dude below has the best grammar ever

alright kid you obviously have no idea who i am so i'll go easy on you, hahahah. i've been to iraq over several hundred times and have never had more fear in my heart than the day i got lost in a market seperated from my mother it was a truely soul crushing experience (don't say you wouldn't be twice as scared) however unlike you i took that fear and converted it into power, willpower more specificly; more specificly so the will power fo fighting off ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ likes you. flashforward to the year 1996 i'm in afghanistan nothing in my hands but the blood of my fallen comprades here's me ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ myself when i see over 1000 terrorists on the horizon ''what a bother'' i mutter and beat them all down hand to hand combat. so now that you know a little bit more about yourself, ask yourself. do you feel lucky... punk?
pussio pussio

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ＦＯＲ　２　ＷＥＥＫＳ．　Ｉ　ＡＭ　ＪＵＳＴ　ＣＨＥＣＫＩＮＧ　ＴＯ　ＳＥＥ　ＩＦ　
ＥＶＥＲＹＴＨＩＮＧ　ＩＳ　ＯＫＡＹ？　ＡＬＳＯ　ＷＥ　ＨＡＶＥ　ＰＲＥＰＡＲＥＤ　
ＹＯＵ　Ａ　ＬＩＳＴ　ＯＦ　ＶＩＤＥＯＳ　ＦＲＯＭ　ＹＯＵＲ　ＦＡＶＯＵＲＩＴＥ　
ＣＡＴＥＧＯＲＹ ．(Unicorn Porn)　ＳＥＥ　ＹＯＵ　ＳＯＯＮ

+rep really good aim and keyboard