part of our battle plans, our day-to-day tasks, and as his “dearest companion”. GROSS!!!

Doesn’t he realize this was the PERFECT chance for me to disappear to another country???

Why did I think this Demon Lord of Darkness-slaying shit was a good idea in the first place?? Surely Emmerich Holyblade’s boundless enthusiasm to be a do-gooder can’t be an infectious disease??

Another day, another trial. We journeyed to the Yggdrasil Holy Nature Origin Forest because it’s said the Elves of the Yggrasil Holy Nature Origin Worldtree have the sacred sword Swordexcaliburn, the only weapon capable of permanently killing the Demon Lord of Darkness for good.

Except Elfsdame Woodsworth might be the Holy Nature Origin Princess, or something. I wasn’t really paying attention to her dramatic backstory.

After we killed the Holy Nature Origin King (who was really one of the Four Demonic Kings of the East North South and West in disguise), Elfsdame Woodsworth the beautiful elf archer huntress just kinda gave us the sword.

It’s sunset right now, and I climbed a tree to just overlook the forest in peace, ALONE, except Emmerich Holyblade “knew I’d do something like this”, so now he’s HERE. HE ALWAYS DOES THIS!!!!

Blergh. Now we’re watching the sun set over the whole Holy Kingdom Church Nation. It’s pretty, but that dumbass Emmerich Holyblade isn’t even looking at it. Idiot.

At least he’s being quiet.

By the way, we beat up the other two Four Demonic Kings of the East North South and West, because we don’t really have the time to show all this onscreen, you know? Nobody really cares about them anyways.

We’ve reached the Demon Lord of Darkness’s Dark Demonic Castle Keep now, and we’re striking tomorrow.

It’s my last chance to quit if I don’t want to beef it tomorrow (I do not trust Ferron Shieldson to shield me), but Emmerich Holyblade said he can’t do it without me. HE, singular?? So everybody else can do it without me??

And to make matters worse, he said he’d tell me something after we beat the Demon Lord of Darkness. Why the hell tell me you’re gonna tell me something??? Just tell me in the first place so I can ditch.

And besides, as if anyone could actually kill the goddamn Chosen Hero Sword Saint. At the very least, he’s gonna survive tomorrow. Doesn’t he realize how stupidly contrived his powerset is?? Dude, as IF.

I told him that, and he ran off. I’m never going to understand him.

One more day, and I’m leaving forever. Grand Holy King better pay up good, or I’m covert assassinating his ass.

Inside the Dark Demon Castle Keep, we had to fight through so many waves of enemies, like Sister Savantha Healier’s Evil Twin, who worships the Demon Lord of Darkness instead of the Goddess of Good Stuff.

But mainly I was just standing in the back. Debuffing is a crazy magic drain, so I did get super tired, but the most exciting thing I was involved with was when Sister Savantha Healier’s Evil Twin threw her weapon at me in a last ditch attempt to take at least one of us down, but Emmerich Holyblade intercepted it. With his body.

Sister Savantha Healier just healed him after, though, so it’s fine. I might’ve been mincemeat had that hit my squishy self. I’m a proud backliner, okay. But it was still pretty stupid and unnecessary, considering we have Phoenix Blessing Revival Potion Stones.

Demon Lord of Darkness up ahead… Just one more boss and we’re doooooone.

Anyways, the Demon Lord of Darkness wasn’t even that cool. The orchestra was great though. I gotta see if the piano player survived the Dark Demon Castle Keep’s collapse.

Everybody weakened the Demon Lord of Darkness with their own strikes, so Emmerich Holyblade could finish him off properly with the holy sword Swordexcaliburn.

Before he did, he looked at me with these fucking… star-filled eyes and bright smile, which made everybody else also look at me, which made the Demon Lord of Darkness laugh, so I just nodded at Emmerich Holyblade to go kill the fucking Demon Lord of Darkness already.

God, that took so long. I’m taking a vacation. I’m disappearing into a forest without any elves in it and never talking to another person ever again.

At least now I get to know whatever Emmerich Holyblade wants to tell me. It better be good, because it’s the last thing he’ll ever tell me.

He, uh. He. Well he. Uh. Hm. Well. How do I put this. Well. Hm. Uhhhhhhhhhh.

E-Emmerich Holyblade, well, he.

Much to. To think about. yeah.

I said yes.

(via piratekayte)

comedownstairsandsayhello:

stuffaboutminneapolis:

FAFO IN MINNEAPOLIS

this asshole had the entire city scared he was going to lead some kind of klan march and rampage through an immigrant neighborhood. he showed up yesterday with about 5 people and “marched” less than one city block before counter protestors super-soakered his ass in 10⁰ weather, pushed him back to his hotel, and ran him out of town. so so so proud of my city

(via cheeseanonioncrisps)