Recent reviews by plumpy

Game of 2023!

no i insist

best game ever

bit ♥♥♥♥ yes

Good game for the money. Am very pleased that I was able to have my own achievement added to the game.

You want buy this game ?
I'm gonna show you somes tips for playing :
- Before the match starts, don't press accept. It's a test.
- The P in P90 stands for Pro. Like you.
- When told to pick up the AWP, stare at it and go AFK.
- Don't buy kits, this is actually team death match, the bomb wont ever get planted.
- You are amazing with the desert eagle, don't let anyone ever tell you different, not even the scoreboard.
- Very important: That thing attached to some guns is called a silencer, and you have to take it off because it reduces damage a lot and will get you more kills.
- VAC is a good anti cheat.
- Skins make you better at the game.
- When a teammate asks for a drop, drop them your handgun.
- Never adapt to the game. Don't betray yourself like that. Just do the same thing over and over again and wait until it works.
- Dust 2 is the only map in the game. There aren't any others. Don't argue.
- If you lose the first round. You MUST ALWAYS Eco/Save. Which means buy armour and an -SMG/Shotgun of your choosing.
- When going through doors, always make sure that you block the doors so no one can pass. - -- Ignore the hate of your teammates, you're pro and you're gonna get mad kills. You're also shielding them from bullets. How nice of you!
- Crouching doesn't improve accuracy, but do you know what does? Jumping! Be a ♥♥♥♥ing kangaroo and watch the mad kills pour in. ♥♥♥♥ EVERYONE LOVES KANGAROOS.
50 points to Gryffindor every time you change weapons.
- State that all SMG's take skill to use from no less than 4 inches away. Your gun is cheaper so it is worse. Rub it in with a teabag afterwards. Especially if you have a P90.
- Always tell the opposing team to good luck and have fun when warm-up ends. At half time, treat them like they murdered your family. (Be sure to take note of their nationality!)
- If you see a chicken in your gameplay, you absolutely must under any circumstance, kill that damn chicken. It must die. THIS IS NON NEGOTIABLE.
- Recoil control is a myth. Like Bigfoot.
- If you need to get around the map in a hurry, get out your Negev.
- The PP-Bizon is the discount Negev.
- Don't waste money on a helmet. $350 is too expensive. You wont die. Ever.
- You need to Look at the ground where you are going make sure you don't trip!
What the ♥♥♥♥ is strategy? done yes

Literal ♥♥♥♥!