UPDATED: 30/08/25

hello folks!

i am currently accepting commission requests. i have been writing for as long as i can remember and have been working as a professional writer for around five years now, meaning you can count on my work being of a consistently high quality.

here are my commission guidelines:

• my fee is £10 per 1,000 words; anything £40 and above is open to negotiation.

• minimum word count = 500 words; no maximum word count.

• for longer pieces, i will send a detailed plot outline for your approval before i start writing.

if you have any questions at all, or if you’d like to see a sample of my work before placing an order, feel free to shoot me a DM.

newyorkcitywater:

why is the human body composed of such capricious tubes

molluskmagus:

writerlyn:

The idea of “but everyone knows that” needs to stop.

I saw a post about someone chiding Millennials for not knowing about JKRowlings transphobia, and asking how it is at all possible that people can exist in the world and the internet and, you know, not know.

Which I mean, I get. It is so present in so many of my online spaces that it seems astounding that someone could simply be ignorant! It feels impossible!

But let me tell you a story:

I went on a girls trip with a bunch of friends. All of us are rather incredibly liberal and all of us are incredibly online.

One girl would not stop talking about Harry Potter.

At one point, another girl asked her why she was ok with supporting it, and she had no real clue that JK Rowling was at all transphobic. She had heard that she likes to support Lesbian causes and thought “oh ok cool!” And that was it. She was AGOG with the news and rather horrified.

I must once again emphasize that she was an incredibly online person. She’s a foodie and a restaurant blogger.

Later in the trip we were picking restaurants and I suggested one I found on Google, and she gasped at me. Actually gasped, asking how I could ever be okay picking that one.

The shock must’ve been on my face, because she then told me all of the shitty things that restaurateur does. He abuses staff. Underpays them. Fires them on a whim. Is known for being one of the worst people to his employees in the entire restaurant business on this coast.

And she was so shocked I had never heard of this. Because in her mind, I was just as online as her. And in her online world, EVERYONE knew about this guy.

So I think the moral of this story is: always approach the other person with some empathy. Even online people, even people you think MUST know about how bad people are, may not have heard. It may truly be just them being on a different sphere of the internet than you.

So be gentle, be kind when letting people know they might not have heard about the cancellation of XYZ person. Don’t assume that everyone knows all the same info as you.

By all means, let them know so they can make informed decisions, but being kind will go a lot further than attacking them for some info they might not know yet.

snoocupz:

And John, I love you, don’t you forget that.

dennisboobs:

yokowan:

yokowan:

okay I’ll bite

hawm

goodsirs:

Fallout
2.02 “The Golden Rule”

goodsirs:

Justin Theroux as Robert House in Fallout
— 2.03 “The Profligate”

icecreamwithjackdaniels:

Henriëtte Ronner-Knip (Dutch–Belgian, 1821–1909), “Study of Eleven Cats” (details), 1904

ofishal-fish-posts:

wake up in the morning. see picture of blorbo. im not dead and i can still look at pictures of blorbo. it’ll be alright as long as i can still look at pictures of blorbo. you agree.

blasto-the-hanar-specter:

Remembering Mike joking about Jay having a blood fetish and then Jay saying how much he liked Pennywise being covered in blood in Welcome to Derry.

We know your fetish you sick fuck.