crabussy:

crabussy:

thedepthsofmyshame:

crabussy:

“being a human is so boring why can’t I be one of the COOL animals” okay hey. I hear you. but I actually really super love being an omnivorous persistence hunting primate with a stomach capable of dissolving many literal poisons and the ability to smell geosmin (released in the soil after it rains) at five parts per trillion. I super enjoy being a bipedal terrifyingly agile mammal with some of the most efficient sweat glands in the animal kingdom. I find a lot of joy in being an endotherm with mimicry abilities that rival most other animals with vocal chords. it’s sick as hell I’m having a lot of fun

Sounds like what a shape-shifting non-human would say.

I’m a normal human person I literally cut my fingernails and laugh at jokes like a regular human. I’m a member of the species Homo sapiens and I have been since the day I was spawned

*born

koreanbibliophilegirl:

dannnnnnnnnnnnex:

inkvoices:

lightningladybug:

inkvoices:

inkvoices:

charlataninred:

blitzlowin:

eater-of-hopes-and-dreams:

meraarts:

charlataninred:

Love how tumblr has its own folk stories. Yeah the God of Arepo we’ve all heard the story and we all still cry about it. Yeah that one about the woman locked up for centuries finally getting free. That one about the witch who would marry anyone who could get her house key from her cat and it’s revealed she IS the cat after the narrator befriends the cat.

Might I add:

The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

The woman who raised the changeling alongside her biological child

The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

The adventures of a space roomba

Cinderella finding Araura (and falling in love)

I don’t know a snappy description but the my nemesis cynthia story certainly lives in my head

hilariously, these are almost all in my fic tag. so, a compiled list from the notes (and some extras):

1. The God of Arepo (graphic novel 1 / 2 / 3) (ebook)
2. The Monster of Sentan
3. The Witch’s Cat
4. Raise Both Children
   
5. Stabby the Roomba (honorable mention)
   
6. Cinderella Marries the Prince (comic)
   
7. My Arch Nemesis Cynthia
8. Pirates and Mermaid
9. Eindred and the Witch
10. The Demon King
11. The Cornerwitch
12. Grandmother Beetroot
13. Apocalypse Daycare Worker
14. Grandmother Accidentally Summons a Demon
15. New Year Saga
    
16. A Story About Changelings
17. Ranger in the King’s Forest
18. The Difference Between a Hare and a Rabbit
19. Goblin Men (Canines)
    

I am in love with you /p

Adding Faceblind Prince Charming and Cinderella

21. The human who died of radiation poisoning after repairing the spaceship

22. The defeat of the wizard who made people choose how they’d be to be executed

adding the Doctors Without Borders one

I LOVE tumblr storytime, so here’s a bunch more your weekend reading. Enjoy!

24. The Queen with Three Cursed Children

25. Tiny Dragon with one coin hoard

26. Haunted house

27. Shark hero was about to go rogue

28. Grandma lives in the woods comic

29. A Different Aftermath comic

30. Battery (microstory but I love it so much)

31. It’s A Date comic

32. Supervillian kidnaps rival’s kid and they want to stay

33. Narrative Town

34. I have been hired to clean the wizard tower comic

35. Robot Apocalypse

36. The Statues That Do Not Weather

37. Kushiel

38. Tooth Fairy

39. Alien abduction

40. Felonious wish-granting

41. When humans met actual space orcs

42. Space cousins

WAIT REBLOG THIS VERSION INSTEAD

43. The three princesses of the tower

44. Opportunity off to the afterlife

45. Transcript of Multiple Conversations Between the Awakened Hero of Legends and a Reporter

everynya:

food pantries and food banks are crucial in addressing the basic needs of individuals facing food insecurity. millions of people in america and puerto rico will be affected and have been these past and coming weeks. if you can donate to any of the ones that accept donations, if you have the means and are willing to, i ask you do to protect those who will struggle in these coming weeks. if not, thats okay, please at least share and i hope those who need this now can benefit from the support provided by this list. our communities need union and compassion always.

the plentiful app creates seamless and accesible ways to find food banks and visit them through their app to communicate directly with providers

foodfinder is another source that helps locate local food banks and food pantries

feedingamerica has their own food banks and pantries under their program which one can search for locally here

projectfoodbox offers food boxes curated by dietitians if ones insurance qualifies for it

foodpantries lists more than 16k food pantries, banks and soup kitchens

ampleharvest has local food pantries which accept donations from farmers with a surplus of fresh food

the little pantry helps find small, neighborhood pantries in areas supported by neighbors for free, similarly to the concept of little libraries

freedge helps create or find small groups in which people can share their food supplies and others can accept their surplus of foods locally

yhunger gives resources to young teens and adults in their local areas to help create budget friendly recipes, receive resources and receive any help

too good to go is an app that gives you restaurants, grocery stores and bakeries which donate their unsold foods to prevent food waste

i share these resources for anyone who may need them whether to feed their families through these times or who are willing to volunteer to support their local neighborhoods. many of these are free and need our support in this coming time of need for billions, just getting these out there to people in itself is enough. reblog, share, donate if possible or add on if you know any more resources that can help anyone at this time! 🤍

[ i will soon compile a list for hygienic products, the link would be found here ]

If the latest version is slow or generally uncooperative, you may find it beneficial to uninstall the current version, and install the 2016 version, 5.0.6.3.

The older version has virtually all the functionality you actually want out of the software, but it omits the parts that are causing poor performance on your device.

If you’re one of today’s lucky 10,000 who haven’t heard of it, LibreOffice is the software people are generally jumping ship to, in an effort to get away from Microsoft Office. More recent versions have become undesirably resource-hungry, but the 2016 version runs smooth as glass.

Best wishes!

rosieandthemoon:

unusual-suspects:

headspace-hotel:

headspace-hotel:

i do think we need to start treating spraying harmless “weeds” in your lawn as utterly absurd princess and the pea level of obsession with needing the world to revolve around your every whim, like.

Okay a flower grew out of the ground outside and you can’t cope with it. Do you need to sleep on thirty feather beds as well

in my meeting with one of the people who is over grounds on my college campus i was told that when the college stopped spraying weeds, they would actually get calls from people. complaining about the dandelions

and I was sitting here like okay this is why I shouldn’t be in a public facing job because i would be the rudest motherfucker imaginable about that.

what, are you some kind of spoiled child monarch who drinks out of a golden sippy cup? Do you have a retinue of servants at home to dispose of anything and everything that you might arbitrarily dislike? have you considered leading a life where you might encounter something that could be described as a real problem? do you call the weatherman to complain when it rains?

carmeliawrites:

thequeeninyellowlace:

inbabylontheywept:

inbabylontheywept:

Odysseus in Space

Odysseus knew better than to expect peace in death. He’d seen what currents lay under the Styx - knew what kind of warriors that he’d sent there. He fully expected another war to start as soon he took his last breath. 

Instead it had been quiet. 

He’d used the lull to build a home in the endless plains of asphodel. Somewhere simple he could stay and wait for Penelope. It only took a few years for her to join him, and then together they began the work of replicating the palace of Ithaca. It was work, but it was hard to complain about work when he’d expected battle. His greatest skill in life had been enduring to the end. Now it was the end, and still he endured.

It was three centuries before this death was interrupted. 

Keep reading

Reblogging because I found and fixed several typos in this and the knowledge that my beautiful Odysseus fanfic could exist anywhere in the world with even a single blemish makes me want to bite through a broomstick.

I don’t know why this doesn’t have 10,000 notes, but I’m gonna help.

One of the things which will change your brain chemistry

becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys:

coto524:

invisible-goats:

lavenderstocking:

becausegoodheroesdeservekidneys:

People who own rice cookers - what makes them better than just using a saucepan?

I am in the UK and so own a kettle to be able to get hot water on demand, rather than heating up cold on the hob. But I understand they have other advantages perhaps

It’s faster! Mine takes 12 minutes for white rice rather than the 20+ min a saucepan rice simmers at

I mostly just use mine for when there’s guests, I don’t find 2 peoples’ rice takes too long but 4+ and it’s a while

1. do not have to monitor the rice continuously to avoid sticking/burning — just leave it running and at some point while you’re dealing with everything else it clicks over from “cooking” to “keep warm” and you can come back to it in your own time
2. can cook other things too! i almost always have veg in the steamer basket, and if i want to i can add salmon in on top of the rice and bam that’s a whole meal with barely any effort
3. easy to make stupid amounts of rice e.g. enough for dinner, leftover for work lunch, and more leftovers to make fried rice on the weekend

Ooh, diddorol. Sut ti'n golchi'r peth? Ar hyn o bryd mae popeth yn mynd i mewn y dishwasher, ond byddai rhaid i mi golchi fe gyda fy nwylo corfforol?

Bydd chwiliad rhyngrwyd am popty reis diogel peiriant golchi llestri yn rhoi llawer o opsiynau da i chi. Yr unig ran y mae angen ei olchi yw'r leinin dur sy'n cyffwrdd â'r reis yn uniongyrchol. Pob lwc!