-you can read about it on my blog, searching yumeship or Carmen sandiego oc on the tags can give you everything you need to know about shadowsan x spider lily, and also reika!

Please follow these rules. They may be annoying but by disobeying you can genuinely cause me harm and distress

-Please be compliant with it and my hcs!!! (It will be different I know XD) but I will only play along with my hcs because 1, this is not a Canon compliant rp and 2 i just don't wanna switch hcs man

-I also don't rp pairings with Canon characters, ESPECIALLY not dokusan. Please do not try and add that here I'm heavily nonsharing with dokusan and in my au she was horrible to shadowsan and spider lily and I don't wanna victimize her in any way because of past stuff. I'm strictly nonsharing to Canon x Canon. Please do not ask me to do so or if I'm dating a Canon character. I will deny and say my true love is spider lily

-But if you are a fellow shadowsan yume I can! I'm sharing! as long as it doesn't overwrite my shadowlily <3 I'll make a custom tag to play along with you! But do not try and take over shadowlily. You will be blocked. So oc x shadowsan, self insert x shadowsan, persona/sona x shadowsan is acceptable

-do not be weird. I'm a minor and remember there are admins behind the screen. Keep it sfw. I don't mind dirty humor but don't go too far. And don't mention stuff like suicide and sh etc

-and very important please do not in any way try to go too far with the role play. I as the admin have severe hypersensitivity and shadowsan is one of my fictives.on (so this can be very hurtful to them).on top of this I get very immersed in roles. Please do not try to antagonize or gang up. It is genuinely mentally deteriorating and I can take it very personally. Your character can hate me and insult as a joke. But please do not take it too far and truly antagonize him.

Sorry if I'm being too strict, but please do your best to follow!

Enjoy ❤️💕

snow-leopardrp

Reblogged

theheaddaphnestan

Shadowlily hcs but angsty bc I really hate myself

Going through a crash out (thanks mental illness) so may as well make this worth my while with hcs

I sound dry ash but like bare with me I'm just not having a good day at all

Shadowsan doesn't really care for what lady dokuso did to him, that's what he tells himself. He actually really does and it deeply scarred him but he won't admit that who are we kidding, but what crossed the line for him was when she bought spider lily into the mix. In his eyes the worst she can do is hurt spider lily. And she did by bullying her and scheming to get her memory wiped alongside cookie booker
The 2 were olkind of strained when spider lily regained her memory. Because after spider lily's memory was wiped shadowsan was locked in his dorm for 2 weeks sobbing until he just felt empty. By the time he left he became that stern mean guy we all know. So she's not used to this monotone shadowsan, not anymore. And she also felt scared of him in a way due to the trauma. They talked it out though. While shadowsan can not express his love like he once used to he does his best. And spider lily knows it
Shadowsan still gets nightmares of losing spider lily. One time they got in a fight and she was going to take a walk to cool off. He begged her not to go in fear that she will be taken again. And then something will happen and they can't resolve this. That something happens and he loses her and it ended on such bad terms
Spider lily on the other hand fears forgetting stuff. She would sit and stare at him a photo for hours just to remember what happened. She'd pretend to remember every memory shadowsan recalled. But he caught her when he made up a fake memory. She ended up crying because she just couldn't remember everything. And there's still so many gaps. She even gets temporary memory loss but it's more managed
While shadowsan worst fear is to see spider lily get hurt by lady dokuso and cookie booker. Spider lily finds it the best thing ever. Because it means shadowsan isn't hurt. She knows he can protect himself. But that doesn't mean she doesn't worry. He acts so tough but she knows he's just a mess inside and doesn't know what to do. Shadowsan is strogg physically but mentally not so much. Because if he's properly pushed to the edge he can let his guard down. This is how lady dokuso beat him twice. Knowing this she always tries to put herself in danger instead because she believes she can handle it. She can not either
When spider lily got memory wiped shadowsan would meditate daily. His meditation was him imagining spider lily was there. He couldn't cope.hed just pretend she's still there. At some point in team red his meditation got so frequent even Carmen was concerned.
On that caper in Korea when shadowsan saw a memory wiped spider lily he was full blown panic attack but the kind that are invisible and more stretched out. He was so unfocused and severely distraught. At some point almost passing out. Carmen did not allow him on the caper after finding out why. And sent him to stay at the hotel room they booked alongside Zack.
When spider lily was getting bullied she'd always act super confident like she didn't gaf what lady dokuso and cookie booker say. She did. She'd always cry later. Shadowsan caught her once. At the time they were just friends and he didn't rly warm up to her. But he got so frustrated he stormed up to lady dokuso and had a huge fight with her. Calling her and cookie booker insufferable pieces of shit. And that's how cookie booker hated him. He then took it on another level by getting revenge. He took spider lilies pet spider and put it in lady dokusos locker out of spite. Safe to say she and booker stayed away for like a month before getting revenge
Shadowsan would write letters to memory wiped spider lily. He knew she would never see them. But he'd write his thoughts and feelings. Deluding himself that she's still here with him he'd put it in her empty dorm room.
He'd also get obsessed with paper cranes. Because of the 1000 paper cranes legend where if you make 1000 you get a wish. Every time he reached a thousand he'd wish spider lily a happy life. Not to return to him. Because he blames himself. And his wishes would come true as memory wiped spider lily was having a peaceful life. Albeit she felt strangely empty.
Speaking of which spider lily always felt empty after the wipe. Especially with romance. She always wondered why. Now we know. She actually still had shadowsan locket. She never knew where it came from assuming it was an old friend
She got the locket because she stole it from him as a joke. But he told her to keep it as it looked perfect on her
The dollar bill from the exam was spider lily's. She and shadowsan bet a dollar on the gender of the next person to enter the classroom. Shadowsan won. He never used the dollar bill to buy. He never will. He used it in his coat examination to honor her. When tigress ripped the coat he actually almost panicked thinking she ripped it. But it was in good condition. So he relaxed. But never try to rip that bill.

That's all for now gang.

@melissatheshowgirl @the-ivy-in-it @theshadowsanstan @reynaisqueen56758 @jaedyn-here @boredomgayartist @cocoabonbon

snow-leopardrp

*deep inhale* SO BOTH PARENTS NEED TO CRY AND SHOW PROPER EMOTIONS⁉️⁉️

And they try to say I'm bad. Hypocrites.

shadowsancsofficial

I do not see what's wrong with this I'm stable

snow-leopardrp

Sure.... your crying still helps my stability

#1 abusive relationship won't kill me #< prev #and 5 abusive relationships won't kill me!

snow-leopardrp

Reblogged

theheaddaphnestan

Shadowlily hcs but angsty bc I really hate myself

Going through a crash out (thanks mental illness) so may as well make this worth my while with hcs

I sound dry ash but like bare with me I'm just not having a good day at all

Shadowsan doesn't really care for what lady dokuso did to him, that's what he tells himself. He actually really does and it deeply scarred him but he won't admit that who are we kidding, but what crossed the line for him was when she bought spider lily into the mix. In his eyes the worst she can do is hurt spider lily. And she did by bullying her and scheming to get her memory wiped alongside cookie booker
The 2 were olkind of strained when spider lily regained her memory. Because after spider lily's memory was wiped shadowsan was locked in his dorm for 2 weeks sobbing until he just felt empty. By the time he left he became that stern mean guy we all know. So she's not used to this monotone shadowsan, not anymore. And she also felt scared of him in a way due to the trauma. They talked it out though. While shadowsan can not express his love like he once used to he does his best. And spider lily knows it
Shadowsan still gets nightmares of losing spider lily. One time they got in a fight and she was going to take a walk to cool off. He begged her not to go in fear that she will be taken again. And then something will happen and they can't resolve this. That something happens and he loses her and it ended on such bad terms
Spider lily on the other hand fears forgetting stuff. She would sit and stare at him a photo for hours just to remember what happened. She'd pretend to remember every memory shadowsan recalled. But he caught her when he made up a fake memory. She ended up crying because she just couldn't remember everything. And there's still so many gaps. She even gets temporary memory loss but it's more managed
While shadowsan worst fear is to see spider lily get hurt by lady dokuso and cookie booker. Spider lily finds it the best thing ever. Because it means shadowsan isn't hurt. She knows he can protect himself. But that doesn't mean she doesn't worry. He acts so tough but she knows he's just a mess inside and doesn't know what to do. Shadowsan is strogg physically but mentally not so much. Because if he's properly pushed to the edge he can let his guard down. This is how lady dokuso beat him twice. Knowing this she always tries to put herself in danger instead because she believes she can handle it. She can not either
When spider lily got memory wiped shadowsan would meditate daily. His meditation was him imagining spider lily was there. He couldn't cope.hed just pretend she's still there. At some point in team red his meditation got so frequent even Carmen was concerned.
On that caper in Korea when shadowsan saw a memory wiped spider lily he was full blown panic attack but the kind that are invisible and more stretched out. He was so unfocused and severely distraught. At some point almost passing out. Carmen did not allow him on the caper after finding out why. And sent him to stay at the hotel room they booked alongside Zack.
When spider lily was getting bullied she'd always act super confident like she didn't gaf what lady dokuso and cookie booker say. She did. She'd always cry later. Shadowsan caught her once. At the time they were just friends and he didn't rly warm up to her. But he got so frustrated he stormed up to lady dokuso and had a huge fight with her. Calling her and cookie booker insufferable pieces of shit. And that's how cookie booker hated him. He then took it on another level by getting revenge. He took spider lilies pet spider and put it in lady dokusos locker out of spite. Safe to say she and booker stayed away for like a month before getting revenge
Shadowsan would write letters to memory wiped spider lily. He knew she would never see them. But he'd write his thoughts and feelings. Deluding himself that she's still here with him he'd put it in her empty dorm room.
He'd also get obsessed with paper cranes. Because of the 1000 paper cranes legend where if you make 1000 you get a wish. Every time he reached a thousand he'd wish spider lily a happy life. Not to return to him. Because he blames himself. And his wishes would come true as memory wiped spider lily was having a peaceful life. Albeit she felt strangely empty.
Speaking of which spider lily always felt empty after the wipe. Especially with romance. She always wondered why. Now we know. She actually still had shadowsan locket. She never knew where it came from assuming it was an old friend
She got the locket because she stole it from him as a joke. But he told her to keep it as it looked perfect on her
The dollar bill from the exam was spider lily's. She and shadowsan bet a dollar on the gender of the next person to enter the classroom. Shadowsan won. He never used the dollar bill to buy. He never will. He used it in his coat examination to honor her. When tigress ripped the coat he actually almost panicked thinking she ripped it. But it was in good condition. So he relaxed. But never try to rip that bill.

That's all for now gang.

@melissatheshowgirl @the-ivy-in-it @theshadowsanstan @reynaisqueen56758 @jaedyn-here @boredomgayartist @cocoabonbon

snow-leopardrp

*deep inhale* SO BOTH PARENTS NEED TO CRY AND SHOW PROPER EMOTIONS⁉️⁉️

And they try to say I'm bad. Hypocrites.

#carmen sandeigo 2019 #carmen sandiego #cs shadowsan #shadowsan #suhara #oc #carmen sandiego oc #Cs spiderlily #Cs shadowlily #oc x canon #yumeship #headcanons #headcanon #angst #Angst hcs #shitpost #lady dokuso #cookie booker #snow has a problem

Definitely sane

✨reblog if you're accepting anonymous asks about anything✨

CAUSE I AM GOING TO BREAK THE FUCKING TV IF SHE WINS. ONE. MORE. TIME!!!!

EPIC

EPIC

EPIC

Introduction.

Shadowlily hcs but angsty bc I really hate myself

Shadowlily hcs but angsty bc I really hate myself

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