i am so exhausted by every ounce of our modern existence. my phone is nothing more than a soul sucking void that sends me spiraling at every stupid scroll. you wake up and the first thing you see is the murder of an innocent woman. you scroll again, and it’s a 50k luxury bag haul. you scroll again, and it’s someone begging for aid during a genocide in a foreign country. you scroll again, and it’s a makeup tutorial for a glitter cut crease look. one more scroll after that, and now it’s a new pov of that same woman from this morning- being murdered in broad daylight.
they didn’t even let a doctor try to help her. she bled out.
this is all that our existence has become. constant fucking algorithmic feeds of nonsense sprinkled in amongst absolute horror that sticks with you for life. and even when you do put that damn phone down- that’s not removing you from the other daily forms of horror that is constantly moving throughout our daily experiences. when the screen is off, i’m still one paycheck away from homelessness. my loved ones are worried, picking rent over medication. 5pm hits and now i’m questioning if i’ll have enough food for the week if i cook too much tonight. i’m worried ill get sick again this month too, if i stress too much, and my immune system remains too weak from my last period of severe flu sickness.
i don’t even have health insurance. i can’t get sick again.