Consultant, n.:
Someone who'd rather climb a tree and tell a lie than stand on
the ground and tell the truth.
😭
Listen, you big, stupid space-creature. Nobody, but nobody, eats the
Simpsons!

-- Homer Simpson
Treehouse of Horror
😗
History is the version of past events that people have decided to agree on.
-- Napoleon Bonaparte, "Maxims"
🤧
How can you work when the system's so crowded?
🤣
Remark of Dr. Baldwin's concerning upstarts: We don't care to eat toadstools
that think they are truffles.
-- Mark Twain, "Pudd'nhead Wilson's Calendar"
🤠
Q: Why do ducks have big flat feet?
A: To stamp out forest fires.

Q: Why do elephants have big flat feet?
A: To stamp out flaming ducks.
🙁
There was a little girl
Who had a little curl
Right in the middle of her forehead.
When she was good, she was very, very good
And when she was bad, she was very, very popular.
-- Max Miller, "The Max Miller Blue Book"
😱

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