! HELL HOUSE !

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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna

Chalice* (Chal, Alice, Al, Lice) + in 20s^ + He/She or Hy/hym

Keyblade holder and patron saint of Luna Game. Real life fairy. Mage of Hope.

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Artist + writer who happens to be an ICT survivor and an unschool drop out, I survived isolation and I’m making it everyone else’s problem. I have DID and am learning to be more open/expressive about my alters. They all have sideblogs but also post here. I grew up on kinblr and had a family that believed I was an earth angel + changling so I’ve got that kin slop in me. Even after everything, I’m still Sollux Captor. I selfship, I have a billion ocs that I love to talk about, and I am very open about my own personal fetishes, this blog is 18+!

My main special interest has been homestuck since 2011, and FNAF since 2014. But I’m also very into art history, marketing/advertisement, disability history and internet horror. I talk a lot about capitalism + antisemetism + incest/CSA that often go untagged due to this being a vent blog. If that makes you uncomfortable, consider checking out some of my other blogs!

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Read my β€œfan"adventure!!! @inflatablehome
Art acc @sodachalice
Old art archive: @toontowncreepypasta
AVA/AVM acc: @rocketco
Beforus acc: @helpsman
Danganronpa v3 acc: @newdanganronpaversionthree
Trolls selfship acc: @teacuptroll
My nsfw acc: @liquidvessel
"Kin mems” acc: @pieceofpleastic

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Pinned Post easy tag finder > my face my art a2pect2 cla22e2 kurloz mituna save judas karma luna sollux sidney stelsa evan cain sugar chambers dylan wakeman john doe vigil wakeman juno lovette jury lovette darcy crawford

this feels like the same thing as me realizing that people who dont make ocs or character art in any way dont have like “characters in their head” like they dont just like think of a guy to entertain themselves. and its not that like they want to and repress it its just like a thing they dont do. they dont do that. what the fuck?

shimejikin
shimejikin

i think visual artists tend to interact with visual medium differently than people who do non visual arts and i didn't realize that until just now.

shimejikin

when i’m analyzing art in a “fandom"ish way i feel like i’m constantly going "how did no one see this. how did no one put this together. is no one seeing this. am i making this up?” typically because i am analyzing the visuals as an art piece alone with the text as well. both hold equal stock to me. its why i like comics or multimedium art so much. but i dont think anyone watching movies or cartoons or reading comics who don’t also make visual art are thinking about the same things.

obviously. but also like i grew up with visual artists. parents were and then dated other artists sisters were. etc. its one of those things where its like me and my family were having arguements about WHAT the meanings of things were not like. if meanings were there or not?

imagines michael and vanessa hugging and crying AAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

there was another au i really liked on tumblr i think it was just call like kill will? lets kill will? the kill will team??? i dont know actually i think i might be thinking of multiple aus there were so many aus i was obsessed with where michael and one of the other aftons depending on the artists headcanon would reconnect and rebond and do pizzaria simulator together (or sister location) and i would lose my MIND EVERY SINGLE TIME id go CRAZYYYYY AND NOW ITS HAPPENING!? VANESSA AND CHARLIE TALKED TO EACHOTHER?!?!?!?!!?!? AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHH

i wish more people would talk about special interests in the initial way it was meant to describe, the combination of typical autistic symptoms of obsessive behaviors, repetitive actions and extremely restrictive interests. my special interests often feel less like “i like this more than anything else” and more like “i literally only like a few things. i dont like anything else.” due to the way that my autism causes me to heavily restrict most things around me. due to this symptom i do have a really small worlds and i do have a really small list of things i’m able to do without freaking out and it’s something i do constantly work on, not because i’m trying to mask or hide my “true self” but because the symptom is genuinely like. negatively impacting my life. not because i like the thing “too much” but because i haven’t been able to learn how to become flexible enough to tolerate anything else. i think there can be a lot of joy and love found in special interests and they aren’t inherently a bad thing, but also they aren’t always inherently something that even comes with autism, let alone something that is always inherently enjoyable. i tend to feel a little left out of the conversations sometimes about special interests because they tend to just be summed up as “thing you love and know a lot about and makes you really happy and you love to talk about” when a lot of autistics special interests can be defined more like things they often feel compelled to think about about or are the only things they feel safe enough engaging with. special interests can even be negative, obsessing over something you don’t like in the same way someone would with their favorite movie.

its definitely one of those things that have changed over time with my experience being diagnosed with autism. i remember when it was sort of taboo to make light of someones special interest because a lot of the time it was talked about in more of a compulsive ocd way. which i also didnt relate to much either! im not someone who tends to feel 'compelled' to be into my special interests. but it is a change i've seen. i was always someone who leaned more on the side of just let autistic people fixate and follow what they want to. but as i get older i also realize that my special interests restrict me in a way that actually makes me really really upset in the same way like ARFID affects me. i have the type of autism where i restrict i guess anyways

i really really need to read those books i will soon and i will talk about them. i didnt read them as a kid out of spite because michael was dead.

I WAS SO OFFENDED at this point though im kind of convinced that scott will not let anyone write michael other than himself considering that the books are written by other people and have no michael and security breach and the games since ultimate custom night have been written by others and have no michael im of personal opinion that michael is a very personal character to scott considering him being open about nightmares about bonnie specifically and the way that scott has consistantly written about father/son abuse in the past and the issues with filling fathers expectations especially if theyre harmful to you. and you could say this is because hes catholic and catholicism is mostly about shit like that but id argue that hes a catholic because that narrative is something he finds very appealing for a reason. anyways im rambling i think to him michael is what the striders are to hussie. and i think that makes him very precious with the way hes written

it was so scary when they revealed that fnaf happened in a fictional town very close to MY small hometown. WHAT .AAAAAH LITERALLY GETS SCARED. ive never personally read the books but i literally felt like i was going insane when i read that they placed it in UTAH AAAAHH AAAAAAAHHHH

im sure ive talkedabout all of these details independantly but the fact that my father is a divorced furry who makes animatronics for preformances he put on locally and did cosplay and made fursuits and did sfx. the fact that i have two sisters who KIN THE TWO GIRLS IN FNAF. the way i worked in a halloween store and was paid under the table bc i was too young to be working there every year because they were our family friends. the way i grew up farming rabbits and chickens. IN A SMALL DESERT TOWN HELP ME GET ME OUUUUUTTTTTTT OF HERRREEEEEEEEE its just so funny to me. in my late eens/young adulthood i was like literally why was i so insane about kinning thats so embarrassing i dont understand who cares it means nothing and now im 24 and again im like O_O HEY WAIT A SECOND that isnt THAT COMMON. HEY

i dont talk about fnaf as much as i talk about homestuck because theres not as much to talk about irg to fnaf due to it being an open and closed story imo where as homestuck is like insane amounts of world building and metaphors and its longer than the bible. but fnaf has been my special interest for as long as homestuck and as consistant. i was joking ab it on bsky but my parents genuinely know that i think i am michael afton For Realz like ik ive mentioned them knowing about me being a kinnie but thats the main one theyre aware of. before i changed my name to jake i WAS going by michael irl. more people know me as michael in my hometown than they do as jake since jake was the name i picked right before i moved away. its really funny to me. what do you do as parents if your child is delusional about being Michael Afton Of All Characters. what does that imply about you? anyways. i wish i could find my old old fnaf art, i have a LTO more of it than old homestuck art, but it was all drawn traditionally and is at my dads house :( sad!!!

i made a lot more art for fnaf than i ever did homestuck which is crazy because i have a TON of old homestuck art my grandparents are very familiar with springbonnie and fredbear HAHAHA AAAHHHH I LOVE FNAF AAAAHHH