fgrobichiko:

elbiotipo:

effemimaniac:

fuckyeahcoelacanths:

membraneshock:

rip to all the “fuckyeah___” blogs that carried our society at one point </3

we are in the midst of a true Real One

Dude the fact a COELACANTH blog is the one that survived when the rest died off……..

(via strange-aeons)

stumpyjoepete:

tanadrin:

imagine how much more fucked up the history of the world would be if eating someone’s brains reliably conferred on you their memory and knowledge

(via egberts)

vibratome:

im just a silly lil kitty :3 (remembers infantilizing myself is annoying to everyone around me) i am nothing

(via handsmotif)

miaowzieks:

ALT

ALT

i think we turned out alright

caliphsmegmafactory:

The only reason I want kids is so I could chainsmoke around them constantly

maykitz:

can i matchmake you guys somehow?

miidniite:

flopugh:

#Benoit Blanc, the Ipad Kid

frothing at the mouth, waiting for someone to notice the ipad he had with him in wake up dead man

gregghead:

New favorite headline

redstonedust:

redstonedust:

put rainbow laces on all my shoes recently which is fun and sexy but has the side effect that i have gotten multiple “i like your shoelaces” from strangers and like. i cant NOT “i stole them from the president” in return. just in case. but its recieved mostly awkward laughs and looks of confusion. embarrasing myself in public out here over my damn shoelaces.

ALT

(via aphony-cree)

weepylucifer:

weepylucifer:

dry humping in its specificity as a term implies the existence of wet humping

not my best work

(via egberts)

neenarchive:

neenarchive:

neenarchive:

do you think people who are into reylo wanted fiona to go through with the wedding to lord farquaad

no, you know what fuck this. fuck you. we need to talk about the FEAR in max’s eyes here. Like all he wanted was to be loved by someone. by ANYONE. And to be a fair and decent leader. like wow Shrek and dreamworks i expected better from you than a message about how abuse victims ultimately deserve to be eaten by a big dragon. i suppose you think that’s feminist because she’s a girl dragon. what about fiona’s sexual empowerment? Fuck this. max deserved better. i’ve had it with this franchise. whatever at least we have fanfic. new chapter of my farqiona kinktober entry will be up on friday

So I’m in the garderobe at the ye olde market wherein I toil wiping my hands minding my own business, and I notice this maiden scowling at me. Note I’m wearing my hair in a medieval pageboy style and have a ‘seize the ogre’ tunic on. So I’m like

“make thy quarrel known wench”

And she just says

“Are you a fucking farqiona?”

and she started screaming like some wilde beaft at me so I was like 'stay thy tongue!’ and her mother runs in and says 'verily let it be known the lord farquaad and the princess are to be wed!’ and had.her thrown in the stocks for all of duloc to see her shame. And bought for me a whole suckling pig to apologise. a like, most merry day indeed

(via qt-kt)

twentybrokenipodclassics:

twentybrokenipodclassics:

punk-squirrely-ghost:

twentybrokenipodclassics:

the postal service names their shit exactly like how a 16 y.o. names angsty fanfic

Explain.

try and tell me literally any one of these would not fit above a short story about two wholly random men from the MCU fingering each other, or possibly 12 chapters of one or more characters from a CW show being in high school while having a photogenic but terminal kind of cancer. try.

ok so i want to say in hindsight i think i could probably have been clearer

woman-becomer:

woman-becomer:

woman-becomer:

ALT

who want me

I got lumpy in two. did you see

ALT

ALT

ALT

(via i-am-a-fish)

sexhaver:

99% of nose-blowers quit right before the one rip where they hit their sinus cavity’s resonant frequency and spend a solid 15 seconds blasting a thumb-sized wad of yellow phlegm straight out of their pineal gland and can suddenly smell colors

transfemstalin:

brazil is the only country we know exists for sure