I can't even

an erotic poem:

leg so hot

hot hot leg

leg so hot u fry an eg

I need a husband who would sit with me on a weekend to watch a show about cordyceps fungi controlling ants while sharing a tray of 7 hotdogs, 4 chocolate chip cookies, 217 potato chips and baby carrots and a giant bowl of ranch

the funniest man on the planet

I just KNOW part of why Dan lets his theatre nerd self out is because Phil loves it because we all know Dan is a simp and will do anything to make Phil laugh. The absolute joy on Phil’s face when Dan sings a HSM song is killing me

has anyone done this yet

NEVER KILL YOURSELF DAN AND PHIL HARD LAUNCH ON A RANDOM MONDAY IN 2025

So funny that Andrew attempted to side-step emotions by boiling it down to ‘I would blow you’, only to find that Neil doesn’t understand sexual feelings without emotions attached lmao he sees right through it immediately

Andrew: doesn’t mean I wouldn’t blow you

Neil: oh so you like like me

Andrew: no!! Shit! Fuck! Fuck!

Has this been done yet

quick reminder that you're actually not obliged to feel any empathy for someone who would have described your death as 'necessary' if the exact same thing had happened to you

i hate when something violent happens to a right wing politician and every left leaning pundit and politician gets on their soap box about how "violence isn't the answer" as if the right wing ideology doesn't inherently encourage violence.